Looks or personality?

Looks is the draw, personality is what seals it. It isn't shallow, it's just how it is. Shallowness is what ugly and fat people blame because they get passed over.
 
I'm not really sure on the question tbh. And I don't really know the answer either. I think for some reason judging somebody by their personality is ok because that's what he/she is supposed to be. As opposed to their looks which isn't supposed to be an accurate reflection of the person underneath.

I find it a weird concept simply because nowadays both are changeable as each other. E.g. you can change the way that you look e.g. using make-up or you can change the way that you act in front of other people by addressing your faults.

edit - sorry I seem to have completely misread your question.... For me I like to say that I'm happily 50/50. For a one night stand looks deffo count - if she's a bloody good laugh the morning after then I try to get her number if that makes any sense. If she's not got the personality to match then I leave/throw her out. However for relationships I usually go for somebody I know fairly well and whose company I enjoy, so there clearly is an element of personality there.
 
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I'd have said that Personality, Looks, Sexuality, Social Standing and Circumstance would have actuallly been a more comprehensive list BUT generally the others aren't neccessarily seen as shallow and its more commonally thought of as Looks vs Personality.
 
Looks, i'd never go up to a big fat thing and start talking to her. Maybe as a friend, but never to go out with. If a girl has an amazingly great personality and was a ming, i'd consider her a good friend.
However if there was a semi decent looking bird, i'd go up to her, take interest in her, talk to her etc.
I know there's this whole thing about "it's whats on the inside that counts" but sometimes it really isn't. I have just about never seen a male go for a minger before a looker if they didn't know their personality.
 
Month 1 = looks
Months 2-6 = 70% looks, 30% personality
Months 7-12 = 50/50
Year 1-3 = 30% looks, 70% personality
Year 3-7 = 10% looks, 90% personality
Year 7+ = it doesn't matter, you just love them.
 
Freeman said:
Looks, i'd never go up to a big fat thing and start talking to her. Maybe as a friend, but never to go out with. If a girl has an amazingly great personality and was a ming, i'd consider her a good friend.
However if there was a semi decent looking bird, i'd go up to her, take interest in her, talk to her etc.
I know there's this whole thing about "it's whats on the inside that counts" but sometimes it really isn't. I have just about never seen a male go for a minger before a looker if they didn't know their personality.
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Yeh but if she was a looker with no personality it could get very boring very quickly. Or if she disagreed with you on everything or you had nothing in common
 
The first attraction with someone is always with their looks, no doubt about it at all, you dont look at someone and think "yea they must have a nice personality", its "wow she's pretty cute". I loved the looks of my girlfriend and wanted to get to know her once i'd seen her, luckily the personality is even better which is perfect, if she was beautiful but boring it would never work. I have never been in a relationship I value quite as much as this one :)
 
Physical attraction has to play a part, one of or another it is their looks that got you to start talking to them. But of course, what good is a biscuit tin if all it is a pretty looking tin with no cookies inside.
 
CBS asked why dating someone just for their looks is socially considered as shallow - I answered.

I agree you need more which is why I clearly stated that a relastionship based solely on looks is unlikely to last - i.e. has no depth. :) There are many other factors/characteristics a relationship needs in order to work out.
 
I always say that the vast majority of relationships begin with looks because until you talk to someone, that is the only thing to go on. Once youre into the relationship then things start to even out.

I also reply to someone who says that thinking looks are important is shallow by asking what the person would do if their partner turned nasty, rude and moody all the time, i.e. their personality changed for the worse? How would that be different to someone putting on/losing loads of weight or not paying attention to how they looked? its just a different facet of that person which you love that has now changed for the worse.
 
You can be seeing the most gorgeous looking person in the world but if she has zero personlity you just aren't going to click mentally. Same as, a person can have the greatest personality on the world but if you don't find them sexually attractive then you've got no chance. You need a balance between the 2 as others have said otherwise you're doomed from the start.
 
crystaline said:
Yeh but if she was a looker with no personality it could get very boring very quickly. Or if she disagreed with you on everything or you had nothing in common
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I completely agree, which is when i'd walk away.

It's both personality and looks, but i think most people go for looks first.
 
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