Driving to work I had a Nihilistic moment.

[easyrider]

I was up at 5.30 am....had breakfast, watched a bit of breakfast TV...Had a shower...Drank some more tea.

I then left the house and drove the 15 miles along country lanes to work.

About 10 minutes in a had a sudden overpowering feeling of Nihilism.

I thought to myself, what the point? why am I doing this same thing again and again and again? For a moment my life and existence was totally and utterly pointless.

It reminded me of Sisyphus...

What is it about your life that resembles Sisyphus' plight? What is your relationship to your rock? Is the struggle itself enough for you? Would you describe pushing a rock up a hill heaven, hell, or something in between?

I guess the key is to try and not think about it.

 

[easyrider]

Get a job you enjoy and doesn't involve getting up at 5.30am

Thats the thing. I start at 9 am. I have been getting up early to alter my routine.

I don't hate my job either. But I don't hate sex...But doing it everyday over and over becomes tiresome

 

[easyrider]

I've had this a lot recently. I think it's to do with not enjoying work. If your work is your passion then you probably wouldn't feel this way.

Taken from: The Myth of Sisyphus by Albert Camus

"If this myth is tragic, that is because its hero is conscious. Where would his torture be, indeed, if at every step the hope of succeeding upheld him? The workman of today works every day in his life at the same tasks, and this fate is no less absurd. But it is tragic only at the rare moments when it becomes conscious. Sisyphus, proletarian of the gods, powerless and rebellious, knows the whole extent of his wretched condition: it is what he thinks of during his descent. The lucidity that was to constitute his torture at the same time crowns his victory. There is no fate that cannot be surmounted by scorn."

Camus presents Sisyphus's ceaseless and pointless toil as a metaphor for modern lives spent working at futile jobs in factories and offices. "The workman of today works every day in his life at the same tasks, and this fate is no less absurd. But it is tragic only at the rare moments when it becomes conscious."

 

[easyrider]

From Steve Job's Stanford University speech 2015:

But change what?

Another JOB? That requires the same rock pushing over and over again?

 

[easyrider]

 

[easyrider]

So the key is to embrace the absurd and avoid committing philosophical suicide.

Whether it be religion or consumerism.

 

[easyrider]

i think you need to sort your life out. Both inner and outer.

But surely this is the whole point?

How can one sort out chaos ?

To actually "kid" oneself that anything can be sorted out is committing philosophical suicide.

The construct of the Inner and Outer means what exactly?

 

[easyrider]

What a good thread!

We all have these moments unless we are incredibly lucky. Some of us have them once in a blue moon, for some of us they from part of our daily thought process, not least if you feel trapped in a going nowhere life. Life has shown me there is no one answer fits all as we are all different, with different aspirations and comfort levels. The interesting thing is I know people who are multiple millionaires and they too ask themselves "what am I doing this for" often, so don't see money as the solution to everything, it rarely is.

Life has also shown me however that for most people it's all under your control and the feeling trapped (work, home, family) is all under your control. Doesn't mean the decisions are not MASSIVELY hard sometimes, but it is under your control and if you are willing to accept that then todays drive was life affirming. It helps if you know what good and satisfaction to you looks like, which will also change as you age.

Write a list, write down what's crap, what's good and what you need to do. That will fix nothing but if you don't know what's crap and what's good you're going to struggle to get out of the negativity. Most people put money (lack of) on their list high up but I'd urge you not to. I have and continue to earn very well by most measures, but I am no longer chasing the dollar and I see it purely as a mechanism to clear the decks of debt so I am 100% debt free (which I am pretty much bar a mortgage, which is reducing nicely). Get to that point and your options are very different I feel if part of your goal in life is to remove need to service others. My focus is removing pressure from work life and building towards retirement as I close on 50 (next year). I also want to travel more, spend time seeing stuff, learning more about my passions and doing something with a group of like minded friends as my daily job.

I think if I get to that point then my life will be good as long as I maintain physical and mental health. Any curved balls along the way, there will be many, I will just deal with as best I can. One thing life has shown me sadly, is most people are not really that happy and I am somewhat envious of those who are but in the same way their happiness is rarely something i'd be happy with. Doesn't have to be that way, life is hard but you can change it, it's in all our powers to do so, just bloody hard.

I don't think I'm unhappy though and I don't hate my job.

The whole point of Sisyphus was that he was conscious of his plight..

Camus states:

"The lucidity that was to constitute his torture at the same time crowns his victory. There is no fate that can not be surmounted by scorn."

What I'm trying to say is that no amount of changing things will result in anymore happiness once you have the sudden realisation its all pointless.

Its this rejection of meaning that in reality makes us free..And that is what scared me for a moment. The mere fact 99% of the time we distract ourselves with stuff (religion,things, money,power etc) enables us to function

But in reality we are not functioning at all. We are just existing with a deluded sense of meaning to our world. This meaning providing us with perceived essence.

 

[easyrider]

I'm sure I'll work it out. But I just feel like I'll never get the upper hand in this situation and I'll always be on the back foot while others seemingly get on with their lives happily and easily.

That is the illusion. All the things you have mentioned are material shackles that can easily be dealt with.

Just get rid.

Most people I know who are in these perceived relationships are either making compromises to often to keep the peace or utterly miserable.

My sister is happy to work part time in a flower shop while her husband goes to work around the country. She's happy with her EastEnders and strictly and Celeb big brother.

This philosophical suicide is keeping her in check.

I'm guilty of it. I buy guitars...I commit philosophical suicide buy consumerism. I have to many guitars, I'm deluding myself the fruits of my labour mean anything by buying stuff I don't need.

I want a new GT86..I have a BMW with nothing wrong with it.But creating meaning in the job I do that allows me to even ponder such purchases is utterly pointless its own right.

In reality its all meaningless and tragic. But 99% of the time I'm not aware of this...

 

[easyrider]

Just do what makes you happy,

That in itself is illusion.

According to Aristotle, happiness consists in achieving, through the course of a whole lifetime, all the goods — health, wealth, knowledge, friends, etc. — that lead to the perfection of human nature and to the enrichment of human life. This requires us to make choices, some of which may be very difficult. Often the lesser good promises immediate pleasure and is more tempting, while the greater good is painful and requires some sort of sacrifice.

Aristotle would be strongly critical of the culture of “instant gratification” which seems to predominate in our society today. In order to achieve the life of complete virtue, we need to make the right choices, and this involves keeping our eye on the future, on the ultimate result we want for our lives as a whole. We will not achieve happiness simply by enjoying the pleasures of the moment. Unfortunately, this is something most people are not able to overcome in themselves. As he laments, “the mass of mankind are evidently quite slavish in their tastes, preferring a life suitable to beasts”

I'm sometime embarrassed at my consumerism in the pursuit of happiness...

 

[easyrider]

I had that exact same realisation 3 years ago and saying a big **** *** to work was an awesome day at the office!

I'm now half way through year two of a degree

Iv'e done that before...I walked into work...Come tea break at 10 am I had resigned and 3 months Later I was doing a degree at university.

Its when you get the good paid job after you graduate that traps you

 

[easyrider]

With work it really depends on the ethos of the company.. And colleagues.. I've worked at some horrible soul destroying places..

I'm not really talking about work...I'm talking about existence really.

 

[easyrider]

Yeah, work. It seems work is the be all and end all for some, and I can think of nothing more depressing. I have a great hobby, which involves me running around like a little kid, and getting blind drunk with like minded individuals, some of whom have very high powered jobs. Enjoy life, it's fleeting.

What hobby is that ?

 

[easyrider]

I think the "live to work" is something of a British/US mentality. I don't think they suffer from that in Greece

I've been out of work now for about 10 months (after being laid off), and I'm fine with that as I have enough savings to last me ages. But people I know don't hide the fact that they don't approve; most limit themselves to asking how the job hunting is going, but several people have flat up told me they think it's disgusting that I'm not working. "Plan on ever going back to work, do you?"

There is this mentality here that you should work every week of your life for 65-70 years - and if you don't you're a bad person.

How much savings ?

 

[easyrider]

Reenacting. It's mad!

Pics?

 

[easyrider]

That bad is it?

You know if I was working in China or whatever for 16 hours a day for 1 dollar I really would want to drive my car into a wall.

Not that I could afford a car mind you. People forget how good they've got it.

I think you've missed the point completely

 

[easyrider]

Probably. I'm grouchy atm

Once you realise it's all pointless you have nothing to be grouchy about.

Embrace the absurd and be free

 

[easyrider]

You watched Naked Lunch recently?

Not recently no?

 

[easyrider]

But we are all stuck here until we die. Struggling with the idea of our existing and allowing the chaos to take hold of our lives, just leads to more chaos.

So the only thing left to do, is strap your bullet proof vest on, pick up your gun and get ready for war!

The reaper will come calling when it's time for each of us. But until that moment give it your best shot.

It's the only thing that gives our insignificance, significance.

Nicely put...

 

[easyrider]

Oh what, everyone that posted my life is bad ******** should be ashamed of themselves. Whiny bitches every single one of you,......life is precious, you only get one so make it count. Enjoy the little things, appreciate how privileged you are driving to work in a car from your house with water and heating and a fridge to your job before returning to use your home PC and internet connection. There are many folk less fortunate so try your best to meaningful life.

Feel free to hit yourself with your keyboard repeatedly for a good 5 minutes before turning over a new leaf and living like responsible men.

And committing philosophical suicide is making it count?

Enjoying little things is making it count? Stuff like the internet and computers are making it count?

Material possessions are making it count?

I'm sorry but you delusion is bursting at the seams...The whole point of existence is to feel it...be it...question it...think it...

All you are doing is looking after yourself...and smothering yourself with fluff to keep yourself in check.

Your response to life is to block any real experience with distraction.

"Sisyphus, knows the whole extent of his wretched condition: it is what he thinks of during his descent. The lucidity that was to constitute his torture at the same time crowns his victory. There is no fate that can not be surmounted by scorn.