Ex wife called police on son and partners child fighting!

Nodiggidy123 · 14 Apr 2019 at 16:56

Further to my last post about my ex wife harrasing me because of a reduced CSA payment. I've just had a phone call from the local plod. Wanting details of my my patners child (10) after a squabble between them allegedly left a bruise on my sons (5) back apparently some timecago

Our kids most of the time get on fine but on occasion they fight. It never amounts to anything a push or a thump . And we are always around to ensure nothing escalates.

As for the bruise, my son is very clumsy, regularly coming home from school with bumps and scuffs on him or a sticker on his jumper to say he's bumper his head. So it could have happened anytime in a entirely different matter of cercumstances

You may have seen my previous posts ref her and her controlling and harassing behaviour towards us and this is the final straw. She's trying to control and dictate to me even though she's remarried herself.
I've currently got my son here now. Who's spend the last week with and her 2 boys.
It needs to stop. It's causing friction between me and my partner .

Any advice on what I can do?

Colonel_Klinck · 14 Apr 2019 at 17:12

I don’t have kids and have NO legal training but I’d go down and have a open and frank conversation with the police. Explain it all as you did here. I’m sure they get this kind of situation happen a lot but they would obviously be obliged to check on anything involving children.

ScoTTyBEEE · 14 Apr 2019 at 17:14

Don't have children with psychos.

d_brennen · 14 Apr 2019 at 17:16

ScoTTyBEEE said:
Don't have children with psychos.

Sometimes doing one creates the other

Fine · 14 Apr 2019 at 17:22

not a lot you can do.

Thekwango · 14 Apr 2019 at 17:41

ScoTTyBEEE said:
Don't have children with psychos.

How does that help his current situation?

agw_01 · 14 Apr 2019 at 17:55

Was it definitely a genuine call? Seems odd to me that the police would intervene because of a little scuffle between two young children.

Maybe I could understand it if she'd told them the bruise had been caused by you.

Orionaut · 14 Apr 2019 at 18:19

What a world we are becoming. :eek:

Police involved over two primary school age children scrapping! Really :confused:

Back in the day, both kids would have been given a spanking and a warning to straighten up and play nice!

I am glad I am getting old now and do not have to look forward to having to grow up in this world of crazy

:rolleyes:

Malevolence · 14 Apr 2019 at 18:24

Nodiggidy123 said:
Any advice on what I can do?

mmj_uk · 14 Apr 2019 at 18:24

agw_01 said:
Was it definitely a genuine call? Seems odd to me that the police would intervene because of a little scuffle between two young children.

Maybe I could understand it if she'd told them the bruise had been caused by you.

You're kidding right? it's all they seem to do these days because they don't have the common sense to refuse a complaint. You can accuse someone of harrassment with no evidence whatsoever and police will record it as intelligence to be used as evidence against you later if needed - again absolutely no evidence necessary police issue a warning and record it simply so that they can close the case.

TheVoice · 14 Apr 2019 at 18:30

agw_01 said:
Was it definitely a genuine call? Seems odd to me that the police would intervene because of a little scuffle between two young children.

Unfortunately that's the way things often are now, the police are finding themselves spending an inordinate amount of time dealing with "vulnerability" due to shortfalls in other services and blame being pinned on them when things go wrong, so now everything is taken to the extreme level in order to reduce risk to anyone and cover everyone's backs.

ivrytwr3 · 14 Apr 2019 at 18:43

A 10 year old and 5 year old do not 'fight' - the 10 year old is bullying.

Look at it from your ex's point of view - your child "occasionally" fights with your new partners child, who is double the age, and the fighting is hard enough to cause bruising? **** that and tbh you should be looking after your own flesh and blood more - tell the kid and the mother that if he touches your son once more...................

Nodiggidy123 · 14 Apr 2019 at 20:01

ivrytwr3 said:
A 10 year old and 5 year old do not 'fight' - the 10 year old is bullying.

Look at it from your ex's point of view - your child "occasionally" fights with your new partners child, who is double the age, and the fighting is hard enough to cause bruising? **** that and tbh you should be looking after your own flesh and blood more - tell the kid and the mother that if he touches your son once more...................

I go down on them both like a ton of bricks. Bullying isn't the issue and I can assure you of that. Of it happens if one of them doesn't get there own way. It never amounts to anything more than petit squabbles most siblings have.

hominid · 14 Apr 2019 at 20:14

Nodiggidy123 said:
It's causing friction between me and my partner .

That is probably the goal, to cause you stress to a point it messes with your 'new' partner.. Don't let it get to you, treat it as a totally separate thing to your new relationship and if need be get your son and have him live with you!

Nodiggidy123 · 14 Apr 2019 at 20:57

hominid said:
That is probably the goal, to cause you stress to a point it messes with your 'new' partner.. Don't let it get to you, treat it as a totally separate thing to your new relationship and if need be get your son and have him live with you!

I don't understand why she has to be so toxic. She's remarried. I've been with my "new partner" for 2 years now. Things have escalated now we've finally moved in together mainly to die to the fact that now I have other dependentd and more have more access. Her CSA payments go down. I've logged a complaint with the police about the abuse I get from her so now it seems she's trying other ways.

AHarvey · 17 Apr 2019 at 00:06

ivrytwr3 said:
A 10 year old and 5 year old do not 'fight' - the 10 year old is bullying.

Look at it from your ex's point of view - your child "occasionally" fights with your new partners child, who is double the age, and the fighting is hard enough to cause bruising? **** that and tbh you should be looking after your own flesh and blood more - tell the kid and the mother that if he touches your son once more...................

Oh, be quiet. You've obviously no idea what you are talking about.

Kids fight regardless of age. I'm the eldest of 5 brothers with an age gap of nearly 20 years between oldest and youngest. kids will fight regardless of the age or size difference. It'll start off with the youngest annoying the eldest and it'll escalate, and that's normally the plan.

My kids are 7 and 4, they occasionally fall out but the number of accidentally bruises just from playing nicely is crazy.

Within the last week my 4 years old headbutted his sister in the face, he's kicked me in the eye while we were play fighting and just today, I bent down to kiss his head and he jumped up and cracked me in the mouth splitting my lip. My daughter moved her leg out while she was reading on the floor just as he was walking past and he face-planted off the side of the armchair.

To the OP, the best thing you can do is work with your current partner, you know nothing bad is going on so do not let it affect you. Every time the ex kicks off, do something to strengthen your relationship. Go for a meal, go out with the kids, anything to show your ex that you will not let it break you. Keep a record of everything just in case and keep the police informed, but work together. It's not your kid and her kid, they are 'your kids' You are building a family.

LeeUK · 17 Apr 2019 at 00:37

Never volunteer to attend a police station for any questioning. I would just ignore it until/if it escalates.

ivrytwr3 · 17 Apr 2019 at 07:22

AHarvey said:
Oh, be quiet. You've obviously no idea what you are talking about.

Kids fight regardless of age. I'm the eldest of 5 brothers with an age gap of nearly 20 years between oldest and youngest. kids will fight regardless of the age or size difference. It'll start off with the youngest annoying the eldest and it'll escalate, and that's normally the plan.

My kids are 7 and 4, they occasionally fall out but the number of accidentally bruises just from playing nicely is crazy.

Within the last week my 4 years old headbutted his sister in the face, he's kicked me in the eye while we were play fighting and just today, I bent down to kiss his head and he jumped up and cracked me in the mouth splitting my lip. My daughter moved her leg out while she was reading on the floor just as he was walking past and he face-planted off the side of the armchair.

Oh no! Someone has a difference of opinion, therefore i must be wrong and you MUST be right!!

We're all rooting for the OP, especially from some of the tales he has previously told, but the fact remains that his son comes to him unscathed and goes back brusied to his mum - whether it's kids been kids or something more sinister PW (Psycho Wife) has the right to question the marks and as she is a PW will no doubt use this against the OP.

glenimp617 · 17 Apr 2019 at 07:37

Thekwango said:
How does that help his current situation?

The only plausible explanation is a time machine, but I don't think they've been invented yet.....so either they do and I just don't know about it, or it's a daft post.

StoutMeister · 17 Apr 2019 at 10:49

TheOracle said:
The only plausible explanation is a time machine, but I don't think they've been invented yet.....so either they do and I just don't know about it, or it's a daft post.

Well, if anyone should know, you should.