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If I cried every time I was unhappy about work then I'd never get anything else done 
Emotions in the workplace
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Soldato
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I think most people end up crying when their manager starts laying into them for ******** reasons, because it's supposedly no longer acceptable to just lamp the **** and then **** off down the pub until he wakes up, realises he was talking out of his blue-sky backside, and at the end of the day needs to go on a journey to move his goalposts before he touches base with you again!
Caporegime
I'm almost certain this is the response some of these people want. I've seen joy in the faces of managers who've wound people up to the point it's easy to get them fired.
Reminds me of a time I saw an MD's arse drop at a Christmas party. Thought it would be a good idea to ridicule this lad in front of everyone after we'd all had a few beers, lad offered him outside and you could see his entire demeanour change. Within an hour he'd got a taxi home, the lad got the boot not long after but he wasn't someone you'd want to **** off, came from a council estate but had a brain (and a temper!).
Soldato
As others have said, I'd argue that the type of manager who publicly belittles employees in front of everyone are in less control of their emotions than the employee who cries afterwards.
When I worked in various call centre environments, people (women, to be fair) would cry on a regular basis, as some customers are just absolute ***** who take out all of their issues on defenceless people at the end of a phone.
I almost envy people who cry and then get on with it, as they get to release a wave of emotion and calm themselves down. As a 'typical' male, I'm guilty of bottling it all up and suppressing emotions, which I don't think is hugely healthy.
When I worked in various call centre environments, people (women, to be fair) would cry on a regular basis, as some customers are just absolute ***** who take out all of their issues on defenceless people at the end of a phone.
I almost envy people who cry and then get on with it, as they get to release a wave of emotion and calm themselves down. As a 'typical' male, I'm guilty of bottling it all up and suppressing emotions, which I don't think is hugely healthy.
That happened at a place I worked, but the other way around! IIRC the MD was briefly prepared to offer around 10k to get the guy to keep quiet about it, though realistically it was witnessed by too many people, one of whom was also quite senior and was straight on the phone to an exec. I had to help drag them apart. Felt very odd, as a 20-something-year-old, to have to shove a middle-aged man into a wall and say "leave it and go home you ****ing idiot", especially when he was, at the time, my manager's manager!
Never really saw him again after that, just briefly saw him picking up stuff from his office desk early in the morning days later. Few of us had to go to HR and give a full account of it, we had e-mails sent in the early hours of the morning asking us to go straight to HR the moment we got into the office the next day, whoever the exec was that got phoned he'd gotten onto the global head of HR + London HR and people had clearly had to be woken up and got out of bed over this incident. MD was instantly suspended and obvs sacked after an investigation. The guy he'd got into a fight with was given a warning too for contributing to it, not walking away etc... but stayed employed as it was the MD who started swinging first.
Incidentally, a friend of mine, years later, spotted the guy in a well-known bank, looking slightly sheepish when he recognised my friend. God knows what actually happened behind the scenes, I think he was somehow "sacked" without officially being sacked/told to resign promptly so HR could just make the problem disappear, I as I don't think guys at that level tend to get sacked. No doubt he must have later told the new employer some yarn about early retirement and then wanting to take on a new challenge after laying low for a couple of years.
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I've cried 5 times that I can remember at work, four times were unrelated to work (family health/death issues), the one that was work related was when I was explaining to HR why I'd resigned.
Crying might be 'unprofessional' but it's not that easy to control. Two of the occasions I cried I was completely taken by surprise as I didn't feel particularly sad and wasn't expecting to cry.
You also don't know what people are going through outside of what you see, a lady's tears might be triggered by some bad feedback but it could be she was emotionally at tipping point already due to factors in her personal life. Her stress bucket could have been at 90% already and that pushed her over the edge, on another day she might not have cried.
Crying might be 'unprofessional' but it's not that easy to control. Two of the occasions I cried I was completely taken by surprise as I didn't feel particularly sad and wasn't expecting to cry.
You also don't know what people are going through outside of what you see, a lady's tears might be triggered by some bad feedback but it could be she was emotionally at tipping point already due to factors in her personal life. Her stress bucket could have been at 90% already and that pushed her over the edge, on another day she might not have cried.
I've generally kept emotions to myself at work - seen a few instances:
Came across my previous line manager broke down in tears on the stairs - her boss and his boss were pretty obnoxious towards her and they'd been particularly overbearing that day - she then went on long term sick for several months with depression, etc. by the time she came back they'd moved on. Had no idea how to deal with that.
Saw another women I worked with in floods of tears after she cheated on her husband with another colleague and then came into work to find he'd lost interest in her :s
Back at the start of the pandemic had another colleague on the verge of a breakdown as they had no idea how much risk or not they might be putting their elderly parents at by coming into work.
Fortunately not had to do that - had quite an odd one at a colleagues wedding do when my normally very professional manager turned up off his face on something and spent most of the evening boasting about how much money he made - was quite embarrassed about it the next day.
Came across my previous line manager broke down in tears on the stairs - her boss and his boss were pretty obnoxious towards her and they'd been particularly overbearing that day - she then went on long term sick for several months with depression, etc. by the time she came back they'd moved on. Had no idea how to deal with that.
Saw another women I worked with in floods of tears after she cheated on her husband with another colleague and then came into work to find he'd lost interest in her :s
Back at the start of the pandemic had another colleague on the verge of a breakdown as they had no idea how much risk or not they might be putting their elderly parents at by coming into work.
Fortunately not had to do that - had quite an odd one at a colleagues wedding do when my normally very professional manager turned up off his face on something and spent most of the evening boasting about how much money he made - was quite embarrassed about it the next day.
Deleted member 66701
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Deleted member 66701
I think it more likely your colleagues would have have sympathy for you and thought your manager was a t**t! If that had have happened to me or my team when I worked at HP we'd have walked out.
But meh, maybe empathy is a dying emotional skill these days.
People are emotional, it's just a matter of how well you hide it.
The best leaders and managers can keep control of their emotions in any situation. Most people will slip up occasionally, more so the more inexperienced and junior they are...but it's also largely down to people's neurological makeup.
Having Asperger's I find a real benefit as a manager...other people's emotions are a quite abstract thing so I'm good at dealing calmly with people who may be losing their ****.
I certainly don't look down on women that cry in the workplace. It's no different to a guy that gets so angry they flip out. Different people, different reactions.
The best leaders and managers can keep control of their emotions in any situation. Most people will slip up occasionally, more so the more inexperienced and junior they are...but it's also largely down to people's neurological makeup.
Having Asperger's I find a real benefit as a manager...other people's emotions are a quite abstract thing so I'm good at dealing calmly with people who may be losing their ****.
I certainly don't look down on women that cry in the workplace. It's no different to a guy that gets so angry they flip out. Different people, different reactions.
I had a old school production manager who mains purpose in life was to make people cry. He saw it as a sign of weakness. He threatened to take me outside once as I wouldn't cave in to his whims, was very funny at the time.
I personally do not mind emotion in the workplace, their is a time and a place for it though, hell I even cried at my desk once whilst listening to a audio book
I personally do not mind emotion in the workplace, their is a time and a place for it though, hell I even cried at my desk once whilst listening to a audio book
Associate
All human , so cant be avoided unfortunately. I had once a breakdown due to family news. I have not come off against anything i would term excessive display.