Harsh!

Arcade Fire · 15 May 2006 at 12:34

Haha, this email was just sent out to all of the Economics students at uni. I like it when people in positions of power display unparalleled sarcasm!

Code:

Dear Students,

I gather that some of you have been partying in Computer Room 2
over the weekend.

I hope you had a nice time with all the food and drink you consumed
- oh, and one of you even left contact lenses.  Please come and
collect them from my office (Room 7).

I was under the foolish impression that I was dealing with adults who
know  that when there are signs that say 'No food or drink' it means
just that.  Or perhaps you simply haven't matured into decent young
people.

The reason why we do not allow food and drink into the computer
room is because of the potential damage you can do to the
computers.   If this is a difficult concept for you to understand, then
please do come and see me, and I'll explain it to you in simple terms
that even economists can understand.

I wonder how many of you can work out this formula:

                 S + C + F + D = close down

(Answer: Students plus Computers plus Food plus Drink equals a
closing down of the computer room)  YOUR CHOICE.

VeNT · 15 May 2006 at 12:36

owned

lozza23_uk · 15 May 2006 at 12:37

well one person s gonna get a slapping, the person that needs their contacts back.

Nismo · 15 May 2006 at 12:37

I wouldnt like to see the state of whoever sent that's car at the end of the day

Zip · 15 May 2006 at 12:37

Ive never heard of a case where someone has killed a computer with food or a drink.
That whole thing is Myth i tell thee

DarkShadow · 15 May 2006 at 12:37

AJUK · 15 May 2006 at 12:37

Love it!

Mat · 15 May 2006 at 12:39

I hope you're not thinking of doing such things in Trinitys computer rooms...

lordrobs · 15 May 2006 at 12:41

Ah computers in places of education....

I work in schools as part of my job and I love the over reaction of the techy people- "OMFG A PACKET OF CHEESE AND ONION..... THE MATRIX IS GONNA CRASH AND WE'RE ALL DOOMED YOU NOOBS. ROXXOR *lots of other geek works I don't understand*"

iCraig · 15 May 2006 at 12:41

Computers are tough things.. the ones at my school survived bananas being shoved into the CD drives and mars bars left on the heatsink.

Goksly · 15 May 2006 at 12:45

we eat and drink in the computer room all the time. unless some twoddle places a drink ontop of the case, it would take a very harsh set of events to damage a computer.

jpmonkey69 · 15 May 2006 at 12:46

lordrobs said:
Ah computers in places of education....

I work in schools as part of my job and I love the over reaction of the techy people- "OMFG A PACKET OF CHEESE AND ONION..... THE MATRIX IS GONNA CRASH AND WE'RE ALL DOOMED YOU NOOBS. ROXXOR *lots of other geek works I don't understand*"

You may not realise this with your crisp oil coated fingers, but SOME of us like to use a keyboard + mouse that isn't all greasy and minging from the person who used it before.

Funnily enough, the reason letters and numbers get worn off keyboards quickly is because of S+C+C = LPOK

Its that same as you saying please don't eat in my car... I don't want chips everywhere.

It's not like I got in your car to throw chips around in the first place, and tbh, it may NEVER happen at all... but it can, and might.

LRC + C + S = ALR :eek:

lordrobs · 15 May 2006 at 12:52

jpmonkey69 said:
You may not realise this with your crisp oil coated fingers, but SOME of us like to use a keyboard + mouse that isn't all greasy and minging from the person who used it before.

Funnily enough, the reason letters and numbers get worn off keyboards quickly is because of S+C+C = LPOK

Then the miserable techy tool can come out of his little techy safe house and clean them. It would give him something to do with his day rather than just sitting on the internet then complaining when he has to do something

Crisps was probably a bad example as a greasy keyboard is nasty but its the same reaction no matter what the poor kid is consuming.

"OMFG A PANDA POP. ARE YOU INSANEORZ. WE COULD ALL GET FRAGGED TO HELLZ. I'M GOING BACK TO MY 1337 OFFICE TO LOOKS AT SOME MORE PR0N."

Maybe its just the techy's I've had dealings with that are like this, I don't know.

MoLt3h · 15 May 2006 at 12:55

Zip said:
Ive never heard of a case where someone has killed a computer with food or a drink.
That whole thing is Myth i tell thee

Haven't killed a computer...but spilled J20 all over my keyboard and tried to dry it out with a hair dryer to prevent it getting sticky....melted all the keys *d'oh*

jpmonkey69 · 15 May 2006 at 12:59

lordrobs said:
Then the miserable techy tool can come out of his little techy safe house and clean them. It would give him something to do with his day rather than just sitting on the internet then complaining when he has to do something

Crisps was probably a bad example as a greasy keyboard is nasty but its the same reaction no matter what the poor kid is consuming.

"OMFG A PANDA POP. ARE YOU INSANEORZ. WE COULD ALL GET FRAGGED TO HELLZ. I'M GOING BACK TO MY 1337 OFFICE TO LOOKS AT SOME MORE PR0N."

Maybe its just the techy's I've had dealings with that are like this, I don't know.

Being in 3rd line and architecture, I'm lucky enough to not have to deal with the Proles anymore

fini · 15 May 2006 at 13:02

Arcade Fire said:
I like it when people in positions of power display unparalleled sarcasm!

as do I

....and before some idiot e-mails me back to ask; NO, you DON'T HAVE to do an essay question. For some reason, especially at this time of the year, you lot seem to delight in circulating vicious rumours to the effect that we have either been lying to you, or we forgot to mention in the handbook that the Tort exam has to be written in an obscure dialect of Mandarin or perhaps simply that we have changed our mind since last week without bothering to tell anyone. You can choose to believe me about the exam or you can choose to believe your friend. In making your choice, however, you might just want to consider which one of us actually wrote the exam.

This is just from the first e-mail I picked from the lecturer who wrote the above - every e-mail from him/her is like this - always gives me something to laugh about.

fini

AJUK · 15 May 2006 at 13:04

In making your choice, however, you might just want to consider which one of us actually wrote the exam.

THere is just no arguing with that. LOL.

Vonhelmet · 15 May 2006 at 13:40

It's simpler to forbid people from having food and drink near computers than it is to replace keyboards etc when people pour stuff into them. QED.

kdd · 15 May 2006 at 14:00

Zip said:
Ive never heard of a case where someone has killed a computer with food or a drink.
That whole thing is Myth i tell thee

A few years ago i had a temp job in an office and they were 100% uber strict enforcing there being no food or drink at the workstations to prevent computer damage, there were signs all over the place and managers would always be reminding you of the rules. One day i was really thirsty so i thought sod it and took a cup of tea to my desk, which 10 seconds later i knocked with a binder spilling tea all over the keyboard which stopped working and the front of the computer. I couldn't believe it tbh.

Yas786 · 15 May 2006 at 14:09

Hehe i like it, reminds me of the time when i sent out a very harsh email to my staff and it was very sarcastic to say the least. Suffice to say 3 of them left..good riddance i say and the others apologised for what they did. Im not going to say exactly what they did but put it this way it was a sackable offence according to my company's policy and in my books.

But i do love sarcasm especially when its done really well and 2 fingers up to the people who say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit