My wife just came in, and said, “Why are you imitating a pendulum?”
I said, “What do you mean?”
She said “I’ve been in the lounge, watching your head swing oh so slowly, left to right, ad infinitum.”
I said, “Sorry honey, I don’t think I’ve ever heard, or read, about so many people getting bent out of shape, (you guys do realise I’m saying it this way on purpose, don’t you?), about so many unimportant things.
“Whaddya mean?”
I said, “When we go Constancia, in Tower Bridge Road, how do you order your steak?”
She said, “Medium to well”, I said, “No, what do you say to the waiter when he says, are you ready to order?”
She said, “I say, can I get the Bife de Lomo, medium to well, with mushrooms and red peppers, no chips, please.”
I said, “BONG! You’re out, do not pass Go, do not collect $200.”
“WTF are you talking about”, she said.
I said, “According to some of the guys on this thread, if I say to you, are my sneakers in the trunk, you have grounds for divorce.”
She said, “You’d never say that, you’d say, are my trainers in the boot.”
“I know that, and you know that, but you also know that I’ll sometimes ask you for a cup o’ Joe, or if you open a bottle of wine, I’m likely ask you to fix me a vodka tonic, apparently these things are strictly no-no.”
She said, “No wonder you’re shaking your head.”
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