I need your help.....

Zip said:
I see, You have big stock that doctors arnt used to :D
Good luck when it finally does decided to kick and head butt its way out :)
Click to expand...
Thanks :) However it is my wife who is going to do the suffering.
Our little girl was 3 feet 3 inches on her 2nd Birthday. She's a tall lass.
 
VIRII said:
Thanks :) However it is my wife who is going to do the suffering.
Our little girl was 3 feet 3 inches on her 2nd Birthday. She's a tall lass.
Click to expand...


How much did she weight when she came out?

I was a porker at 8 pounds 7 :cool:


It might not be wise to hold your wifes hand :p
 
firstly credit must be given to the fairly tight production for a clearly amateur attempt and for posting on a forum.

the beats far outstrip the lyrical content in all three pieces - you do not seem to know what type of rapper you are - clearly not a lyricist since you speak of no poetic content.

the first song was poor in my opinion - the rapping voice was out of tone, pace and pitch of the beat. pronounciation was dire and the lyrics are very atypical - so many rappers are doing this, and doing it better. indeed, so many rapper are doing real rhymes so you need to think about that. the beat composition was excellent and the flow improves in the middle. steretypical lyrics though -- eg.. i am tired of most mcs....

the second song had a fantastic arrangement and beat, again ruined by corny lyrics and much talk about nothing - references to alize, vip, top ballers... the voice is not really suited to the music and the pronounciation is poor yet again. the chorus is diabolical and out of tune and time. overall a much better attempt than in one, the flow is much better here.

the third attempt has a better match of your voice to the beat, decent flow, let down again by content.

overall your content is really poor and work needs to be done on your dialect and tone - not sure if you are putting on a rapping voice. you clearly sound african/british so why not keep it how it is rather than labouring over a fake tone. the beats, despite not being my cup of tea really are impressive.

overall judgement depends on where you are at and your hopes and aspirations for rapping.
 
cleanbluesky said:
Not a bad effort, vocals could have been higher in the mix.

I'm better your sense of timing has got better now... it's a bit 4/4 and on the beat

EDIT: I don't think its too on the beat actually, what it needs is a better structure from whoever wrote the music. You need a verse and chorus in there.

Korex eh?

I've got a few tracks with a good transition between verse/bridge/chorus... I wonder whether Mr Raz would be willing to rap over them if he isn't busy... I could edit out the vocals and some guitar bits of my tracks and hand them over. Might depend on what software Mr Raz is using
Click to expand...


Thanks.

I agree with what you said about the timing, i remember when i made it back then how some of my friends said it was off beat but i actually went over it but i cant seem to pin point where and when it went off beat. I also seem to become saturated when i listen to my own work during the editing period that i dont even know which is which anymore.

I would be happy to do some line over your back track if you dont mind, i currently run cubase and reason on a music pc...so hopefully all should work.
 
freshy said:
firstly credit must be given to the fairly tight production for a clearly amateur attempt and for posting on a forum.

the beats far outstrip the lyrical content in all three pieces - you do not seem to know what type of rapper you are - clearly not a lyricist since you speak of no poetic content.

the first song was poor in my opinion - the rapping voice was out of tone, pace and pitch of the beat. pronounciation was dire and the lyrics are very atypical - so many rappers are doing this, and doing it better. indeed, so many rapper are doing real rhymes so you need to think about that. the beat composition was excellent and the flow improves in the middle. steretypical lyrics though -- eg.. i am tired of most mcs....

the second song had a fantastic arrangement and beat, again ruined by corny lyrics and much talk about nothing - references to alize, vip, top ballers... the voice is not really suited to the music and the pronounciation is poor yet again. the chorus is diabolical and out of tune and time. overall a much better attempt than in one, the flow is much better here.

the third attempt has a better match of your voice to the beat, decent flow, let down again by content.

overall your content is really poor and work needs to be done on your dialect and tone - not sure if you are putting on a rapping voice. you clearly sound african/british so why not keep it how it is rather than labouring over a fake tone. the beats, despite not being my cup of tea really are impressive.

overall judgement depends on where you are at and your hopes and aspirations for rapping.
Click to expand...


I agree with what you said too, I initially didnt wanna put this out because of my accent - im worried it wont go down well. Im working on my pronounciation but i dont think it will completely go away. The lyrical content of things i talk about now is IMV way better than that now. Im gonna try and fix up a track over the bank holiday for you to hear if you want.

I dont know what it is but that's the way i talk in real life, most people think im trying to be phonny(sp?) by putting on an american accent of some sort but i dont. That's the way i talk....all of these kinda worries me.



Thanks again for you review.
 
If you become Rich and Famous i promise that you can put your money in my bank account so its kept nice and safe :)
 
ElRazur said:
Thanks.

I agree with what you said about the timing, i remember when i made it back then how some of my friends said it was off beat but i actually went over it but i cant seem to pin point where and when it went off beat. I also seem to become saturated when i listen to my own work during the editing period that i dont even know which is which anymore.

I would be happy to do some line over your back track if you dont mind, i currently run cubase and reason on a music pc...so hopefully all should work.
Click to expand...

I'll play around with the track and I have in mind and send it to you, not sure whether I will send it in Cubase or just an MP3 file, theres more flexilbity in Cubase...

With regards to the 'timing', I don't mean you have to be on the beat all the time. If you look at the absolute cream of musicians and singers they know when to be on the beat and when to be off the beat. Jazz is almost entirely about playing with the beat.
 
if that is how you speak stay true to it - i would recommend starting out with some slow beats and then accentuate words properly. if you know people that play acoustic guitar that is a superb way to really improve yourself.

don't worry about your accent but raise your voice and work on how you immerse words into the beat. nothing wrong with your accent, i don't want you to get the idea that i am carrying a grudge from previous disagreements. i am just dropping knowledge.

stay away from name dropping and the usual conventions of the percieved genre.

don't worry if you have an angle on what you say - be it humour, truth or story teliing your accent won't matter.
 
Not bad man. Personally i liked the 2nd one the most.

Pronounciation could be better i think? But a very good effort and much better than most people could do.

I think maybe you need a message to portray, in those i wasnt quite sure what it was... If you know what i mean, but im not expert :p .

Keep it up man.

edit: Agree with freshy, he seems to be saying what im trying to :D .
 
Blackstar said:
ob‧tuse–adjective
1. not quick or alert in perception, feeling, or intellect; not sensitive or observant; dull.
Click to expand...


Don't worry, it is his birthday soon. We can all buy him a dictionary ;) :D

quigley said:
I think maybe you need a message to portray, in those i wasnt quite sure what it was... If you know what i mean, but im not expert :p .
Click to expand...

Yep, like most rap it was pointless and did not appear to have any sort of message/meaning.
 
Raikiri said:
Don't worry, it is his birthday soon. We can all buy him a dictionary ;)
Click to expand...


You said that just as i was typing up a thread to ask for ideas :D :eek: :cool:

Have you been looking at my profile? :p
 
Raikiri said:
Yep, like most rap it was pointless and did not appear to have any sort of message/meaning.
Click to expand...

Ye, i see what you saying. I'd probably use 'some' rather than 'most' though.

I think what i mean is, it didnt jump out at me, or stand out in any way.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom