23 and not sure what to do with my life.

[Devrij]

Dude, maybe you just need to bum around and go back to uni when you're ready for it (or not). I have a friend in her 6th year at uni and who's still in 2nd year so you're not the only one. Get some rubbish job, get some money in your pocket and **** about for a year or two until you realise it's pants and want to do something different. Take up some hobbies outside of your house and meet some nice girls etc. Sitting at home is not good for your mental health so if you're doing that, get out.

The key here is action: if you don't change anything, it will stay the same. Sounds obvious? Easier said than done? Yes and yes. If you are really really depressed, go talk to a doctor about it. There's lots of therapy available on the NHS (I know, I'm a happy customer), so there's no excuse.

Either spend some time actively doing nothing, or get off your arse and do something. Devrij out muthalover

 

[sigma]

The key here is action: if you don't change anything, it will stay the same. Sounds obvious? Easier said than done? Yes and yes.

Excellent point there. The grass isn't always greener on the other side. It's pretty depressing being in a **** job feeling as though you're going nowhere.

 

[Dr.EM]

I find myself in a similar position, also 23 but on the first year of a course I'm pretty unsure about, with all the years between college and now basically being a waste of time (stagnant jobs, failed foundation year at a better uni, unemployment). I don't mind the course that much but it's at a very poorly rated university and I really dislike "student life", it's not where I feel I should be at my age.

Like you I feel quite trapped and obviously unhappy. Hope you find something that makes you happier soon! Of course I can't suggest anything myself though.

 

[agnes]

Hmmm, I can kind of offer advice/help.

I faced this issue before college, I took IT and dropped out due to hating it and never took it at school (GCSE), tried the army, injured, left during training.

Then I got really upset, down and I guess depressed, felt like I had nothing going for me at all. Then I took up IT! How random, friend of a family member heard I was good with computers and managed to get me a job as a server techician! Knew nothing about them to be honest. But it turned out to be a simple hardware setup job.

Anyway, zip forward to today, have been in the industry over 5 years, considered a hardware professional, just taken on a junior role in a more software heavy admin enviroment to skill up with my software. I genuinly didn't think my 'hobby' of computer stuff could take me somewhere.

As said, the new job is a bit of a pay loss for me, but I am also 23, and look at it this way. In 3 years time, I will have a lot of experiance for my age, a lot of knowledge and would have worked in the time gaining the 2 above! Which to me, out weighed going to uni!

So, my advice to you is, if you know what you want to do, get stuck in. Take a low paid job in the industry. Don't wait for jobs to show up, ask!

"Hi, are you advertising for any jobs at the moment?"
"No"
"Ah, sorry, well I am looking for work in the industry to gain experiance, would you mind taking me on at a junior level? I can be the tea boy!"

Bang, you have experiance, and are learning... Oh, and getting paid

ags

 

[tibbsey]

I do feel like Iam laggin behind, freinds from school have graduated from honours. My brother has done law, fought in afghanistan, attended and completed police college.
Just feel like Iam becoming the black sheep.

That's irrelevant. **** those guys.

 

[singist]

Sorry to be an old fart but you really do sound like someone who is willing to blame anyone and anything to justify being a loser who can't take responsibility for their actions.

So, when you eventually drop out and don't find employment, you'll be blaming your parents, the teachers at your old school and the university for your situation; together with the old ' I'm a depressive so can't be expected to do anything for myself '.

Do you want to live on benefits or with your parents for life?

Get some self respect, find something that you really would be interested in and take responsibility for your life.

If you genuinely have mental health problems, get some professional help and take their advice/medication.

Again, sorry to get on your case but you are resposible for your life and NOBODY else; 23 years old and acting like a spoilt 'Kevin'.

 

[wildman]

this is why this country is coming to its knees, the indigenous population are lazy, un-motivated, work-shy benefit scroungers and the foreigners just move in !!!

 

[Twentyone]

Sort your depression out. That looks to be the root of your lack of motivation and direction.

100% this.

And ignore the people that has no clue what it's like to be depressed. Expectations from parents etc can be a huge burden for some people, especially if your brother is some kind of super human who has 'done it all'

 

[Myshra]

Ignore your parents crap (sounds like pushy mother syndrome), go find a second opinion with another doctor. Don't worry about your brother, so what if he's done that and besides, you're 23.

Be more positive, you'll be fine in the end no matter what the outcome. You took a great first step by actually realising you need to do something, you just need to continue down the path by taking some action I have 2 siblings and while we all started with good intentions of going to uni we all ended up different - 1 Finished the course (in IT) and stayed in the field, 1 dropped out within the first year of law but now runs a bank branch, the other scraped an OK mark in their course (mech eng) but now is an army officer. This is all within 3 years each of leaving uni.

If you think you can finish the degree - I'd suggest you try do it. Personally I got a graduate scheme placement with my company but the only requirement was a degree. It didn't even have to be something related (the marketing people who were taken on at the same time had degrees in history and physics). It shows that you can finish something, gives you something to offer employers and you should feel proud of it.

If you don't though, big whoop. You gave it a shot but the field you went for turned out to not be a fit with you. That's all. People re-train their entire lives when the change job, change responsibility. This isn't all that different in my opinion.

You have absolute control over your life and have the ability to change all aspects of it. Find something you love and grab it.