.

antijoke · 31 Oct 2017 at 12:15

Person in America was probably a bloke anyway, so I wouldn't worry about your gay encounter.

Trusty · 31 Oct 2017 at 12:24

You should get a medal, not feel guilty, you passed an important test. Well done.

glenimp617 · 31 Oct 2017 at 12:41

antijoke said:
Person in America was probably a bloke anyway, so I wouldn't worry about your gay encounter.

so his wife wouldn't have minded him cheating with a man? I fail to see what part gender plays in all of this? seriously? you do realise this is the year 2017. Gender should not be an issue at all, male, female, trans, bi, gay, lesbian, fluid, none, dual, beast

your comment has offended me greatly, and it is my right to be offended so I demand a public apology

and yes, beast is a thing.....it's called a tranimal

https://assets.vice.com/content-images/contentimage/no-slug/6e46e1f14ba63351c7d9b239bb78ae64.jpg

DrToffnar · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:09

People choose beliefs and opinions these days like they're picking Belgian buns from a bakers window.

Principles are easy to have until they're not.

Too quote the king of the painted table, "a good act does not wash out the bad, nor a bad the good".

Was it a horrible thing you did? Yes, regardless of whether you think walking away when you did changes that. Does it make you a bad person? Not necessarily, no. But come clean regardless. A relationship built on the foundations of dishonesty will forever be a shaky one.

Ayahuasca · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:10

AHarvey said:
If he tells her he is making it her problem, she then has to deal with it. Instead, he should suffer with his own guilt and learn to deal with it leaving his wife in the dark and ultimately a happier person for not knowing.

Yeah because keeping issues to yourself and not communicating is fundamental to a great relationship in this day and age. You'll often find those with a guilty conscience end up very untrusting of their partner as they realise how easy it is to cheat and get away with it, looks like the guilt is already an issue for OP and it's only going to fester. Granted a kiss isn't the end of the world but his wife deserves to know the truth otherwise what's the point in being married anyway if commitments made are just swept under the rug.

Chris Wilson · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:13

Before another Internet confessional ponder this sage advise my old man gave me:

Do right and fear no wrong

Don't write and fear no woman.

Uther · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:14

Be grateful you didn't wake up in a bath full of ice and a scar where your kidney used to be.

Chris Wilson · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:16

DrToffnar said:
People choose beliefs and opinions these days like they're picking Belgian buns from a bakers window.

Principles are easy to have until they're not.

Too quote the king of the painted table, "a good act does not wash out the bad, nor a bad the good".

Was it a horrible thing you did? Yes, regardless of whether you think walking away when you did changes that. Does it make you a bad person? Not necessarily, no. But come clean regardless. A relationship built on the foundations of dishonesty will forever be a shaky one.

Methinks there are a few divorce lawyers on here eager to PM you and send you their card. The OP should just STFU and tell the wife nothing. Take a cab next time and avoid young blonde bints for a few years until the hormones have subsided

bloodiedathame · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:28

How would you feel if your wife did that? Would you want to know?

TallPaul1878 · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:28

I was recently sleeping with an older woman whilst her husband was working away.

The relationship has since ended but she persists with sending me messages on What's App and trying to arrange a hotel break away.

I just want all this to end, I think she has fallen in love with, it's a total disaster.

dl8860 · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:31

TallPaul1878 said:
I was recently sleeping with an older woman whilst her husband was working away.

The relationship has since ended but she persists with sending me messages on What's App and trying to arrange a hotel break away.

I just want all this to end, I think she has fallen in love with, it's a total disaster.

Tell her to leave you alone or you'll sell your story to the papers. This is someone famous, right?

glenimp617 · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:34

TallPaul1878 said:
I was recently sleeping with an older woman whilst her husband was working away.

The relationship has since ended but she persists with sending me messages on What's App and trying to arrange a hotel break away.

I just want all this to end, I think she has fallen in love with, it's a total disaster.

The differences between men and women, despite the whole "both sexes are the same nonsense" is that men can relieve their sexual urges without getting emotionally involved. Women think they can, but they can't.

My advice here, is meet her and put an act on so she stops liking you. Just say some racists stuff so she think your an ass. Basically, get her to fall out of love with you.

TallPaul1878 · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:35

Well that one went over everyone's heads

glenimp617 · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:36

haha, well played

AHarvey · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:46

Ayahuasca said:
Yeah because keeping issues to yourself and not communicating is fundamental to a great relationship in this day and age. You'll often find those with a guilty conscience end up very untrusting of their partner as they realise how easy it is to cheat and get away with it, looks like the guilt is already an issue for OP and it's only going to fester. Granted a kiss isn't the end of the world but his wife deserves to know the truth otherwise what's the point in being married anyway if commitments made are just swept under the rug.

Not cheating is fundamental to a great relationship, the OP has already screwed that up, by telling her it's only going to screw things up more. I understand what you're saying about the festering, I've seen it, I've seen the mistrust but that's because she couldn't come to terms with it herself.

At the end of the day, we don't know the OP, we don't know his wife. It could go swimmingly well and she forgives him, she could file for divorce.

I still stand by that he should keep quiet and deal with his guilt knowing he won't hurt his wife. It's his mistake it should be his punishment, not hers. Ultimately, it's up to him what he does.

DrToffnar · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:52

Chris Wilson said:
Methinks there are a few divorce lawyers on here eager to PM you and send you their card. The OP should just STFU and tell the wife nothing. Take a cab next time and avoid young blonde bints for a few years until the hormones have subsided

It's all relative I guess. I've known couples that CAN just operate like that, but they've never operated in what I would consider to be a 'well functioning' manner. Maybe some people just dig those sorts of dysfunctional relationships? Hell, if there's a fetish for being eaten whole by a giantess... why not?

I dunno. Whilst I'd never say 'I could never doing anything like that you monster!', I'd definitely always be truthful about it after and just accept the consequence's.

the shadow · 31 Oct 2017 at 13:54

Lets get Graham on the show guys

Chris Wilson · 31 Oct 2017 at 14:05

bloodiedathame said:
How would you feel if your wife did that? Would you want to know?

So long as she doesn't have an accident whist boozed up on my trader's insurance, that's the main thing!!

Jean-F · 31 Oct 2017 at 14:35

TallPaul1878 said:
Well that one went over everyone's heads

Not everyone’s Paul, and I’m surprised it went over anyone’s actually, I thought it was a cracker.

413x · 31 Oct 2017 at 15:05

Thinking about it more it's really hard to out yourself in the other person's shoes.

I think I'd want to know, and It would obviously end the relationship.

I'd say there is something 'wrong' at home to do whether it's something simple that your mind strays, and the alcohol let your actions stray as well, relationship has become boring, you/her are pushing the other a way.. Etc etc etc.

Some action has to be taken, and pros and cons need to be weighed up. But I don't think telling her will do any good unless one of the couple are willing to action the break up.