Logistics of a wedding on a family farm

[Guest2]

Me and my fiancé love the idea of having a smallish wedding on the grounds of a private family farm.
It's a working dairy farm, with cows a bull, tractors and such.
I've spoken to family and they have agreed to this.

There will be around 40 people, 50 including band and catering - mostly family and some close friends. The more I think about logistics of things like portaloos, marquee, band and equipment outside, generators, setup & cleanup the harder its sounding.
We dont want guests using the inside family house, there is no parking (enough for maybe 2 or 3 cars) the location is quite rural and kids only due to things like cows and bulls being there.

I've jotted down some rough costs and it would be about £6000 including food, drinks, groomswear, bridesmaid dresses, photographer, band, portaloos. Most things like flowers, band, photography are provided by friends who will also take part in the wedding. Nothing OTT

Has anyone ever held a wedding at their / their families house and know how feasable it is?

 

[Guest2]

Portaloos are really bad for people in decent clothes!

That had not even crossed my mind - thanks, a grand start

 

[Guest2]

How are people getting there if there’s no parking?

For 40 guests I’m guessing 2 people per car you need space for 20 vehicles, plus vehicles for catering, plus vehicle for DJ or band. They are not going to like it if you tell them they have to park a mile down the road in the village and walk with all their gear, or I suspect the guests won't either. I mean how are they going to leave in the evening?

That's your biggest problem.

Taxis. I've taxid to / from there many times (Xmas day and boxing day numerous times) It's not completely out in the sticks.

 

[Guest2]

Taxi with a drum set? Taxi for your catering staff and food and cooking equipment?

No, there's parking space for equipment and catering (just not all 40 odd guests)

 

[Guest2]

Theres got to be cheaper ways to have a roll in the hay surely?

Roll in bed / shower / bath / sofas. It's cleaner

 

[Guest2]

Yeah I cannot see this flying. I had a garden wedding - nothing fancy, just a few chairs, tables, some hired plates and glasses etc and they rocked up in a 7.5 tonner, you aren't going to get a DJ or a band or anything like that over in a taxi.

Vehicles for band and catering should be fine as they have large tractors on site - which im guessing are around 10 tonne. We just dont want 20 odd guest cars blocking the single road to the house

 

[Guest2]

There are farms that offer this sort of venue, surely it's better to go to one of those than try and do it like this. They'll have parking, toilets, a barn, etc etc.

Yes, but at massive cost. Some seem to be around 15k just for the venue and basics. Nope

 

[Guest2]

Well, you will need parking for the band, depends how the band arrives. I know some arrive separately, like guitarist with his own car, drummer with his own car etc. Then you are looking at like 4 parking spaces just for the band....unless when you hire them, you ask them to come together.

Then Catering...pretty sure each staff will come separately too. I would expect you need like 10 spaces for the people working at the wedding.

As for guests, yes you can "force" them to take taxi, then you need to almost plan it FOR THEM. If you tell them "company X, Y, Z" to use on the day, "please book early" etc etc, you bet your bum 50% of them do not, and they will turn up at your farm. Then you will have to tell them to go to X, Y, Z place to park and call X, Y, Z number and get back. Which means you are going to spend ages in logistic organising your guests' arrival, which means a significant portion will be late. Unless there are like 20 free cabs in the area at all times. Of course, this is worst case scenario but even at a normal wedding where there are plenty of parking, there is always 1 or 2 parties who arrive that little after the start of proceedings.

And when it ends, like midnight, are there enough local taxi that can handle your guests. Sure some will go a little early. But you need to be aware that some will simply have to wait for their turn in the taxi at the end. So logically, the window of when they arrive and leave is going to be huge.

Band all know each other and will come together so guess 2 cars.
Catering wise we want to book a hog roast.

Surely if we say there's no parking people get the idea! There's a local pub a 2 min walk away so drop offs and pickups from there

 

[Guest2]

Have you agreed with the family that owns the far if you can get there days before the actual wedding day? You might need to do a lot of small trips with your suppliers to set up the marquee and etc?

Also where is the ceremony going to be hosted?

I'm getting married in 8 weeks and we've paid for an exclusive wedding venue, a lot of the details are organised by use but the bulk of the wedding is all organised by them. We even get an event organiser to coordinate if anything goes **** up.

Vows, rings and stuff on site, my cousin is a celebrant. Register office for the civil ceremony, ideally in the morning / on the same day.

Arrangements for supplieres, marquee and stuff might be awkward as the farm is in south yorkshire me and my fiancé are in west yorkshire.

 

[Guest2]

Does she know you don't speak English?

yes

 

[Guest2]

You need to do more than tell them "No parking on site".

You will need to give them suggestions, I recommend at least 2 places where they can park.

Then you need to give them taxi numbers, where to tell the taxi to drop off.

Then give them walking instructions.

You will then need to sign post every 50meters along the walking route with balloons or something.

What I am saying is, if you want them to come on time, to the right place, you have to treat them like children. OR they will just drive up to the farm. Because people have this mindset of "It will be alright, it's a farm, must have a LOT of space.". Regardless of what you tell them.

Strange, I went to a friends wedding 3 weeks ago and there were no signs, no taxi numbers, no info about drop off, no info about road diversions or anything.
It was a case of invite stating location and guests booked taxis to the Abbey. Most pople arrived on time, others 15 mins late due to road diversions around the grounds.

It's not a wedding where all guests have special needs, most adults can be given a location and if it says 'no parking' can manage to book a hotel and taxi to said location. Granted I will provide nearby hotels and taxi numbers for those who might be inccapable of using Google. I've been to around 15 weddings and some it has stated the address and a couple of close hotels, mostly not just book them as you need.

 

[Guest2]

If you plan it carefully to coincide with muck spreading time, every time you take a walk in the countryside you'll be reminded of your wedding day. It's a niche requirement but everyone has their thing I guess.

Joking aside, but will somebody else be organising and managing it from start to finish? The last thing you want to concerned about are children going exploring on a working farm.

It'll be no kids (bull on farm - is behind a fence, but still. It's rather large!)

 

[Guest2]

I can still remember the drama at my friends wedding... it clearly said no children at the wedding.
I was held at a very small chappel in the middle of no where...

Of course some people decided to bring their children... and was asked to wait outside with thier childern...
someone brought a baby and it wouldn't stop crying...
The people who didn't bring their kids was clearly moaning that there was a page boy and flower girl allowed..

It wasn't a case of my friend being mean, it was a case that they knew it be a very hot day, in a small chappel with no air con and the doors had to be closed due to the noise from the street.
Believe me 3 hours of sitting there and singing "kumbaya" was not fun!

Poeple are fee to brind them, but if they wonder off and get crushed but a cow or bull... well, we told you so!

 

[Guest2]

Raymond is a wedding photographer so I wouldn't dismiss his advice so out of hand.

I'm in the middle of arranging my wedding in an actual venue and that's taken a lot of organising. The idea of trying to organise a wedding in what is essentially a field in the middle of nowhere makes me wince. It does, however, sound like you've already made your mind up, so I wish you all the best!

Not at all, we only asked recently and the more I look at things required the hard it gets. Might just get married in a boring hotel instead!

 

[Guest2]

probably cheaper and better to find a nice pub tbh...

There's an amazing one in Newcastle that seems to get a lot of weddings with fire works etc.

There must be place like it all over the country in quite nice surroundings

probably a way better experience than on what's basically a field somewhere, a field that could get pretty muddy.

Mud is a very valid point, thanks

 

[Guest2]

This is a good idea, essentially your own private bus service.

Pick up at X, Y, Z time. Then ask them to call a taxi if they miss the bus.

And then the reverse in the evening.

The obvious thing is this will cost you money.

So this is a wedding i photographed in a field, that belongs to the bride's father.

It rained a little on the day, so you need to lay on the the walking route with something, and provide adequate lighting outside.

Thanks. Outside lighting is a good point, there are some on the house but the marquee will need some from a generator(s)

 

[Guest2]

Anything obvious im forgetting?

Parking - how many spaces for catering / band. Drop offs near local pub. Someone to direct traffic
Portaloos - standard for 2 £400 / luxury £1400. Not all people can use portaloos
Catering - Requires electrics/gas or standalone? Storage of food
Drinks - Bins for empties, anyone working at the 'bar' or free for all. Cans/Bottles in wheelbarrows in ice, wine on tables. Beer Keg
Band - Requires electrics, generator
Marquee - setup and takedown. Big enough for it it rains
Outdoor lighting - battery solar powered
Tables and chairs for marquee and ceremony / hay bales for ceremony seats
Isle - where & dectoration
Master of ceremonies - who?
If it rains - Mud! Marquee big enough for all guests
Post wedding cleanup (and setup)

Other -
Flowers
Cake and stand
Cutlery
Glasses
Napkins and white linen
Table plan
Photographer
Bridesmaid Dresses
Groomswear
Rings
Ceremony fees

 

[Guest2]

Isn't it fashionanle to hire a photo booth or some form of entertainment these days?

General and table decorations?

Mini gifts for guests?

I did have that down - Instax & disposible cameras

 

[Guest2]

Have you considered whether the owners of the farm might need public liability insurance? It is a working farm after all.

‘There is no legal requirement to have public liability insurance for a private party’
Wouldnt it be like me going to the same farm for a party and getting injured. Why would public liability insurance be required?

 

[Guest2]

Yes but that's not for a party at a farm is it. I suggest you conisder looking into it with the farm owner. Most likley a farm will have such insurance, but they should consider if hosting a party omn the premises is also covered.

There have been multiple parties at the farm before (not weddings) but ~50 odd guests.