A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son.
They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks.
"What are these, Dad?
To which the man matter-of-factly replies, "Those are called
Condoms, son. Men use them to have safe sex".
"Oh I see," replied the boy.
"Yes, I've heard of safe sex in health class at School"
He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and asks,
"Why are there 3 in this package?"
The dad replies, "Those are for high schoolboys,
One for Friday, one for Saturday, and one for Sunday."
"Cool" says the boy.
He notices a 6 pack and asks,"Then who are these for?"
"Those are for college men," the dad answers,
"TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday, and TWO for Sunday."
"WOW!" exclaimed the boy, "then who uses THESE?" he asks,
Picking up a 12 pack.
With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied,
"Those are for married men.
One for January, one for February, one for March......."
A Glasgow man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away.
She protested, 'But we don't know anything about each other.'
He replied, 'That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along.
So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort.
One morning, they were lying by the pool when he got up took off his
towel, climbed up to the 10 metre board and did a two and a half tuck,
entering the water perfectly, almost without a ripple.
This was followed by three rotations in jack-knife position before he again straightened
out and cut the water like a knife.
After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on his towel.
She said, 'That was incredible!' He said, 'I used to be an Olympic diving champion.
You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along.'
So she got up, jumped in the pool and started doing laps.
She was moving so fast that the froth from her pushing off at one end of the pool would
hardly be gone before she was already touching the other end of the Pool.
she did lengths in freestyle, breaststroke, even butterfly!
After about thirty lengths, completed in mere minutes, she climbed back out
and lay down on her towel, barely breathing hard.
He said, 'That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer??'
No, she said, 'I was a hooker in Govan and I worked both sides of the Clyde
KaHn

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