Sister emotionally blackmailed away mums pension

For a start, they need to sell that house, pay your folks back and get onto the housing association. Or buy something with whatever is left.

I’m sure she’s going to be up for that after everything OP has told us about her, she’d disown her mother who’s paid for everything before doing that.
 
I’m sure she’s going to be up for that after everything OP has told us about her, she’d disown her mother who’s paid for everything before doing that.

The folks don't have any more to give. If the sister loses the house they'll both end up with nothing. The folks are too heavily invested in that house, it's why they keep helping.
 
The folks don't have any more to give. If the sister loses the house they'll both end up with nothing.

She doesn’t care about that she’ll cling on to it until authorities boot her out if it came to it, she’s already proven she hasn’t an ounce of responsibility so she isn’t going to take it on herself to sell up and do the sensible thing is she which is why OP needs to intervene.

She needs to get rid of that Timothy she calls a husband as well.
 
Next she’ll be using the baby as leverage.

If she hasn’t done so already, baby needs a house, needs a babysitter and so on.
 
For a start, they need to sell that house, pay your folks back and get onto the housing association. Or buy something with whatever is left.

There’s more chance of them selling it, taking the cash and go on a holiday to Ibiza.

Come back emotional blackmail some more and parents remortgage their house to keep paying her way.
 
Next she’ll be using the baby as leverage.

If she hasn’t done so already, baby needs a house, needs a babysitter and so on.

Started weeks ago

She actually phoned me to have a moan about dad being mean to her. Think she tried to pin the whole "dementia" thing on him No, I'm not making it up. They had an argument in the car when he was taking her for a baby scan. She was telling him to go down the bypass, but he wanted to go through town.

and that sorry excuse for a husband was backing her up, saying his dad was the same when he got older.

anyway, after the argument she said "you are not doing this for me, but for the baby"

There's tons more to this story, but the more I think about it the angrier I get

anyway, mums back home now after taking them out to here, there and everywhere so I'll ring her
 
I feel like this is already too far gone. The sister is now probably too used to getting what she wants and living off handouts that she'll never change and unfortunately it looks like your mum and dad through their own love might end up losing a lot.

Without meaning to offend you she sounds like a nasty manipulative piece of work.

You've got to talk sense into your parents before the baby turns up otherwise they will be responsible for bringing it up too I reckon.
 
Age old story of stupid parents doing too much for mollycoddled stupid kids..

Sorry, no sympathy..

It is your parents fault.

ps.

my auntie is 54 my grandfather is 83 and weeks away from death from metastatic prostate cancer (lungs, bowel, bones etc)

This is the same story as yours, except the end-game.. he has left everything he has to her, and she has emotionally drained my grandfather in to ignorance and her charity his entire life, there is nothing anyone can or could do.. its just one of the sad facts of some peoples lives.
 
What a vile spoilt scumbag your sister sounds like. You need to deal with it ASAP op. Speak to your mum first and get her to tell you where they stand finance wise and then speak to your dad and put a stop to this now for your parents sake before they have nothing left.
Tell your sister you know what she is doing and to stop it now for your parents sake. It’s only going to get worse once she has had the baby she will have them run ragged with check ups, doctors appointments and needing things buying etc. And to accuse your poor dad of having dementia :eek:. How old are they by the way? Are we talking 60’s or 70’s ?
 
That sounds absolutely horrific dude, I wish you the best with it. I don't want to say anymore until you've managed to flesh out the facts.
 
Can't really add anything to the replies you've already had OP, but best of luck with sorting it out. Reading it through made me really angry.
 
Sad thing is no matter how you bring this up with your folks your likely going to end up the bad guy.
 
OK, so I have had a brilliant chat with mum on the phone. Spent an hour chatting over a lot of things.
Something did happen to my sister about 20 years ago but mum could never get her to open up about it. I may know a mutual friend who may know so that maybe an avenue to try.

anyway, my mum is ok......a lot of stress from my grandads passing but she is aware of the situation and importantly knows that I know. She has had a good talk to my dad and they are going to be a lot tougher with her. No cutting grass, or doing the running around. They are stopping the money stream and going to get the lazy husband to try and convince her to go back to work.

I don't want to push this any further at this stage but they know I am keeping an eye on the situation so mum knows she has my backing. We went over the baby due next year and how they need to ensure they don't become a second set of parents. Help yes, all grandparents help out, but there has to be a limit.

My mum has given her thousands, she admitted that.....but her pension isn't all gone and she assures me she is financially ok. She's still working and can recover her savings somewhat. I guess it's not a total **** storm.

I'll be keeping a close eye on things and they know that now. Very easy to say all this, but doing is another matter.
 
She's more likely to go to the Moon than she is to hold down a steady job once she has a child to use as an excuse, she'll probably knock out a couple more
 
She's more likely to go to the Moon than she is to hold down a steady job once she has a child to use as an excuse, she'll probably knock out a couple more

I can't see her going back to work....and she's already said she wants another one. The baby will be a great excuse why she can't work.
She's the grand master at coming up with excuses.

If government handouts for two kids is near the same as a part time job at minimum wage then that's the answer for her.
 
I know this might sound silly but somehow try to record what you have talked about with your parents. Write down exactly what they will, and more importantly won't, help with in the future and when the baby is born. Get them to date and sign it as then they are making a commitment to it. Charity combined with the guilt trip your sister will retaliate with could lead to a slippery slope.
 
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