Input on a Dilemma

Rainagul

Rainagul

Rainagul

Associate
Joined
4 Aug 2009
Posts
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Location
Canterbury
Hello GD,

I'm facing a dilemma at the moment and thought getting some input from people not involved in the situation would help me get to a final answer. Or be trolled to death, you know whatever works.

So for the last 2 years me and my best mate have been saving for a trip to Miami that we are scheduled to go on Tuesday for about 10 days. Not having been on a proper holiday for the last 3 years due to work I am itching to go. Unfortunately cancellation of this trip will mean we lose about 80% of the money we put into organizing it all.

In a sad turn of events, my father suffered a brain aneurysm this Thursday past. I obviously dropped everything and rushed to be with him with my mother at the hospital. His current state is a little up in the air, but what is clear is that he will be in medically induced coma for a week or so, and will need to be at the hospital for many weeks following that. There isn't a whole lot I can do at the moment aside from hope and be patient.

With all this in mind GD, if you were in my shoes would you cancel the trip and stay or go? I think I know what I will choose to do, but seeing what other people think would be useful.
 
When i was a lot younger my dad came in from an evening out with his mates, He complained he didn't feel great, 3h later we called an ambulance 3h after that he was dead.

Help your mum get through it aswell, terrible timing but life can be like that.
 
I would stay, it's all about providing support to your mother and other family members.

I personally wouldn't be able to enjoy my holiday if I knew my father was lying in a coma - your mind will flick between where you are and where you should be.

It maybe worth asking your holiday company for a refund and explain the circumstances they maybe sympathetic
 
Say behind. Support your mum and be there for your dad when they bring him out of the coma. You'll never forgive yourself if he dies whilst you've been on holiday. Also check with your travel insurance as you may get a refund.
 
If he's your best mate he should be forcing you to stay behind, to be honest. You really should stay behind. As said above, if anything happens whilst you're away, you'll never forgive yourself.
 
As harsh as it seems, I'd go.

He'll be in an induced coma which will mean most of his brain is shut down, and therefore (despite what the movies make you think), he won't be able to know you're not there.

Even if you are there, what will you do? Sit at the bed?

I'm sure he wouldn't want you to waste the money you've been saving for.
 
Sucks, but how will you even enjoy the holiday?

Seems like there's a little time left to see how things pan out though. I'm sure he'd probably not want you to cancel but sometimes you just have to do the right thing.
 
Defo check your holiday insurance - it should cover at least some of the cost if travel company won't refund. And threaten to go to the press if either give you a hard time.
 
You only have one dad. You can go to America anytime. Why risk not being for him when he needs you most. If it was me, I wouldn't of even needed to post on an internet forum for advice.
 
You don't mention if you have travel insurance? Hopefully you have this already sorted if so check the policy wording for Cancellation & Curtailment. Looking for something that reads like this:

"We will provide this cover in the following necessary and unavoidable circumstances:
Cancellation
If you cancel your journey before it begins because one of the following happens:
• The death, serious injury or serious illness of you, someone you were going to stay with, a travelling companion, or a relative of you or a travelling companion."

"Relative
Your mother (in-law), father (in-law), step parent (in-law), sister (in-law), brother (in-law), wife, husband, son (in-law), daughter (in-law), step child, foster child, grandparent, grandchild, partner (including common law and civil partnerships) or fiancé(e)."

As to what you should do, stay in my opinion. You'll be worried about him whilst your gone and even if he's unlikely to wake up during the holiday think about what your mum will be going through, having you there will be a massive boost to her. Went through something similar last year when my dad had a cancer scare and it really knocked my mum for six, having me there to help run her to the hospital, get the shopping in etc really made a major difference.
 
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