New Uni Student 2022 - tips?

ivrytwr3 said:
Soooooooooooo, get some past papers?

Awesome - ty.
Click to expand...

tl;dr yes, but specifically get them ASAP for future years just so they have a nice personal stash that might otherwise disappear, it's so valuable when they're otherwise restricted that I can't emphasise it enough.

So long as they attend lectures-ish (plenty of students might miss a few, I'm sure they're mostly recorded these days so meh), get the coursework done etc.. they should have a general overview of the modules they've studied - the key though is simply smashing out those papers - that could be the difference between them (getting a 1st or high 2:1) vs some other student who otherwise put in a similar effort during the year and got a low 2:1 or 2:2.
 
You seem happy to buy him stuff and jump on every suggestion but openly admit that he’s lazy.

If he doesn’t want to do the work; you’re pouring money down the drain.

It may seem harsh but the reality of uni is a great experience. Hell genuinely get bullied if mummy is packing his bags and daddy is shipping him handouts.
 
As someone else mentioned a door wedge to keep the firesafety door to his room open for socialising purposes, some condoms and a few bottle of decent spirits/ crates of beer. Getting to know the people you are living with is key and booze always helps!
 
ivrytwr3 said:
Oooooof!! Harsh :( We're just trying to get him ready, get him out of the door and so when he arrives he can crack on with his studies and his Uni experience - also selfishly, the better prepared he is, the less issues he should be coming to us with. Surely learning from others experiences is beneficial?!
Click to expand...

I get that you're only helping him, but he's now an adult getting ready for a the next big chapter in his life. I agree with the others, he should be taking the first punt on getting an idea of what he needs, and then asking you whether there's anything he might have missed.
 
Honestly, he's a good kid - just not very street wise. He's growing up with a zillion different genders, (his bezzie is trans) blended learning and months in isolation etc, yet he's still pulling AAA predicted grades.

He hasn't asked for any of this, i'm just trying to be supportive and give him the best start we can. Wifey and I never did Uni, coming from a North East mining village i don't know many that did Academia - i did Open Uni in my 40's! We have no idea what he needs, we are relying on the interwebz and people here :)

So I'm asking here as i know there are some very intelligent people on the forums and a lot have actually recently been or still are Uni students. I've got some really useful advice here and i appreciate it :)
 
Last edited:
Zenduri said:
As someone else mentioned a door wedge to keep the firesafety door to his room open for socialising purposes, some condoms and a few bottle of decent spirits/ crates of beer. Getting to know the people you are living with is key and booze always helps!
Click to expand...

Good shout - ta.
 
You forgot a massive box of rubbers.
I would also echo what many people have said, it's time for the guy to be his own person, I wouldn't hand everything to him just the basics (stationery/pc/some food/cloths and a good matress topper) let him make mistakes and forget things.
 
Last edited:
ivrytwr3 said:
Honestly, he's a good kid - just not very street wise. He's growing up with a zillion different genders, (his bezzie is trans) blended learning and months in isolation etc, yet he's still pulling AAA predicted grades.

He hasn't asked for any of this, i'm just trying to be supportive and give him the best start we can. Wifey and I never did Uni, coming from a North East mining village i don't know many that did Academia - i did Open Uni in my 40's!

So I'm asking here as i know there are some very intelligent people on the forums and a lot have actually recently been or still are Uni students. I've got some really useful advice here and i appreciate it :)
Click to expand...

Notable that you want to give him the best start but dont baby him. He needs to learn and stand on his own feet. FYI having a trans friend and the zillion made up genders comment is completely irrelevant to the situation or the context. If anything he should be more accepting of anyone but this isn't a pass to "hes had a hard life" so we want to help him.

I remember sorting my accomodation, uni placing/visits and organising moving out on my own as my family was firm working class, single parent (father), and had no idea what to do. Just make sure hes got the essentials and put the onus on him to organise what he needs but watch over him and cover him for anything he forgets. That will help him much more than babying him and hand holding him. He's an adult, treat him like one.
 
On my first day, I drove to uni, and worked it out from there. That said I had been working and traveling for the previous year so probably less wet behind the ears....

I get you're trying to help, but help him pack some stuff, but let him organise himself as well. Don't micromanage him he's not going to get that help when he's at uni, he'll have to work it out or speak to his new friends.

He's an adult now, it's time to step up to it.
 
If he doesn't have any money and you guys are generously providing everything for him, what's his financial education like?

Maybe an idea of how to budget so those student overdrafts and loans don't end up a burden later on down the line.

+ Beers + wine
 
As has been said above, in many cases going to uni is about learning to be an adult as much as your academic subject.

Part of that is not having your parents do everything for you, and yes it's nice to give him the essentials for his new life. But if you're really planning down to his biros then I personally think it's a bit much.
 
sHo0sH said:
If he doesn't have any money and you guys are generously providing everything for him, what's his financial education like?

Maybe an idea of how to budget so those student overdrafts and loans don't end up a burden later on down the line.

+ Beers + wine
Click to expand...

Tuition fee loan + Maintenance Grant (Student loan) is means tested, so can't get full amount. The MG covers 90% of the accomm costs, so we have to make up that. Grandparents and us will be giving a monthly amount and he will have to work if he wants more £££.

Chatting to some students at the Uni, they say they do similar and their parents give them £50 per week - one of the lads says he sometimes has to choose between eating and a night out - lol.

Anyone done similar? Or an alternative?
 
I can only speak for myself and it was 20 years ago now, but I claimed complete independence from my folks, and saved money (by working as I mentioned previously) before going to uni, my parents didn't give me a penny - they probably would have if I had asked, but it was time for me to stand on my own 2 feet.

That said, as a parent, would I want to support my kids? 100%. However, I'd like to support them to gain their independence - it's tough, as you can't but want to do everything you can to look after them so I totally understand your predicament @ivrytwr3 - but at the same time, uni is for a lot young people their first time away from home, so I understand it can be quite daunting.

Admittedly the fees, costs and university life is probably somewhat different now, but I'd really encourage them by helping them plan on how to earn a bit of money, blend social life and learning. You can have an active social life, be studious and have a part time job whilst at uni and still have a great time.

you know your son better than any of us, so go with your gut / parental instinct - no one can judge you for that. A lot of people may point fingers about mollycoddling, but on reflection, you do what you need to do as a parent. Might be worth asking him what he wants too?
 
It's difficult, but i can't see any other way.

Example figures:

-£9250 tuition fees (paid back later).

-£7.5k accom costs

+£5.5k Maintenance Grant.

Where is he meant to find £2k accom shortfall + find money to live?

I think the £2k shortfall is down to me and £50 per week living allowance isn't too bad, + plus he will need to work. This is only for the 1st year, he wants to go into a shared house for year 2 and onwards.

I am also thinking of this as an investment into his future and if he gets a solid career, bank of mum and dad can close.
 
ivrytwr3 said:
It's difficult, but i can't see any other way.

Example figures:

-£9250 tuition fees (paid back later).

-£7.5k accom costs

+£5.5k Maintenance Grant.

Where is he meant to find £2k accom shortfall + find money to live?

I think the £2k shortfall is down to me and £50 per week living allowance isn't too bad, + plus he will need to work. This is only for the 1st year, he wants to go into a shared house for year 2 and onwards.

I am also thinking of this as an investment into his future and if he gets a solid career, bank of mum and dad can close.
Click to expand...
Honestly, this where you should stop. It is an amazing thing you are doing; well done for enabling it.

Now stop. Planning how many bic pens and notebooks he needs - you are literally training a future weirdo. When he gets desperately skint he'll phone hat in hand.

Edit: also no one in the world owns a stapler, you steal them from work
 
ivrytwr3 said:
It's difficult, but i can't see any other way.

Example figures:

-£9250 tuition fees (paid back later).

-£7.5k accom costs

+£5.5k Maintenance Grant.

Where is he meant to find £2k accom shortfall + find money to live?

I think the £2k shortfall is down to me and £50 per week living allowance isn't too bad, + plus he will need to work. This is only for the 1st year, he wants to go into a shared house for year 2 and onwards.

I am also thinking of this as an investment into his future and if he gets a solid career, bank of mum and dad can close.
Click to expand...

This is different to micro managing his shopping list to be honest. Budgeting like this is how my parents helped me. I had to work during holidays and did part time work at uni sometimes but they paid the unavoidable costs plus a bit more for living.

I learned to budget, make sacrifices/choices etc but never really struggled.

But, as much as I enjoyed getting food parcels from my folks when they visited, I was pretty much left to fend for myself at a practical level. They'd given me the financial tools to pretend to be an adult and live alone, I just had to learn to look after myself.
 
£7500 accommodation ??? That's almost £200 a week for 40weeks a year. Is halls of residence that much these days? That's more than some mortgage payments.
 
£167 - £174 per week for a decent single room, any less and it would be shared rooms /bathrooms.

There are better rooms, but of course these are more ie £210 per week.

These are warwick and uea costs.
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom