Autism diagnosis as an adult

[OpenToSuggestions]

Evening all.
Yesterday I completed an NHS ASD assessment. At the end of a 3h 40 min review they diagnosed me with Autism. I am now also on the waiting list for ADHD.

Throughout my life I have found other people hard to understand, and I definitely lack empathy.
Over the years I have posted here about struggling with a PhD and in various jobs as a design engineer. In Sept 2020 I moved to a new role where I was working from home 24/7. Six months in this broke me.

It feels quite strange to be in my 30s and obtain some understanding on why I see the world the way I do.

I am very hard on myself, however I am doing well enough in life (own house, car etc.). I know I am very intelligent, but there is something that I feel is 'missing'.

This won't change who I am, but it will help with encouraging employers to be more understanding.
There is definitely a feeling of upset as throughout school, university and work this has without question greatly affected me. There is also a sense of relief though too.

I am posting as I bet there are many OcUKers who can share there experiences.

 

[tbyeah]

How long was the process from initially contacting the NHS to now? I've been looking into this myself

 

[OpenToSuggestions]

How long was the process from initially contacting the NHS to now? I've been looking into this myself

Somewhere between 1.5 and 2 years.

 

[tbyeah]

Somewhere between 1.5 and 2 years.

That's the impression I had from reading about the way it's handled on the NHS. Such a long waiting period puts me off a lot, it feels very protracted.

 

[EdwardTeach]

There is definitely a feeling of upset as throughout school, university and work this has without question greatly affected me. There is also a sense of relief though too.

I am posting as I bet there are many OcUKers who can share there experiences.

Well done on getting the diagnosis. The frustration about getting a diagnosis quite late in the day is understandable, but I think it is much me recognised these days. There is certainly a lot more children being diagnosed.

I hope that it is of benefit at work, and that your colleagues and employers are more understanding. It is going to be healthy for yourself as well, to have more insight into why you are you.

 

[ganesh]

I am in the beginning process of the same thing, also with some ADD.
But I’m fairly sure I will go private, mental health has been absolutely dire the last 18 months and I cannot wait a further 2 years for a diagnosis.

 

[Bassmansam]

What do you struggle with the most OP? Social interactions, making small talk?

 

[OpenToSuggestions]

What do you struggle with the most OP? Social interactions, making small talk?

I struggle with aiming for perfection, work place deadlines, workplace politics, some OCD traits too but I hide those quite well. My biggest struggle is working with people who are lazy or incompetent. I also am not particularly sympathetic. I will help you solve the problem though.

 

[Rroff]

I definitely have some degree of it - conversely I find people very hard to understand but don't exactly lack empathy.

If I was at school now I'd definitely be diagnosed instead of comments like "potential but needs to apply himself", etc. one teacher did recognise some degree of it and for a year or two I had additional support but even then it was largely not understood or recognised and in some cases resulted in bullying by some teachers.

Weirdly it is something I recognised for myself fairly early on maybe because I was able to juxtapose myself with people seriously affected by it, there was 2 kids in my school year with full blown Asperger's, and my classmates who weren't and was determined not to let it define me - but I recognise that isn't something which those more seriously affected by it can necessarily see for themselves let alone understand how to approach working around it.

That hardest part for me, and like those with an actual genuine condition of anxiety, etc. is that for the most part people can't see the effort that I have to put into doing things which for them are completely normal never mind some things which are hard for people normally but might be prohibitive for me to overcome.

 

[jsmoke]

"potential but needs to apply himself",

I got that a lot from when I started school, When quite young it was good as I got attention from it but by the time I left school it was driving me crazy.

 

[OpenToSuggestions]

"potential but needs to apply himself"

Story of my life! Was kicked out of University. Had to grovel to get back in and left with a 1st . Was tough but worth it.

 

[~Divine~Wind~]

Mt son was recently diagnosed as having adhd, we had to fight pretty much constantly even for the referral.

Once we had the referral we were advised an appointment would likely be 18months+. How on earth the NHS believe 18month is acceptable for a young child in school is well beyond me. Effectively they were saying that the gov were happy for him to struggle constantly or even miss the next 2 year at school. That could've had a overwhelming impact on him. Was utterly disgusted with the NHS so went private, had an appointment within a month and he's now got. Medication that has noticeably helped.

For anyone asking and contemplating... if it's somethign at the forefront of your mind go private, the NHS wait lists are unbelievable. My nephew was diagnosed with autism and this outcome took the best part of 3 years for him via the NHS from his initial Consult

 

[Mason-]

I definitely have some degree of it - conversely I find people very hard to understand but don't exactly lack empathy.

If I was at school now I'd definitely be diagnosed instead of comments like "potential but needs to apply himself", etc. one teacher did recognise some degree of it and for a year or two I had additional support but even then it was largely not understood or recognised and in some cases resulted in bullying by some teachers.

Weirdly it is something I recognised for myself fairly early on maybe because I was able to juxtapose myself with people seriously affected by it, there was 2 kids in my school year with full blown Asperger's, and my classmates who weren't and was determined not to let it define me - but I recognise that isn't something which those more seriously affected by it can necessarily see for themselves let alone understand how to approach working around it.

That hardest part for me, and like those with an actual genuine condition of anxiety, etc. is that for the most part people can't see the effort that I have to put into doing things which for them are completely normal never mind some things which are hard for people normally but might be prohibitive for me to overcome.

You sound similar to me. I’m 99% sure I have some level of autism. I have similar issues that people in this thread describe, don’t pick up on workplace politics or care for it. Sometimes struggle with empathy. Like you I recognised it in myself and I worked very hard at it to be more empathetic and to do small talk, it is hard though.

I’m not really worried about getting a diagnosis though. I don’t think it would help me in any way. I manage just fine and I definitely have it milder than a lot of others. The job I work in there are a lot of super intelligent people (think Sheldon Coopers) who probably have Aspergers. In contrast I seem ‘normal’ (whatever that is). But then I go home and see my family and I feel like the ‘strange’ one again, like I have for most of my life.

 

[HangTime]

My sister was diagnosed with Aspergers when she was mid-20s. When we were growing up (80s/90s) our family didn't even know what ASD was, our mother also died when we we were kids so things like being a bit reserved as a teenager may have been put partly down to the trauma of that. Whilst I had friends I also found some social situations awkward, silly things like being scared to make phone calls or approach people so I would put it off, or walk somewhere and then turn around and walk back rather than knock on a door. But I don't lack empathy, whilst I can associate with some ASD traits I would say I'm far enough on the boundary not to bother any investigation.

Finding out about ASD later in life and looking back, a lot of things make more sense now. She had very few friends but was an avid reader, in primary school she'd be reading adult books and just churning through several books a week. At the time, I think she was just considered a shy nerd rather than having any type of condition. The school didn't pick up on it either, there would be stuff like she wouldn't read the books they gave her because she'd read them five years prior, she was quite gifted at Maths (did GCSE at 14) and Science and again I think she felt unchallenged generally in an academic environment but also a bit downtrodden by excessive bullying.

 

[Rroff]

I’m not really worried about getting a diagnosis though. I don’t think it would help me in any way.

I see friends and family's kids getting an Autism diagnostic and I recognise myself at that age in them - but now at 40 I don't see what help it would be for me - I've been able to overcome some of the stuff which would make me act or approach things a certain way as a kid by learning to recognise it and I can't really see how anything would make the rest any easier. I guess in some respects I've been lucky.

I know for others it has been immensely helpful - I worked for a bit with the mum of a kid I was at school with who was saying it made such a difference when it was recognised when he was around 20.

 

[Quartz]

I have behaviourisms consistent with being on the spectrum but it's far too late for me, and I'm retired anyway.

 

[DanTheMan]

Obviously autism is a wide spectrum but I'd like to think if you're self aware enough to acknowledge your autistic traits and express how they affect you, then you're doing well.

What are the options from diagnosis? Is it a case of understanding your issues in more detail and learning to accommodate them into your life?

 

[ganesh]

Obviously autism is a wide spectrum but I'd like to think if you're self aware enough to acknowledge your autistic traits and express how they affect you, then you're doing well.

What are the options from diagnosis? Is it a case of understanding your issues in more detail and learning to accommodate them into your life?

Self acceptance is a big part for me, getting a diagnosis would make me able to accept/like myself. Either I’m autistic, or I’m just weird & a miserable failure of a human.

 

[mid_gen]

Evening all.
Yesterday I completed an NHS ASD assessment. At the end of a 3h 40 min review they diagnosed me with Autism. I am now also on the waiting list for ADHD.

Throughout my life I have found other people hard to understand, and I definitely lack empathy.
Over the years I have posted here about struggling with a PhD and in various jobs as a design engineer. In Sept 2020 I moved to a new role where I was working from home 24/7. Six months in this broke me.

It feels quite strange to be in my 30s and obtain some understanding on why I see the world the way I do.

I am very hard on myself, however I am doing well enough in life (own house, car etc.). I know I am very intelligent, but there is something that I feel is 'missing'.

This won't change who I am, but it will help with encouraging employers to be more understanding.
There is definitely a feeling of upset as throughout school, university and work this has without question greatly affected me. There is also a sense of relief though too.

I am posting as I bet there are many OcUKers who can share there experiences.

It was about 3-4 years ago when I realised I'm autistic. It was a Chris Packham program about it that made me start reading up....it was a revelation...I don't think it's overstating things to say that so much stuff in my life suddenly made sense.

Spending 35+ years with this uneasy feeling that you don't experience and feel things the way that most people do....to suddenly realise that yes, you are just wired up a little differently....was such a huge weight off. It's really helped me, even just with a self diagnosis, to be conscious of the differences.

I don't really feel like I need to use the NHS's limited mental health services to get a diagnosis, and I'm leery of going private and basically having to pay someone....but I would like to at some point as I'd quite like to do more advocacy work and suchlike. I've already led some changes to the interview process at work to make the experience easier for autistic candidates.

 

[OpenToSuggestions]

Obviously autism is a wide spectrum but I'd like to think if you're self aware enough to acknowledge your autistic traits and express how they affect you, then you're doing well.

What are the options from diagnosis? Is it a case of understanding your issues in more detail and learning to accommodate them into your life?

The report will take around a month to come through. I'd like to understand the issues really. I'm in full time employment as an engineer at a large firm, however people have never been very understanding/accommodating about the way I see things.

It is very interesting to hear the experience of others .