Help with car advertisement, too honest?! Modified Fiesta ST

i have to admit when reading it I got board and stoped because there was a lot of babbling, for me i dont want some ones life story just key facts
 
Howard said:
I would definitely put a fresh MOT on, it inspires more confidence in the car. I would also re-gas the AC, if that's really all that's required. tbh If I read "AC needs a re-gas" in an advert then to me it usually means that the AC doesn't blow cold and it's broken.

I'd also personally put it back to as standard as easily possible, cosmetically. A lot of that crap is only going to appeal to a small audience and if you turn it into a nice, tidy, fairly standard Fiesta ST then it'll appear to a wider audience. If I was buying one, I'd look at the pictures of yours and skip right past it without even reading the ad I'm afraid.
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scratch said:
Those black wheels would make me skip straight past your ad without even looking at the wording. You want top 'minter' money for your car but the pics immediately plant doubts in the buyers mind about how the car has been treated.

Yes it's narrow minded, but that's how it works with most people. Get the car back to standard as much as you can (and shorten the wording..I got bored half way through and the bits I did read didn't exactly make me think 'minter') take some new photos and I bet you'll get much more interest.
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Got to agree with these points as well. One of the first things I look for is MOT length. If it's less than 2 months, it just screams to me that the car is a shed and the buyer is trying to get rid before they have to spend a fortune getting it through the test.

And yes, your car does look like a bit of a Halfords special, even if it might not be ;)
 
Personally, I think that would sell better/quicker if you put the original wheels and suspension on it. Then you can lower the price a little and sell the mods to recoup some money. I'd potentially do the exhaust as well...

When selling a car that's been modified, you're instantly reducing the number of potential buyers.
 
For me it's the mot that'd be the issue. On such a common car (read lots of other options out there) doubt i'd phone about one that has 1 months MOT. Even if they (as you are) offered to MOT it - to get my call it'd have to have 12 months mot first.
 
If you want to sell it quickly I would drop the price (after fixing the aircon and a years MOT), a quick search of Autotrader and only 3 STs are more expensive with plenty of standard 2007 STs available for under 4k.
 
This has to be the worst advert for a car ever, huge case of TLDR.

A car advert (i have had loads of cars) needs to be short and simple. Dont mention the bad points unless they are absolute deal changers, you need to get the buyer to see it, its a private sale and its on them to do their own inspection.

You need:

Fiesta XXX ST 2008
Much loved example enthusiast owned
50000 miles
Full comprehensive service history
New MOT with no advisories
Taxed ready to drive away
Genuine <whatever> powder-coated alloys
<Whatever brand> high performance adjustable bells and whistles suspension
<Any other mods, overplay them as being really good>
The best example ever in the world, enthusiast and lovingly owned etc etc etc

Done :) That wordy advert is not necessary at all.
 
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I've got to say, I'm a car nerd but I have never cared so less about what kind of locking wheel nuts the car has or whether or not the car has had a new interior light surround.

Ill rewrite your ad when I get a moment and you can use it/bits of it if you like it. Be aware though, those black alloys aren't doing you any favours. And if you still had the standard suspension now would be a good time to fit it.

Please also take some photos that aren't on an industrial estate. And put as many photos as you can up of the car. I can't tell you how annoying it is when people put up like 3 photos.

Here's a link to my ad from my car that just sold a couple of weeks ago. Unquestionably it's a bit wordy but with a car of that value and complexity it needed to have it included as they were important details the new owner would be wanting to know about such as turbo wastegates/water pumps. Not what kind of locking wheel nuts it had.

http://www.pistonheads.com/classifi...eries-e92-335i-se-with-m-sport-extras/2261864
 
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no way would i part with 5k for a fezzy, especially one with hardly any MOT or tax and no air con and noisy clutch and looks like a typical boy racers car that's been ragged everywhere.
 
Also if you want to advertise to the types of people that'd appreciate the modifications get it on pistonheads or somewhere like that i'd have said.
 
- Does it have FSH? It mentions something about a service book but never actually says FSH.
- I would remove the wind deflectors if you can and sell them separately.
- Is there any way you could raise the suspension to a more factory setting and take photos then?
- Put the "LED sidelights" back to normal ones. LED sidelights just look chavvy and crap.
 
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Gaygle said:
Does it have FSH? It mentions something about a service book but never actually says FSH
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Good point, and putting the mileage and date of most recent stamp isn't a bad thing (IMO).


The MOT thing wouldn't bother me per se, but I would probably chat with the owner and see if he's willing to put it through and MOT. So maybe state you're going to MOT it pre-sale?
 
Scottland said:
The MOT thing wouldn't bother me per se, but I would probably chat with the owner and see if he's willing to put it through and MOT. So maybe state you're going to MOT it pre-sale?
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Me neither, but the MOT thing would bother a lot of people though. For the sake of a £25 MOT at Halfords/Kwik Fit to give it a 12 month ticket it means another plus point for the car and increases the confidence a buyer will have in the car. He could state he's going to re-MOT it pre sale, or just advertise it with 12 months MOT now and get it done in the next couple of days.

Anyway, OP, my very quick attempt. Just get some new pictures of the car. Pictures sell a car.

Rewritten ad said:
2008 "58" Ford Fiesta ST - 2.0 16v 5 speed manual in Moondust Silver. This car comes as standard with the usual ST upgrades such as electric windows, mirrors, aircon, upgraded Sony CD/MP3 stereo and Sony speakers and the wonderful Ford heated windscreen plus more.

At a glance:
- Fantastic 2.0l Ford ST engine with the optimal blend of power and economy (40mpg+ is easily obtained)
- 53,000 miles
- Full Service History - it has all history present and I have a folder full of receipts for various items during my ownership.
- MOT until June 2015, Tax until July 2014
- Car is in excellent condition and has been extremely reliable
- 2 keys/fobs as from factory
- Lovely half leather interior which has been regularly cleaned
- Paintwork in excellent condition. Regularly washed, polished and waxed to keep it that way.
- Owned by myself for the passed XXX years with only 2 previous owners

Let me start by saying I am quite picky and aim for every car I own to be maintained to a very high standard. The car has always been serviced on time and has been looked after in all aspects without cost being an issue. Below is an outline of what service work has been carried out in just the last 10k miles:

- Full oil and oil filter change using Ford approved fully synthetic oil
- Fuel filter/air filter/cabin filter changed
- NGK iridium spark plugs
- Coolant change
- Rear drivers wheel bearing
- Gearbox oil/power steering fluid/brake fluid change using only the highest quality Ford approved Castrol products.
- Brand new upgraded EBC front crossdrilled/grooved discs and pads with Pagid rear discs and pads. All calipers were stripped and cleaned also.
- Matching Yokohama S Drive 195/45/16 Tyres (Fronts replaced recently and are almost new. Rears have lots of tread also)

In addition the car has also had a couple of subtle modifications to enhance the looks of it, to refine the drive and to make it just a bit more special than the other ST's on the road.

- Mountune cold air intake system & filter (Mountune are only Ford approved upgrade partner)
- Piper rear backbox and with non resonated centre section giving a subtle increase to the noise from the engine. This exhaust does not drone as is not anti-social or excessively loud in any way.
- Very expensive AP Racing adjustable coilover kit with all other parts of the suspension inspected and found to be in excellent order.
- Genuine Ford Fiesta 17" Zetec 7 Spoke alloys professionally refurbished in black
- Upgraded +120% H4 headlight bulbs
- ST500 upgraded interior

In summary, as can be seen, I have spent thousands of pounds (and many many hours!) on this car during my ownership to keep it in fantastic condition. It is well and truly up to date with it's servicing, comes with 4 premium tyres with loads of tread, has recently had all the brake discs and pads replaced, a full 12 months MOT and is freshly serviced. It even comes with some expensive upgrades also. All of this means the next owner will have absolutely nothing to worry about and will just be able to enjoy the vehicle.

I would not be selling this car unless I truly had to but unfortunately life has more important aspects to it than a nice car sitting outside.

Car is located in Stoke-on-Trent, West Midlands. Viewings by arrangement. Dave - 07815 077074
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If i'm totally honest, i would put whatever you could (especially the the alloys, suspension and exhaust back to standard if you could) and sell them separately where you'll get much better money.

Benefits of putting the car back to standard:
- Opens it up to a wider proportion of the market
- You'd be able to reduce the price of the car, further opening up the market
- Looks better to 99% of people
- No insurance implications for next buyer
- Get better money from selling the bits privately
- Presents it as being one which a well looked after fun road car
- Would not look like a barry boys wet dream with race this and race that and with photos taken on an industrial estate that the owner has likely spent most of their evenings wheel spinning with 16 year old girls sitting in the passenger seat.

Oh God, i think i'm stuck in bullet point mode.
 
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I'm with the above, far too much waffle.
Despite the mods at the end of the day it's a silver fiesta, how does the price compare to standard cars of similar age cost wise? that's the view a lot will have when viewing, see the massive list of waffle and sip tot he next silver fiesta.

Would you be better off selling mods and reverting car to stock?
 
Age, mileage, full mot and price.

The rest is down to the buyer to deduce.


Too much guff in the ad which basically says the cars perfect and then points out why it isn't.

Probably a tad high on the price too maybe?


Simplify and do what needs doing if you want full whack, which you very much most likely won't get, few people pay full asking.
 
I'll keep this as brief as I can as there's already far to much waffle in this thread.

You need to rewrite the advert & only list what is relevant, It's an advert not a story.
 
And please, please don't include the term race car.

We're English round here after all, so you do the math













s.

:p
 
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