Compulsively Noisy Colleagues...

Soldato
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I work with the most infuriatingly noisy bloke. Nobody I've met in the 28 years of my life gets on my wick quite so much as this guy.

He'll spend the entire day being noisy. This usually entails whistling whatever song was impressed in his small mind by the radio on his way into work that day, for most of the day. Usually it's the same lines over and over and over.

Further to this, he often claps very loudly along to his own whistling or singing, which drives us all to distraction. Another favourite is to drum objects with his hands or to pop chewing gum loudly. It's almost as though he's spent his 40+ years on this planet trying to be as loud as humanly possible. The company I work for is very small, with 6 employees in a small industrial unit. This guy can be heard anywhere in the building almost the entire day. It's actually a relief to turn on whatever loud machinery we happen to be using, as it drowns him out (sometimes).

Words have been had, but there's only so much that can be done because he's the MD's son. He therefore is immune to all disciplinary action, and generally behaves like a teenager (our 16 year or apprentice acts more maturely). Incidentally, the MD works from an office 50 miles away in London, so he's completely detached from the annoyance. He's just got back from a 2 week holiday, and during that time everyone was happily working away and getting along fine. Now he's back, people are snappy, and morale is down the toilet.

Do you have to put up with persistently noisy people at work? Have you managed to get them to stop, and if so, how?

Rant over.
 
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I hear your pain.

We have a guy in this office who slurps his tea really loudly. Add to the fact that he has tea around 10 times a day makes it really annoying.

He also farts.
 
I hear your pain.

We have a guy in this office who slurps his tea really loudly. Add to the fact that he has tea around 10 times a day makes it really annoying.

He also farts.

I had this when I worked in an office.

Slurps his tea/coffee.

Stinks, washes very rarely, the smell got progressively worse through the week until his Monday wash.

Sucks his fingers and makes slurping sounds while sucking his fingers.

Farts/burps.

Eats extremely loudly and like a slob.

Doesn't listen to anyone.

Sleeps and snores at his desk.

Very poor personal hygiene, once made a brown mess in the toilet, attacked it with a toilet brush, got it everywhere then put the brush in the sink (?) and just left it for another person to find, then owned up to it once some one else found it "Oh, yes, that was me".

Makes really annoying noises throughout the whole day.

Expresses faux-intelligence at every opportunity.

Messes everything up for everyone providing he's happy.

I so wanted to windmill him while holding 2 heavy objects.
 
I wear headphones at my desk so I can't hear anyone, I do have to keep my eye on the phone though but luckily it has a flashing red LED when its ringing :D
 
Play radio 3 really loudly until he complains :p?

In seriousness though, surely you can send an anonymous letter or something to the MD if you are going to be driven absolutely insane.
 
Surely all 6 of you can complain at once? Even if he is the MD's son, they won't ignore the whole work force for the sake of one.

If its anything like our place, they can and will ignore it. Mainly because it is easier that was as there is no confrontation!
 
Tell him to stfu.

/thread

Check, and failed

Better still go tell his dad.

/end

Check, and failed.

Play radio 3 really loudly until he complains :p?

In seriousness though, surely you can send an anonymous letter or something to the MD if you are going to be driven absolutely insane.

We recently put forth a joint complaint, and upon being reprimanded regarding his general lack of respect for everyone, his behaviour and noise making, he came out the office in a massive sulk, said nothing to anyone and went home for a day and a half, then carried on as usual after a week or so.

He's going to be the manager when the current guy retires in a couple of years, so the company will fall down around his ears if he doesn't change. I hope to leave next year anyway, and all I have to do is think of him to give me the motivation I need to do my HND.
 
Just follow my easy 3 day plan.

Day 1, super glue all of his stationary to his desk.

Day 2, Put a noose on his desk, next to a note saying "Do what comes naturally".

Day 3, Fill his coffee with laxatives, lock all the toilets and put a bucket in the middle of the room.

If he doesn't have a mental breakdown you better put up with him because he's clearly a retard and doesn't know any better.
 
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Just follow my easy 3 day plan.

Day 1, super glue all of his stationary to his desk.

Day 2, Put a noose on his desk, next to a note saying "Do what comes naturally".

Day 3, Fill his coffee with laxatives, lock all the toilets and put a bucket in the middle of the room.

If he doesn't have a mental breakdown you better put up with him because he's clearly a retard and doesn't know any better.

.................

Win.
 
But telling compulsively nisy people to STFU makes you evil.

However, I will choose to be evil. No mature adult should have any desire to be disruptive to people around them. I surely wouldnt want to be disturbing any colleagues by making noise. I hate people that feel some kind of need to go around singing, whistling, making noise, drawing attention towards themselves, even more so when they sound far less appealing than listening to a braying donkey all day long would.
 
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