Most embarassing thing you have ever done?

mrk said:
Wait, you woke up with nothing on below the belt and in the bed of another dude yet you're sure no funny business went on?

Hah!
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Well, even if I was Yes Homo, I wouldn't have been capable of anything proactive, and I had no butt pain when I woke up, but I suppose I'll never know:(:p
 
Taken from the 'draw the most embarrassing thing in your life' thread..

bledd. said:
Came back from a night out when I was about 18, was pretty drunk, but knew what I was doing.

Thought I'd watch a bit of television x and pull my goalie. This is where it started going downhill. I fell asleep and was sick all down my front. My mum found me in the morning, in a horrible state, sick everywhere, trousers down and unused tissue scattered around the place. Ruined sofa (and I was sick on my junk)


Sofa was about two weeks old too, so had to get a new cushion for her







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And here's my favourite story ever on OcUK..

ScarySquirrel said:
I can't believe I forgot that I also had a poo story. Surely everyone does? Here is mine:

My girlfriend (now-ex, although not because of this) and I visited Egypt a couple of years back, and despite being fully aware of the danger of explosive diarrhoea, it was unavoidable.

We were due to have a day trip to Cairo, but the night before we started getting that horrible aching feeling in the stomach. We went to bed early and got up at 3am ready for the 6 hour coach trip across the desert to Cairo. When we woke, we felt awful, a really nasty stabbing pain and a feeling that any moment our bowels would collapse into a flow of putrid brown mess. Despite this, we battled on and boarded the coach, unaware that we were about to have the worst 6 hours of our life.

I believe I was the first to blow, a quick scuttle to the coach toilet and all hell broke loose. This is where the problems started! The toilet didn't work!!! So naturally, I left it!

My GF was the next, she went in, greeted by the smell of my insides rotting away in the toilet. This made her throw up into the toilet, before she too had some explosive arse action. This was repeated for about 2 hours, in the dark (the light in the toilet also broke when the toilet broke). The toilet was so full of sick and poo that it started flowing onto the floor, but we had to keep using it. I think we made about 8 or 9 trips each in the first 2 hours of the journey, at one time my GF was so disorientated she fell down the stairs to the toilet, which was rather embarrassing for her as well.

My favourite bit though, and something which makes me laugh to this day. This bloke (we called him Thick Shirt Long Shorts, because he always wore a thick shirt and long shorts) went to the toilet. My GF said to me "Shouldn't you warn him?", I was so exhausted I just said "No!".

We watched as he opened the door, saw the mess and got a whiff of the smell, and projectile vomited into the toilet cubicle before deciding that he would be better off returning to his seat.

We made it to Cairo, but felt ill for a good few days after that.
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MooMoo444 said:
lol I read that as 'many years ago when I was six'

Thought to myself 'that's colourful language for a six year old' :D

Personally, my most embarassing moment is CC'ing a colleague into an email when I was flaming him behind his back. Oh god so awkward.
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I'm glad I'm not the only one that read it that way. TBF it made it funnier.
 
at a friends party, she was drunk, i got with her, but we were downstairs and 2 of her girl mates were there, so we just banged in front of em, (they were drunk) but it was still hilarious and awesome from my part.
 
The talk of tissues and poo remind me of an even more embarrassing experience than I detailed my last post!

I was due for an interview at Age Concern for a volunteer placement for I.T. mentoring.

I had a bit drink before I set off, obviously.

On the way there, I was caught short and thinking, Oh, I,m going to have to poo before I go to the interview and visit the public toilets in the town center.

Anyway, I didn't make it in time, and ended up messing myself. You have to take into account that this was on one of the main streets in my city center.

I stood over a drain at the side of the road while trying to look nonchalant as my excrement ran down the inside of my trouser legs in to the gutter.

It goes without saying that I did not attend the interview. I phoned them and made my excuses.

I went to the nearest public toilets to try and clean myself up, but it wasn't too successful.

I went to catch the bus home, I had waited a while and a felt something hanging out the back of my trousers. What's this I thought?

It was a six foot length of loo roll with clear signs of feaces on it.

Now top that!
 
I streaked naked for 2 miles (down to the seafront and back again) for a fiver when drunk one January in my youth. Todger like a raisin and nuts up near my Adams apple. Got dressed, decided that a cash point was a urinal and whipped out the old spam javelin to relieve myself. Couldn't find it as it was so cold and my motor skills were shot to pieces and realized I was wearing my boxers backwards. Stripped bottom half off in the middle of the street and got dressed properly only to catch my wang in my zip.
Still needed a pee so waddled backwards with my flaccid bleeding junk hanging out, peeing as I go, only to fall predictably on my arse and shower myself with a delightfully fragrant pub edition of essence of urine.
Thankfully this was before video phones, but the people I was out with didn't let me live this one down for a long long time.
 
Was walking round the local lake when i was a kid with friends throwing bricks in the water skimmer them across the surface and whilst walking past a bench what do i see but a pile of bricks piled up like a mini pyramid! thinking i'l have some of that i grabbed a handfull only to be greeted with a pile of dog crap under the bricks and a hand covered in it :( how the dog crapped on the bench i never understood.
 
You can just hear the thoughts in some peoples heads debating whether to share their stories or not! Some genuinely hilarious ones.


This didn't happen to me but to a mate but one of the best stories I've heard. He was on a bus going to meet up with his brother who was waiting for him at the stop. Bus arrives at the stop and the first guy off the bus starts walking very slowly in a really odd manner with his arms out and with a face of sheer horror. As he walked down the road my mates brother saw this guy had puke chunks all down his jacket and back of his head... apparently my mate's lunch hadn't agreed with him and had ralphed all over this guys back on the bus, as well as a few other people getting caught in the firing line.
 
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