Right, so you have clinical depression.. fair enough, yet are living a full life full of enjoyment ?, surely that's the biggest contradiction ever.
That's not what I said, though, is it?
Is my life complete and full of enjoyment? Well, I get by if that's what you mean. I have a wife that loves me, a decent job and enough hobbies at home to keep me busy/occupied. I have severe relapses, loss of temper, loss of patience, loss of will, and a mild dependence on alcohol for self medication. Occasionally I just stop and break down crying when I manage to get a few moments alone. Why? Nothing in particular. I'll sit in silence alone or I'll lie awake at night, staring at the ceiling trying to control my thoughts as they once again argue that there's just no point to getting up in the morning.
That's quite a common occurance.
Every single day is a battle within my own head -- I've posted experiences over the years in various OcUK threads, all of which have been well received and enlightening for some. At its worst, I've been a completely non-functioning, alcoholic wreck of a person just five minutes away from ending it all. If I'd had the balls, that is, which is a train of thought that perpetuates the vicious circle behind it all. I've stared into the face of Hell itself and managed to back away. Almost every minute of my life remains a fight to make sure I don't go back there again.
You, you just sound like a very bitter person who thinks anyone battling depression just sits around all day, sunken eyed and catatonic. Your best mate might be severely depressed and you wouldn't even know it. He'll hit the pub with you, have a stonking and enjoyable night out, then just go home and hang himself.
THAT'S how it works.
I have the joy of queing daily at a large post office, and I'd say half the people there are slotting those little pink cards into the machines 'all of it please mate' they say, one after another. I really wanna pipe up and say 'so what the %$&% is meant to be wrong with you', 'you look fitter than me'.
Well at least they had a nice sleep..... often I've been up since 1am.. it's 9am, with another 8-10 hrs to go till I can lounge about. Still, they have the wad of free cash... off to the cafe next door for a nice free fry up then off to primark for some guchi gear, maybe stopping at phone shop for a iphone on way home. (home to watch 50" plasma and build crazy high spec PCs)
Lifes great
Some people are genuinely sick and need help, I agree... the large majority are taking the *&^%
There's that bitterness again.
I'll admit, I'm almost as bitter as you about the whole thing. I live pretty much on a council estate, and I see them on a daily basis. Hell, their scratty children love nothing more than harrassing me and the wife any chance they get. Whatever they can claim for -- depression, bad back, can't work because they've got 50 kids... they've certainly got more time and money that we do, both working full time. But I'd rather work, I enjoy buying the stuff I want with my own hard-earned, and as much as it almost kills me to get up and get on the bus some days I do it because I have more pride than that.
As I said, though, it's a tough fight, and I won't belittle anyone that genuinely has to do it every day, and doesn't feel that they're strong enough.
Far too many fiddle the dole, but "the majority"? I'm not convinced.