You shouldn't dwell on what was or what could still have been. I've done that myself before and I ended up suffering more that way and once I realised that it was the other halfs loss and not mine there wasn't much other form of motivation needed. I managed to pick myself back up and got on with it, wasn't easy but its possible. I was young at the time, still am tbh but it tought me a valuable lesson in life and thats never to let people get you down. Life is never easy and life is never 100% perfect but we all have to deal with these things sooner or later and with the sound of it your spirits are still high so hang in there and look at this as a lesson in itself. All the best for the future, keep that head up =D