do nice guys allways finish last?

spike's · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:12

Zip said:
Ok heres one for people.

Why is it always the girl that likes me isnt the one i like and the one i like doesnt like me?
And i dont go chasing the ones that dont like me it just turns out like that. And i feel i cant justify going out with the girl that likes me because she is second and it wouldnt be right to her if i did.

lol, so true.

Zip · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:15

VIRII said:
Have you ever tried treating a girl that you fancy badly as though you don't like her very much? Generally they come onto you like a steamtrain if they think you don't fancy them. Failing that be there with a bag of chips when they get dumped and get a rebound in. Do that a few times and you'll get a bad boy rep and the world's your oyster until you're about 23-24.

The Girls ive liked are single usually so no chance on a rebound.

I once accidentally treated a girl badly and i really paid for it and we dont talk

Who knew she actually did like me

I do remember back in a bout year 8 and 9 i would let my hormones go wild and let them them control me somewhat and i used to get much more attention from girls back then.

These days i would prefer to get a proper girlfriend and settle down though

kitten_caboodle · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:16

No. Unless I'm considered a booby prize, in which case, yes

Kell_ee001 · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:17

I've been out with both bad lads and good guys - I preferred the good guys by miles and never broke up with one for being "too nice".

It might be an age thing because for the last couple of years I've been pretty sure of what I want out of a relationship, and I know a bad lad will never be able to give me what I want.

VIRII · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:17

Spacky said:
Am 26 whats left on the cards now apart from old age?

There's still plenty of time and a growing market in divorcees.
Maybe you yourself don't really want a relationship deep down, hence you push away those that like you and pursue those that don't like you.

When you stop thinking and trying one will land in your lap. I remember waking up one morning and thinking that I'd been with my (now) wife for 5 years and wondering where all the time had gone. The relationship had always been so natural, it didn't fell like a normal relationship, she never nagged me or emotionally blackmailed me.

So don't go looking too hard or you'll seem desperate and scare girls off.

Spacky · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:21

VIRII said:
There's still plenty of time and a growing market in divorcees.
Maybe you yourself don't really want a relationship deep down, hence you push away those that like you and pursue those that don't like you.

When you stop thinking and trying one will land in your lap. I remember waking up one morning and thinking that I'd been with my (now) wife for 5 years and wondering where all the time had gone. The relationship had always been so natural, it didn't fell like a normal relationship, she never nagged me or emotionally blackmailed me.

So don't go looking too hard or you'll seem desperate and scare girls off.

Thanks VIRII, you can be my e-best man

Zip · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:31

VIRII said:
There's still plenty of time and a growing market in divorcees.
Maybe you yourself don't really want a relationship deep down, hence you push away those that like you and pursue those that don't like you.

When you stop thinking and trying one will land in your lap. I remember waking up one morning and thinking that I'd been with my (now) wife for 5 years and wondering where all the time had gone. The relationship had always been so natural, it didn't fell like a normal relationship, she never nagged me or emotionally blackmailed me.

So don't go looking too hard or you'll seem desperate and scare girls off.

The girl that likes me, i get a long with is nice to me(most the time) and we are very close but she does a whole heap of things that i wouldn't do and would cause a lot of trouble further down the track.
And if she goes to a party and gets drunk she goes all weird the next day, she even talks faster then she normally does and we usually end up in some sort of fight over nothing then a lot of apologies about a 30 mins later.
But apart from then we get along most the time. And are really close.
I dont know what it is really :confused:

McDaniel · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:34

Theres a girl i really like at the moment (no not you VIRII) ive not really felt like it for a good while to, she got dumped by her boyfriend about 2 days ago and obviously is really upset; trying to comfort her and she wants to know what to do, and as much as i wanna try and fix there bridges as it be, i also dont; yet i dont just wanna try and get her on the rebound, because it wont last long. We are quite close anyway, her boyfriend dont really do much with her, so we often go out together instead and work together, i think last week she saw me more.

And out of all her mates it was me she rung when she got dumped, but i think ive gone for the classic "friends" route

so im thinking no luck; but then she always says im a lot like her boyfriend in small ways, but i dont put other things first, and i have treated her when we are out (like paying cinema ticket, just little things) which he never does, and he gives her no attention, but i do... but i think im just leading up to a big fall... which has happened before - but i cant help but be nice.

Spacky · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:36

Computer geeks are relationship glue for the ladies.

Use and abuse and they ask for their pc to fixed in the meantime

fatiain · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:38

kitten_caboodle said:
No. Unless I'm considered a booby prize, in which case, yes

Mmmmm boobies. Oh you mean booby prize.

LeoWyatt · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:39

I do indeed get the boobies prize

Piggymon · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:58

I don't believe you can be too nice at all !

I've never ever gone for the bad boys .. never been at all interested. Some guys who I thought were nice treated me badly but i've never intentionally gone for a bad one

On the other hand I couldn't be with a guy who was like a puppy dog, never disagreed with me and was a wet blanket .. that would drive me up the wall

Desmo has the perfect balance. He's kind, sensitive, looks after me but at the same time he's his own person and if he thinks I'm wrong he'll tell me !

You should never change who you are .. you'll find someone who does love for you who you are

kitten_caboodle · 26 Jun 2006 at 12:59

Piggymon said:
I don't believe you can be too nice at all !

I've never ever gone for the bad boys .. never been at all interested. Some guys who I thought were nice treated me badly but i've never intentionally gone for a bad one

You should never change who you are .. you'll find someone who does love for you who you are

^^^
what she said.

cleanbluesky · 26 Jun 2006 at 13:01

Piggymon said:
Desmo has the perfect balance. He's kind, sensitive, looks after me but at the same time he's his own person and if he thinks I'm wrong he'll tell me !

I like to think I am like this. I'm kind sensitive but not afraid to push her into the pit and shout "It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again" if she gets too big for her boots

I know, I'm bad :mad:

Priapus · 26 Jun 2006 at 13:03

spike's said:
cheers mate, has helped me put things in to perspective. just need to find that girl now. i am getting to old for this crap now.

No problem. Good luck with the search and don't stress too much about it, it isn't worth the hassle. Trust me, I've been down that road many times, and eventually took my head out of the clouds and did something about it. Look where I am today?

kitten_caboodle · 26 Jun 2006 at 16:27

cleanbluesky said:
I like to think I am like this. I'm kind sensitive but not afraid to push her into the pit and shout "It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again" if she gets too big for her boots

I know, I'm bad

What if she gets hold of your precious though??

Scott Salisbury · 26 Jun 2006 at 16:34

Piggymon said:
I don't believe you can be too nice at all !

I've never ever gone for the bad boys .. never been at all interested. Some guys who I thought were nice treated me badly but i've never intentionally gone for a bad one

On the other hand I couldn't be with a guy who was like a puppy dog, never disagreed with me and was a wet blanket .. that would drive me up the wall

Desmo has the perfect balance. He's kind, sensitive, looks after me but at the same time he's his own person and if he thinks I'm wrong he'll tell me !

You should never change who you are .. you'll find someone who does love for you who you are

Oh there's hope for me yet

Oakesy2001uk · 26 Jun 2006 at 17:01

Scott Salisbury said:
Oh there's hope for me yet

doubt it, as girls (IMO) seem to have the worst vision when it comes to filtering out the **** heads, when we (manly men) could decide that within 3.5 seconds of meeting them, but girls seem determined to find out the hard way, most dont aim to find the **** holes, Ive given up telling them now! I see it so often with my girlfriends mates, dont worry there are decent none thick girls out there and you will have the common sense to treat her right when she comes along, it only takes one :-)

Dont let that put you off experimenting whilst you try and find her though, no point in waiting

My view is you could meet her when your 16 or you could meet her when you 50, you could waste the chance, or you could grab it with both hands. Even if you waste it, annother will come along soon enough. There is no such thing as the perfect girl/guy, but the will be a few who are close enough.

Zip · 27 Jun 2006 at 13:14

Well i just told a girl i have feelings for that i have feelings for her........

......but she doesnt want a relationship at the moment and doesnt find the need for one.

That will be bloody right

At least she came out with it straight away and didnt lead me on

thebrasso · 27 Jun 2006 at 13:22

I'm one of the nice guys I'd say, and I'd always felt like I was being overlooked because girls went for the idiots who ended up treating them like ****. Something became clear to me. Every relationship I'd been with a girl who I had to be different around to be accepted. Usually it couldn't last long because you can't change your opinions or just who you are.

Then two weeks ago I threw caution to the wind and asked a girl out who I've known for quite a while. It turned out she liked me as much as I liked her. Its great

For the first time things are going steady and I've not rushed into things, and I can be as silly as I want really and she will usually outdo me. For the win.