I LIKE SCIENCE.

I put this one on here a while ago but I feel it's nerdy enough to be reborn;

Why do Java programmers need glasses?

Because they cant C#
 
whitecrook said:
I LIKE TURTLES.
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Gism0.jpg
 
Why did the quark get all the girls?
He had charm.

Why couldn't he put everything on his credit card?
He only had two thirds charge.

What is the chemical formula for dog urine?
K9P
 
Lightnix said:
Hooray, now that you've said that, I can now claim that all this time procrastinating on this forum was in fact invaluable revision for my Core 1 exam tomorrow! This is the best thread ever! :D
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I'll be extemely suprised if that comes up in your C1 exam dude! It's c3 stuff...
 
OK nerds, take notes:

Scientists are now able to absolutely prove that girls are evil.

Proof:

First, we all know that girls are the product of time and money:
GIRLS = (TIME) * (MONEY)
And as we all know time is money:
TIME = MONEY
Therefore: GIRLS = (MONEY) * (MONEY)
Which we rewrite: GIRLS = MONEY^2
Now we also know that money is the root of all evil:
MONEY = SQRT(EVIL)
Square both sides of the last equation:
MONEY^2 = EVIL
Compared with the last equation for GIRLS you get:
GIRLS = EVIL

Done.
 
Kappa said:
Lol but what about people who havent seen it yet :P

Quit ruining the illusion lol!
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i thought ninja edits were edits performed in the time frame before the forum adds the 'edited by' comment to the post, regardless if somebidy saw the original or not.

I guess it could be argued that it's only a ninja edit if this task is performed AND someone has seen the original post.
 
whitecrook said:
i thought ninja edits were edits performed in the time frame before the forum adds the 'edited by' comment to the post, regardless if somebidy saw the original or not.

I guess it could be argued that it's only a ninja edit if this task is performed AND someone has seen the original post.
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I tend to use it now when I'm blatantly wrong or have a 'fail' moment, typing out that it was a ninja edit helps me redeem myself :D
 
Rene Descartes was sitting at a bar. The bartender came over and asked if he would like another drink. He replied, "I think not." And he vanished.

Heisenburg was also sitting at the bar. After Descartes vanished in a puff of smoke, the bartender walked over to him and asked, "Did you see that?" To which Heisenberg replied, "I can't be certain."

The bartender then noticed Einstein was there. So he asked him if he could believe what had happened. Einstein replied, "It's all relative."

Then the bartender noticed that Carl Sagan was there. He walked over to him and asked, "Can you believe that all these famous people are here in THIS bar?" Sagan replied, "No. Why there must be BILLIONS and BILLIONS of bars out there."
 
simulatorman said:
A frontiersman went into an Indian village to purchase a wife.

The chief showed him three young women. The first was seated on a deer skin and could be purchased for the sum of five ponies. The second was seated on a buffalo skin and could also be purchased for five ponies. The third young woman was seated on a hippopotamus skin and could be purchased for ten ponies.

"Why does this one cost so much more?" asked the man.

"You know," replied chief Pythagoras, "the squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the sum of the squaws on the other two hides."
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Laughed so hard, I blew snot on my keyboard.

Nitefly said:
Science chat up line:

"Hey baby, if I was an enzyme, I'd be DNA helicase, so I could unzip your jeans ;)"
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"I wish I was your derivative, then I could lie tangent to your curves"
 
Why are chemists great for solving problems?
They have all the solutions.

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.

What do you do with dead chemists?
Barium.
 
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