My dad also died at the age of 54 but I guess in a way I was lucky because technically to me/us he died earlier than that with his first stroke so we got the 'luck' of being eased into it.
No doubt about it, its gunna be hard but how you deal with it will help those closest deal with it to, I'm not saying man up.. no far from it, cry if you need to but just make sure you're there for them to as right now thats whats most important and I can bet that is exactly what your dad would do if the roles were reversed
You'll be thinking the word "Probably" and "If" a lot now.. like I thought, "Probably when my dad (who was a mechanic) asked me to change his car tyre, that something was going wrong" but thats what dads do for us.. and the gits are so good at not needing help that you just can't see it coming.
I did a speech at my dads funeral and as he'd had a few strokes already, he had already stated a few things that were to happen at the funeral.. one was no black suits and such, come in your everydays.. so I wore a top that had an arrow on pointing to the side that said "He loves the malechicken --->"
So the speech went like this, these were my brief notes I took with me and ad libbed most of it but this is roughly what I said.. as a side note, my dad was an overt atheist.. just for the record.. but funnily enough, the night before he died, he told the nurses he saw "jesus" hold the hand of the old man in the bed near him and walk away.. the next morning that guy had died. Though that could have been any number of rational explanations.. aswell as my dad after one of the strokes was so out of it, he thought there was an underground network of drug trafficking under the hospital and wanted me to get my mates dad (a copper) to launch a full scale operation! Ahh.. even in his haze he was a bit of a joker
Speech:
Hi everyone, I'm not very good at speeches and talking about people and im going to keep this short
so.. im simon, im his oldest son.. im adopted.. nah im just kidding.. martin is *points at little brother*.
jesus christ... man isnt that guy gunna be ****ed about meeting my dad?
i know what you're thinking.. you're thinking this guy definately didnt get his looks and thank **** for that eh, what I did get though was his sense of humour and I think thats the best way to remember him.
i can see some of you are quite upset and i understand why but you know he would want you to be happy, he'd call you a silly boy or a silly girl.. then you'd probably tell him to shut up you old ****, go put your teeth back in.. cut your hair maybe
ive only said a little, he'd hate that ive said this much about him already so im gunna change it onto his lovely wife, sue, who has done an amazing job caring for him since he had his first stroke but I got to ask you all.. you know that in the english language the shortest sentance is "I am", with dad do you think he'd agree that the longest sentance was "I do"?
so in with keeping it short he did have a final request, he wanted you all to know that "the old gits gone, you're not getting a free feed on him and after the musics done... you can all **** off home"
*two fingers to gathering*
When I read it back it seems very "you had to be there" but it made more sense at the time..
If thats offended you I apologize but hopefully you had a giggle and I'm sorry for your loss bud
