Best Man Speech Help!

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R.O.S.S.I

R.O.S.S.I

R.O.S.S.I

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3 weeks till i'm the best man at my best mates wedding and i'm struggling with the speech a tad.

Not struggling in getting pen to paper but struggling with stories and how to make them relevant. Is it OK to just tell a funny story for the sake of it? I.e. do you need to have an underlying point to the story about the groom?

I think I've got the structure down which goes like this:
  • Little joke about the food to open.
  • Thanks to guests, parents, groomsmen, bridesmaid and bride and groom
  • Introduce myself
  • How/when i was asked to be best man
  • How me and groom met and became friends
  • Funny story about groom
  • Brief mentions of a few other funny moments from past
  • Relay short message from someone who couldnt attend
  • Heartfelt bit about groom
  • Heartfelt bit about groom and bride
  • May throw in the gag about the cake being in tiers here as I may actually be a bit teary at this point.
  • Toast and end
Ive not had a verbal run through yet but typed out its nearly 2 pages long (1200 words) so i'm thinking it'll be roughly 5-7 minutes?

Anyone any words of advice or anything they can offer up about the speech? I'm not going to go near anything offensive or similar and I wont be swearing either.
 
Don't get jokes from the Internet, they've all pretty much been done to death. The cake being in tiers is so predictable it's pretty cringe worthy.
 
How after years struggling and experimenting with his sexuality, he finally found his perfect partner after a few months on Tinder.
 
The stories don't need to be relevant. My best man (who was a woman as it goes) told a story about me photocopying my bum and laminating it as a gift for my wife. No idea how she got that one in.
 
Aedus said:
Don't get jokes from the Internet, they've all pretty much been done to death. The cake being in tiers is so predictable it's pretty cringe worthy.
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I've not really, the laughs are more observational about people attending really. Ive never actually heard the cake in tiers one but yeh I can imagine its been done to death!

Vonhelmet said:
The stories don't need to be relevant. My best man (who was a woman as it goes) told a story about me photocopying my bum and laminating it as a gift for my wife. No idea how she got that one in.
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Ah, thats good to hear, will press on with what ive got at the moment then. Threw a wobbler before as I thought it had to have some meaning behind it!
 
Get stuck into everyone, thats what I did.

Groom, bride and bridesmaids all got it.

Just have fun with it, I dont get why everyone tries to be too serious with it.
 
Funniest one I witnessed was the best man grabbed a big bunch of A4 pages and started going on about how he met the groom at naval school. Explaining (in a very dead pan way) that rhey went on to become pilots and had some near death experiences together.

After he sucked the family in a bit he turned around and said "hang on, this isn't my speech... that was the movie top gun". Hilarity ensued :D

It's one of those that you need to do right, or you look a plumb though.
 
I used the following joke for my speech as groom you could adapt it:

But at this stage I'd like to tell you all that really this is a marriage of convenience.... pause. My wife is funny, beautiful, kind and would do anything for anyone. Conveniently for me she wanted to marry me.

Caused a few laughs.
 
If you think a joke is too risky then err on the side of caution. There's nothing less funny than an intentionally rude best man who thinks all of the guests are there to see his failed stand up routine.
 
[FnG]magnolia said:
If you think a joke is too risky then err on the side of caution. There's nothing less funny than an intentionally rude best man who thinks all of the guests are there to see his failed stand up routine.
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+1

Witnessed a best man try and make a joke that the groom was a paedophile, I'm pretty sure the bride still hates him for it.
 
Done 4, just stand up there and wing it, talk about your good times (nothing too crass depending on the audience) and be sincere. Don't script it unless you have to...
 
Lack of modesty alert: I gave a great best man's speech at my brother's wedding a few years ago.

What worked for me was to write it out almost word for word a fortnight before the wedding and then revisit it the night before the wedding, when I boiled it down to several bullet points that would prompt my memory but leave plenty of room for winging it as I wasn't struggling to recall a script.

Give yourself a structure with a reasonable idea of how you will fill in the blanks but don't stress about exactly what you will say.

As for the content:

You should explain how you know the groom but do not talk about yourself otherwise or recall events in the first person. This isn't a chance to sell yourself as a top lad who has lots of larks.
Say something genuinely nice about the happy couple.
A joke that hints at sexual/romantic misadventures is fine but don't go any further. Trying to get a laugh by shocking the audience or humiliating someone is a sign of desperation.
Keep it short for Christ's sake.
 
Vore said:
Done 4, just stand up there and wing it, talk about your good times (nothing too crass depending on the audience) and be sincere. Don't script it unless you have to...
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dont wing it. plan and practice. it should sound unscripted but thats only because you have polished it and practised it enough.
 
The best speeches aren't rude or humiliating (you make yourself look like an idiot by doing this). Keep it short, don't wing it and make sure you big your best mate up... you can break him down a bit first.
 
I don't have too much advice other than don't be too harsh, I had to rip up a couple of copies as I was going to town when I was best man and it would've been too harsh. My mates would've appreciated it, as would he, the rest in attendance probably not. Oh, and don't drone on, the Brides father's speech will probably drag and drag, then the Groom's speech will be run of the mill, it's up to you to get everyone laughing but do it quick fire, 5 minutes max.

I also wish you luck, it's something I feel everyone should experience at least once but I hated it, the weeks before, the anxiety over the content of the speech, the lead up to it on the day, it wasn't a good feeling. I'll never do it again.
 
My best man opening joke was:

"Bride, place your hand on the table, groom, place yours on top. Look at each other, really look at each other. Groom, know that from this day forward, this is the last time you have the upper hand"

It's corny and terrible, but it got some good chuckles to break the best man speech's ice.
 
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