You've made progress since I posted, and tbh this is probably more a virtualisation/Qnap issue rather than anything *BSD based. However, to answer your question: No, different NICs require different drivers, even from the same manufacturer. For example, staying relevant to this case, some Intel NICs use the em
driver and some use the igb
driver. It's the former which has issues with PPPoE on FreeBSD and related OS (like OPNSense).
If you use such a NIC (eg Intel I350) you will suffer single queue/core issues with maxing speed under PPPoE. Switching to a NIC that uses any other driver (such as the aforementioned igb
driver) removes this bug/limitation and no speed issues present, PPPoE or not. You can check which driver you're using by checking the dmesg log: more /var/run/dmesg.boot
and scrolling through until you see mention of the network adapter(s) and their driver.
Edit: On *BSD PPPoE is still single-threaded and as such will only use a single encapsulated queue on the NIC. My advice about running Linux based OS for routing/firewalling using PPPoE stands, and your headache will instantly disappear... Try OpenWRT, VyOS or IPFire (no IPv6 or WireGuard in the latter), or even barebones Debian and some text file config magic.