Has anyone withdrawn their child from collective worship?

chris.tarry85 · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:31

We have an awful C of E rector at the moment - the full telling 5 year old to repent their sins, burning in hell speech.

He has, in the course of a year changed our daughter from regularly (of her own free will) going to a lunchtime JAM club (Jesus & Me) to thinking that God is scary!

I therefore want to withdraw them from the church led worship, but leave them in the teacher led RE classes to ensure they get a balanced view of other religions too.

Has anyone done this before?

BDEE · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:40

Sounds like a change of school is more in order to me.

Also in before in lock....

doofer · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:44

You're not happy with the Brain-Washing your child is receiving? Why subject them to it in the first place?

Nix · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:46

Honestly, in my opinion, the concept of original sin and instilling of fear into children so young is incredibly damaging. It's the sort of thing that will manifest itself into neurosis as they grow up.

At the end of the day, you're their parent, so the decision lies with you.

Let's not turn this into a religion bashing thread, please.

Uncle Petey · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:49

Sorry.

JAM club

Kenai · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:49

Ask yourself what you feel they'd lose out on were you to withdraw them.

The answer is probably very little, as even the pro religious would struggle to justify it if the child is clearly only picking up negatives.

Steedie · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:52

My dad sent a letter to my school telling them I'm not to take part in Religious education because it got a bit too preachy. In hindsight, it was a bit of a dick move by my dad to take that choice away and maybe a little drastic too, but at the time I loved the free period

Raumarik · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:53

Atheist here - Got no problem with my daughter getting the whole shebang at my local primary, she can make up her own mind if she wants to be religious - just as my catholic parents did with me.

Just as I hate seeing people force their kids to be religious, I don't see why I have a right to force her not to be. Plus there are a few moral lessons to be learnt from it AND the nativity play was a lot of fun for her. I don't see the harm to be honest as it's getting her into discussions with us about religion.

Have to say though her school isn't religious, it's not like the catholic schools I attended, it's way more laid back than that.

Steveocee · 1 Feb 2016 at 20:59

Could you not move her to a club where the leader isn't so scary?

Hades · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:01

My daughter recently had a religious studies test. When she told me she came bottom of the class I was so proud of her

stewski · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:02

Hades said:
My daughter recently had a religious studies test. When she told me she came bottom of the class I was so proud of her

+1

Sliver · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:03

As her parent, you are the person she looks to for anything more than any other authority figure. So I'd talk with her and discuss where the C of E school preaching is wrong and where evidence based reasoning and critical thinking is right. As she matures, I'm sure she'll quickly see organised religion for what it is. A falsehood.

scorza · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:11

Have you tried talking to the school about your concerns?

adolf hamster · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:23

Ask her if she wants to leave, and if so then take the issue up with the school.

Whilst in my younger years i did get taken to church it faded away and tbh given my dad isn't religious, my mum ended up a bhuddist and i'm a born again pastafarian i can see why now.

I do wish i'd been given the choice to avoid re though, as much as i know a fair bit of random trivia about christianity (know thy enemy i like to think) i really dont think a kid should have to put up with it if they dint want to.

chris.tarry85 · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:23

Just to be clear, it's not a club I have an issue with, it is the whole school assembly's, church services etc.

I have no problem with RE teaching, as that is much more factual and from what I have seen gives a more balanced view however whatever this rector says, no 5 year old has sins that need to be forgiven!

Many parents have raised concerns about his ways (me included) but all to no avail.

dowie · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:26

sounds like a sensible move OP

they presumably have some alternative activity for the Jewish, Muslim, Hindu and Sikh kids when all the Christian stuff goes on so it shouldn't be hard for them to move your kid across to doing that

IIRC at my school (also a C of E one) the Jews etc... went to read/study in the library when we had religious assemblies

chris.tarry85 · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:29

dowie said:
sounds like a sensible move OP

they presumably have some alternative activity for the Jewish, Muslim, Hindu and Sikh kids when all the Christian stuff goes on so it shouldn't be hard for them to move your kid across to doing that

IIRC at my school (also a C of E one) the Jews etc... went to read/study in the library when we had religious assemblies

hahaha - this is a village school in Oxfordshire!

to be honest, I would rather then sit and read in the library from the 20 minutes twice a week they would miss.

dowie · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:32

chris.tarry85 said:
hahaha - this is a village school in Oxfordshire!

ah... the midlands is obviously a bit more diverse!

maybe if other parents are concerned then a group of kids could be self excluded from the preachy stuff - at least you've not then just got your kid alone in the library etc..

Freefaller · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:35

Halfmad said:
Atheist here - Got no problem with my daughter getting the whole shebang at my local primary, she can make up her own mind if she wants to be religious - just as my catholic parents did with me.

Just as I hate seeing people force their kids to be religious, I don't see why I have a right to force her not to be. Plus there are a few moral lessons to be learnt from it AND the nativity play was a lot of fun for her. I don't see the harm to be honest as it's getting her into discussions with us about religion.

Have to say though her school isn't religious, it's not like the catholic schools I attended, it's way more laid back than that.

Commendable attitude

chris.tarry85 · 1 Feb 2016 at 21:37

Freefaller said:
Commendable attitude

My concern is that this if this turns her away from religion it will be for the wrong reason.

I have absolutely no problem with whatever decision she wants to make, but wouldn't want her (or my son) to be left thinking this is what church is like, because it's not (or shouldn't be)