Things can and will get better

Greebo said:
4 years ago I was clinically depressed because of work and the thought of going to work made my physically sick. I was a mess, suicidal and had become an alcoholic.

I had an awful bullying employer who then tried to take me to a disciplinary for gross miconduct while I was off with depression.

Fortunately I had a very good gp who got me therapy plus I had good support from friends and family.

It took about a year to get me sorted out and face finding another job and working again.

Roll on three years and I'm still off the booze, working at a friendly family run firm who respect their staff and treat them well if you work hard and yesterday they promoted me to the board of directors (the only none family member on the board) and a 22% payrise.

Looking back I it could have gone so differently and my whole life could have been screwed up. I spent 12 years working my *** off for a boss who really doesn't deserve to have his own company and I pity anybody who works for him.

So anybody in a similar mess, all I will say, no matter how hopeless things look or feel, things can and will get better so long as you get help. I almost left it too late before I asked for help as didn't want to appear that I couldn't cope/handle it. Sometimes you can't cope or the things you are being asked to do is not right or fair.
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It's hard to turn things around when they seem hopeless. Well done, and good luck for the future

Devrij said:
On a similar vein of sharing turnaround stories, here's mine:

October 31st 2006 I was drunk, alone and stank of ****, puke and stale cigarettes. I wanted to die, but until that point had been too afraid to kill myself. Nothing had happened to get me there, I just happened to be an alcoholic and drug addict.

Fast forward to now, I'm sober, I start a new job on £32k next month (which I'm really excited about), and this Sunday I'm moving into an awesome 3 bed detached house with a garden. The best part is that I get to do it all with my fiance who is incredible and has sorted much of the move out while muggins here does the lifting, and my little girl who will be 1 in a few weeks and who is just the best thing in my life.

So no matter how bad things get, don't make permanent decisions to solve temporary problems, because things can change. It takes work, but you can get there. Even if you feel stuck.
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Your sharing of this story, or a version of it anywa, on these forums inspired me to believe I might be able to get sober too. I'm now almost 18months sober, and much happier for it. Thank you, and good luck with the move.
 
The best advice anyone can give in regards to not enjoying, or being bullied in your job is just leave.

Don't be afraid of what will happen next, just walk, it all works out ok in the end.

So long as you are prepared to do absolutely anything else to keep the money coming in mind. A lot of people will put up with their lives being made an absolute living hell rather than walk and go work flipping burgers for a couple of weeks.
 
phonemonkey said:
It's hard to turn things around when they seem hopeless. Well done, and good luck for the future



Your sharing of this story, or a version of it anywa, on these forums inspired me to believe I might be able to get sober too. I'm now almost 18months sober, and much happier for it. Thank you, and good luck with the move.
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That's awesome dude, I'm glad you're doing well!
 
I can totally relate to this, my last employer in the UK made me feel incompetent, hopeless and depressed. I hated how they made me feel and the impact that it had on my family.

I walked and became self employed......it was and is the bravest but ultimately best thing I have ever done.

As one door closes, another opens.

Well done and congratulations!
 
Thanks for posting, Greebo.

I went through similar last year, and am just starting to come out the other side now (still out of work, but off the meds and stable again).
Reading your post was a much needed reminder that my current situation is only temporary, and that I'll be ok again in the future!

so again, Thanks!
 
Thanks for posting.

I'm on a bit of a roller coaster at the minute, different toy your own, but it's helpful to read of such positive turnarounds.
 
Like I said, at the time I just couldnt see a way out or things changing. Deciding one morning not to go to work and go to the Doctors was the best thing I had ever done. I wish I had walked out of the job years earlier before I got to that stage though.

And a lost a year of my life getting better.
 
@rG-tom yes we met him.

@Greebo - Dude I knew things were bad, but I never realised how much. So glad to hear things are infinitely better for you now :)

Side note - I've dealt with my fair share of anxiety ridden episodes in life. How its controlled me so massively at times..I also just got out of a job of just 7 months where my boss was nothing short of nightmare...couldn't imagine putting up with it for 12 years.

So glad to hear everythings much better now :)
 
Devrij said:
"my little girl who will be 1 in a few weeks and who is just the best thing in my life."

So no matter how bad things get, don't make permanent decisions to solve temporary problems, because things can change. It takes work, but you can get there. Even if you feel stuck.
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You know, this is a really hard way to find out I'm not number 1 in your life. Screw you Dejeeri, screw you. :(
 
Nice to hear you sorted things out.

My grandmother gave me the best advice i've ever had.

"If you don't enjoy your job, don't do it".

Whenever I got to a point in things ive done where it became a chore, I quit the next day. Foolhardy, yes, but I live carefree for the most part and frankly, thats all that is important to me.
 
Brilliant, well done :) Really good to see people talking more about this subject nowadays.

I still struggle with it and can't find a root cause or fix. One day hopefully.
 
Greebo said:
So anybody in a similar mess, all I will say, no matter how hopeless things look or feel, things can and will get better so long as you get help. I almost left it too late before I asked for help as didn't want to appear that I couldn't cope/handle it. Sometimes you can't cope or the things you are being asked to do is not right or fair.
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That is the bit people and especially men, myself included, often don't do. We are a proud and stubborn bunch and throw in a dash of 'stiff upper lip' and it's a recipe for feeling unhappy without others knowing.

Glad everything has worked out well for you, thanks for sharing :)
 
I don't remember many threads from here, but the one about your work and the way you were being treated sticks in my mind. So good to hear that you got out, found something better and pulled yourself out from the hole that such a hostile environment put you in.
 
Well done Greebo, Good to see you've got yourself out of the situation after being there for so long. Must feel good knowing that you're free now and on course to taking a different path for yourself. May this one be more rewarding for you, good luck. :)
 
Congratulations on sorting things out.its very easy to slip into a hole & 8 or so years ago I was in a similar situation about to lose my home, slipping further into depression & generally have a pretty rubbish time.
now, I'm married to a great woman enjoy my job & debt free. just goes to show there is light at the end of the tunnel.
 
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