If your longterm partner cheated would you want to know?

JodieO

JodieO

JodieO

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Just watched the Jerry Springer show where they have to tell the truth and the man admitted to paying for sex whilst abroad and also that his wife wasn't the best lover he'd ever had :p Now I'm not sure I'd really want to know. Part of me would I think but as I would forgive it anyway it might be better to not know at all.

Apparently they're still together and working things out but the best bit was that he didn't even win any money! :p All that for nothing!

Saying that I haven't been cheated on during my marriage (to my knowledge) so should it happen I may feel differently.
 
Yes I would want to know. I can understand the "what you don't know won't hurt you" mentality but I feel a line needs to be drawn somewhere and this definitely exceeds that line.
 
Of course I'd want to know. If your partner cheats on you, it's a betrayal of trust and completely changes the basis of the relationship. There has to be something wrong for someone to cheat, and you can't do anything about that if you keep quiet.
 
Why you would use Jerry Springer as an example of this is beyond me, particularly since they have admitted making up stories for ratings in the past.

I would hope that my gf would be honest enough to tell me, and I would want to know if it did. I would forgive her since I do love her.

However I have had my previous gf cheat on me twice. Since the first time was the first time I had been cheated on I forgave her, however two months later I dumped her when she did it again.

If you've been with your partner for a long time and they tell you that they've cheated it would give you a wake up call to tell you that something is wrong with your relationship. I would rather get that call than go on blindly with a relationship that was going downhill without me knowing it.
 
I dunno really, if I found out then I'm almost sure the relationship would be over. Trust is so important to me and if I lost that I don't think the it would ever feel the same.

On the other hand the idea of being played for a fool and your partner living a lie is possibly more unsettling.

As hard as it would be I guess I would want to know
 
Yeggstry said:
Why you would use Jerry Springer as an example of this is beyond me, particularly since they have admitted making up stories for ratings in the past.

I would hope that my gf would be honest enough to tell me, and I would want to know if it did. I would forgive her since I do love her.

However I have had my previous gf cheat on me twice. Since the first time was the first time I had been cheated on I forgave her, however two months later I dumped her when she did it again.

If you've been with your partner for a long time and they tell you that they've cheated it would give you a wake up call to tell you that something is wrong with your relationship. I would rather get that call than go on blindly with a relationship that was going downhill without me knowing it.
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I only mentioned the Jerry Springer as I'd just watched it, I was stuck on the sofa with the baby asleep on me so wanted something inane to watch.

Does cheating mean that things will go downhill though? What if it were in the past and over with? If you had no problems anymore etc, would you still want to know then?
 
I've had it both ways before (from the same girl, actually!), neither way was easy.

good lord, that post could be misquoted!
 
JodieG said:
I only mentioned the Jerry Springer as I'd just watched it, I was stuck on the sofa with the baby asleep on me so wanted something inane to watch.

Does cheating mean that things will go downhill though? What if it were in the past and over with? If you had no problems anymore etc, would you still want to know then?
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If you had no problems any more and you found out you may end up having problems as before. It very much depends on the people involved in the situation, and also how recent the cheating occured.
 
that's a tough one isnt it, really. i guess yeah id always want to know. but what if they did it, regretted it and would never do it again? and what if it was in the past?


its one of those situations where you dont really know how you'd react until you were in it. or at least, i dont know.
 
Yes, so I can start moving my asssets out of her reach......just in case.

Seriously thou, of course I would, but take all situation into account, how old we are, what circumstances (1 nighter, fling, affair) and decide from there.

Relationship is nothing without trust.
 
Quite a lot of people have affairs/one night stands from what I've read so there must be a lot of people either forgiving or not knowing surely?
 
Dont know which is best to know or not to know, i think it was just a single one night stand then its probably best not to know.

on a similar note what would you do if you knew your father was having an affair , would you tell your mother?
 
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