Need some advice surrounding a problematic brother (long thread)

[Supercow]

Jeez Phate, that was a hard read. My first thought after reading the OP, was to contact the parole officer in charge and to try and get your brother back in jail, as he really seems to need to be there, but reading through the rest of the responses, it seems that was a dead end.

Are there any independent organisations you might be able to contact, like the Citizens Advice Bureau or the like, that might be able to guide your inquiry?

 

[sithlord]

OP, your brother sounds like a *****.

Get him in jail. Then with his cooperation (talk him into it) get him to move area after he comes out.

Its the environment and friends that are the problem.

 

[Steveocee]

Unfortunately you can only help someone who wants to be helped.

I think if I was in your position I would try to distance myself from him and also try to influence all family to do the same thing, it's a tough one because the response will be that "all my family turned their back on me" but maybe just maybe if he ever makes a decent human being then he'll be able to look back with a different perspective.

 

[phonemonkey]

Suggest you and your parents look at the Narcotics Anonymous website. I'd be surprised if there isn't some advice for loved ones of addicts, possibly even links to their version of Al-Anon. Higher Powers and 12 steps might not be your thing but don't discount the useful practical advice, if nothing else, these people might be able to offer. After all they've been where you are.

I think at this stage you probably need to look after you and your parents even if that means some harsh decisions, enabling his addictions and behaviour will only prolong it. As a recovering alcoholic I know that it wasnt untilI hit rock bottom and finally wanted help that I stopped. If people around me had tried to cushion that landing, I might still be falling. Hitting rock bottom hurt like no bodies business but nothing else then that pain was going to get me to stop. Don't prolong his fall.

Good luck whatever you decide, its not easy. You and your family are in my thoughts tonight