Do legitimate escort services exist?

[Deadly Ferret]

I'm turning into an old git and so am thinking of attending a school dinner. I have something of a girlfriend, and although she's a nice enough sort I want to really wow the old boys, get them salivating and make them green, and alas she just wouldn't do that.

I was thinking of hiring a glamourous sort for the evening, but I lack relevant knowledge. Are there actually legitimate agencies for this sort of thing, or are they all prostitution-based? If the latter, do they give discounts for not providing seedy services?

Cheers.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

I'm a realist. She's a very nice person, and has a good figure. Face leaves a fair bit to be desired though.

She won't find out. I cover my tracks. She doesn't even know which school I went to, let alone about this dinner.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

None of the people who will attend are considered friends. I'm still in contact with the people I liked at school. I haven't seen any of this lot for ten years, and I haven't even met the majority of them. I just want to see the snobs feel inferior for a change. They're mostly the competitive sort. So am I to some extent I suppose.


Thanks Anim. If you know any reputable ones, please would you e-mail me the info.?

 

[Deadly Ferret]

or you genuinely want an answer to your question, however, you don't actually have a girlfriend and are just using that story for humorous effect.

I don't blame you for thinking that. You don't know the sort of person I am. As I said, she's 'something of a girlfriend'. It's not serious. I'm not the fall in love type. I'm a man, not a bloke.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

Just imagine how you would feel if your 'girlfriend' hired a male escort because she though you were bit of a dog.

I'm no oil painting. I've got a decent build, alright height, but I'm balding and my face is average at best.

I'd probably think 'cheeky mare!' and have a chuckle. She'd probably take it completely differently, but then she's a bit sensitive.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

If you think shes not much of a looker then why are you with her?

She's good fun to be around, and I enjoy her company. Great conversationalist, and an impressive intellect.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

DF - google for escort agencies, check the websites. most will list they they are available for functions etc etc, you will be able to tell from the website if they are just prostitution (unlikely) or proper escort services.

Cheers. I did try a bit of searching before posting, but I came up with the sort of results children shouldn't see...

I'll give it another go with different parameters, see how I get on.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

Well I could pretend I'm embarrased by all this feminist-sounding condemnation, but I'm not. Better to be honest about my outlook and opinions than claim to be anything other than what I am. Whether that's a dinosaur, a chauvinist, heartless, or any other label you wish to bestow, so be it.

What about here?

http://www.takemetodinner.co.uk/

Considered applying to join last year when money was a bit tight, decided against it though

Thanks, but I think that wouldn't work as I'd need the lady to put on an act, and that's not something an ordinary single one on a date would likely do.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

Oh yeah, thanks Rich.

This one looks suitable: http://www.takemetodinner.co.uk/member_profile.aspx?id=769

Will have to look into it in-depth when I get a chance. I'll report back, and if it does actually go ahead I'll see if I can take a few sly mobile phone pictures of the evening.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

I saw girls just as good looking down the pub, nothing special pretty girls are everywhere.

That's true enough, and the only reason I'm willing to pay for this idea is that the lady in question would be providing an acting service. I don't have time to play the numbers game and find one who could be a real knockout girlfriend.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

You will make your deceit obvious

Your faith in me is touching.

I may be generally outspoken, but I can be subtle when the need arises. I'd play it cool, act as if she's wallpaper, and let her presence do the impressing without me drawing any attention to her. I'll busy myself with general smalltalk, and only discuss her in passing if & when she comes up in conversation.

This very thread embodies exactly what I was doing wrong.

The more you try to wave the escort in their face, the more they will realise that you are placing yourself below them and that you require their approval.

See above.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

Just don't go if you don't like the poeple. Plus, if you're an ugly git, and you're not rich, they'll all know you paid for her anyway.

Not liking the people is part of the whole point. I want to beat them at the sort of game they routinely play with each other. You might see it as lowering myself to their level, and that's probably the case, but I see it as getting one over on the reprobates. If I were a little less sane, I'd have hunted certain of them down on dark, lonely nights and staved their skulls in for various infractions during our school days. This is my non-psychotic way of having the last laugh.

I'm not ugly, I just don't have great looks. I'm not rich, but I now have enough money to appear rich, not that I'd bother making any effort to do so.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

he's embarrased to be seen with GF- totally unforgiveable.

Several people have said that I'm embarrased to be seen with her, but that's not the case. I simply want something more classically attractive.

As for wanting an airhead, people have that wrong too. She'd have to be more than good looking to create the effect I want.

He's already said she looks so bad that he's ashamed to be seen with her...

I said no such thing. She is not ugly, she just doesn't have a pretty face, or at least I don't think it's pretty. Nor am I ashamed of her. She simply can't be what I want for this event. My aim is to create a wow factor, and she can do that in all respects except for the face.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

LOL.. funny thread.. as if a top quality escort is gonna waste her time going to a poxy high school reunion in a run down PE hall.. this bloke is in lala land

It is neither a high school nor a reunion. It is an alumni high table dinner. In case you're not familiar with the term, here's a useful site that might improve your general knowledge.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

Why? You've said yourself these people are not in your circle of friends and you don't really know them anymore.

Why do you care what they think? Why do you need to make your life into a little lie for the night to impress them? Are you that annoyed and ashamed of the way your life has worked out?

If so, thats quite sad. If not, then why are you doing it?

It has nothing to do with how my life has gone. It's simply about settling old scores in a non-violent way. The correct a-word, if you must have one to describe what's going on in my head, is anger. I'm still seething over a couple of incidents involving half a dozen people...who may or may not attend. If they don't then no harm done other than to my pocket, and I'll just make the best of the evening. If they do then fantastic, revenge shall be mine.

My life won't be a lie, just the bird. There is relevance in that, re: the old scores, but it's a long story and one I don't wish to tell.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

well it must be about women.. maybe something like 'youll never pull a top bird' .. and if it is that.. hey hey guess what, they were right.. lol

With perception and a keen wit you'll go far. Perhaps you can develop them.

Then asking a question such as this on a public forum, where it was only to be expected that a majority of the userbase wouldn't exactly see the reasoning behind such a post, wasn't the best idea.

Hardly that. The curiosity of others doesn't inspire or compel me to elaborate.

 

[Deadly Ferret]

I can probably guess the old scores and I sympathise - but surely bringing a lie with you is... a bit fake?

Yes. But I think it would be satisfying nonetheless.