Divorce Proceedings - Financial Settlements

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da_mic_1530

da_mic_1530

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Naturally the obvious choice for a thread on divorce is a specialist computer forum...expect to see me popping up in the internet dating thread soon :)

I'm after a bit of advice from people who may have been through all of this before. Without boring you with the details, me and the wife have agreed to split, and now see wants £XX financial settlement.

Now she's verbally told me of what is is she wants, and I can accept what she wants with a view to avoiding the expense of court.

I don't currently intend on getting a solicitor, I'm just going to pay 50% of her solicitors fees with a view to an amicable divorce....


The question - Her solicitor wants me to financially "disclose" my information, (12 months bank statements, 3 months payslips etc) is this standard practice at this point? I was hoping I would receive a proposal through the post (as per our verbal discussion) which I could be sign and be done with it. This suggests she may want more, however if it's just the "done thing" I can rest easier.

Depending on the replies I'll seek legal advice.

Many thanks for any sensible replies
 
Housey said:
Ive not been through this myself, but as a near 47 year old many of my friends have. On the basis of the above I would strongly urge you to get representation, you will get shafted.
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This.

I believe the legal term is 'lawyer up or lube up'. Something like that. She might well be amicable but there's nothing to say that will last, especially with outside input with no interest other than money.

They want your payslips so they can figure out how much you can afford to shell out, not if you can afford what you and your ex-wife agreed.
 
Get a solicitor! 'her solicitor' will be telling her all sorts to shaft you over. I have seen this happen under different circumstances but the other partys solicitor wanted to go deep into financial commitments with a simple open and close case 'Divorce'.

They are greedy and just wanted more work, more money. In the end they did it with forms downloaded online and paid £350.
 
Get a Solicitor because you are about to get royally screwed. If this was going to be amicably settled between the two of you then neither of you would need a solicitor, the fact that she has one means that you NEED one.
 
DannyDrama said:
They want your payslips so they can figure out how much you can afford to shell out, not if you can afford what you and your ex-wife agreed.
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This, get a solicitor, get one asap, otherwise you're going to get reamed big time.
 
My wife has a solicitor but they are useless.

As far as I am concerned, once one side instructs a solicitors to act on their behalf it is no longer amicable.

Despite being perfectly capable of issuing divorce proceedings herself she has sought to waste money and had the cheek to demand I paid for half of her fees.

Luckily working in a barrister's chambers has its perks and I am currently bogging her down with litigious correspondence. The cost so far to me? A coffee.

If I was not lucky enough to have a barrister acting on my behalf I would have had to instruct solicitors.
 
Get solicitor - get them to write to her lawyer saying that you and her have agreed a settlement and get him to write a proposal for her to sign.

If you are on speaking terms then speak to your ex rather than speaking through lawyers as it gets awful expensive. I was fortunate that my ex never decided to shaft me, as a result i made things easy for her but was only able to do that by talking.

Have you got kids?
 
Many thanks all, *sigh* legal fees ahoy!

No kids

I was hoping there would be no need for me to waste money on a solicitor UNTIL I see a financial proposal that I don't like. This was the key point for me, if she'd have sent me a solicitor's letter with "I would like XYZ", I could then,

A. Say yes
B. Say no and get a solicitor myself

The fact they want to see all my finances first means I just have to start paying for one much earlier

Top tip to all, no matter what, sigh a blooming pre-nuptial before marrying!
 
Don't think of paying her bills.
Forget that for a start, you will have your own solicitor and your own bills.

Get one, one experienced in family law, preferably on referral.

With no kids, things should be much simpler.
How long were you married?
How much do you own together?
Does or did your wife work, and does she continue to do so?
 
Without wanting to divulge to much on a public forum....

No kids
8 years together, 4 years of joint mortgage, 1 1/2 years (how embarrassing) of marriage
I earn 15k more
Both full time employed

Reason for divorce, she wants to be "young" again, and is basically blaming me (unfounded IMO, but it's a moot point in the grand scheme of things)

So, in summary, headlines from OCUK are,

1. Get a solicitor
2. Don't give her financial disclosure

My original question still stands however, even if I do get a solicitor, there will no doubt be the disclosing of finances in order to understand both parties current status.
 
Id tell them to **** off its none of their business :)

Id also send them a letter saying youve already agreed an amount, so thats the only figure your going to accept.
 
Going through the divorce mill myself at the moment.

If you are seeking financial remedy then you will have to disclose the information. If you go for a clean break (separation deed) then it comes equipped with a sentence (legal term) that "both parties have viewed each others personal finances (and sometimes assets).

Get a solicitor by all means. With no kids the starting point for divorce and finances will be 50/50. Me personally I would take the offer but thats only because I've shelled out over 20k vs 0.00 for my ex.
 
RaohNS said:
Going through the divorce mill myself at the moment.

If you are seeking financial remedy then you will have to disclose the information. If you go for a clean break (separation deed) then it comes equipped with a sentence (legal term) that "both parties have viewed each others personal finances (and sometimes assets).

Get a solicitor by all means. With no kids the starting point for divorce and finances will be 50/50. Me personally I would take the offer but thats only because I've shelled out over 20k vs 0.00 for my ex.
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Thanks, current experience was what I was hoping for, it's easy to say "tell her to do one" however I've been told that it will cost more in court than she's asking for in the long run. The main question was regarding the disclosure of the finances, which you have answered.
 
Having been divorced and been through this......

If your Ex has said she wants a Financial Settlement and has already given you a broad outline of what she wants in it. Go to the court and collect a clean break and financial agreement form. Fill it in yourself and send it on to her.

Her solicitor will either contest or sign up. Either way you will know where you stand.

Do not provide your financial status until you've done the above.
 
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