Wow, it seems like I've stirred up quite a discussion here... Here's my update on the card.
The card arrived on Thursday and went straight into the Dan Case: surprisingly easy to fit in there for its size. I used Afterburner to undervolt it (to keep things cool - something I did for my 1070 too) and put it through its paces, playing all the games I normally would: No Man's Sky, HITMAN 2, ARMA 3, Witcher 3, Skyrim SE (+100GB of mods), Civ 5, Watch Dogs 2, Ghost Recon Wildlands, and a couple others which I can't remember. Paraphrasing Soldier from Team Fortress 2: "I have done nothing but play video games for three days". Also stuff to do with a 5,000 mile move, but, hey, who needs sleep?
Anyway, I managed to turn up all the sliders in most games without any problems. I'm running at 1440, and Freesync keeps it between 60 and the max 95, only dropping lower if I supersample like mad in games that allow it. The temps peak at 70 ish when pushed, but stay in the 60's normally. Honestly, I play for a couple of hours at a time normally (when I have other things to do besides waiting to have something to do), so whacking things on max and playing for hours at a time is the closest I can get to a synthetic benchmark without actually downloading or buying one. After about 10 minutes of checking temps constantly, I was back to getting my arse kicked as if nothing had changed from a week ago, albeit with more frames and pixels. I think I'll be happy for a long while.
As for the warranty, I think I got seriously lucky. I registered the card on EVGA and uploaded my eBay receipt. On my product page, it shows "Days Left: 679"! Nearly two years of warranty left - not too shabby! Even if the card craps out sometime soon, I should still be in a good position!
Maybe a 5700 XT or 2070S would have been a better option - I sure would have loved to go team red again after a long period of being green. However, I've got 2/3 the whole warranty, performance which makes me happy (doesn't take much, honestly), and a little bit of peace of mind that I can keep playing in the coming years. Hopefully by the time this card ***** the bed, AMD and Nvidia's RT will be more mature.
Thanks for the advice and discussion, guys!