Office arguments - is it all about culture?

[TJM]

But recently I've started to work for a service based company - there's a lot more women and london commuters in the office (not really ever seen either in great numbers at work before) and a hell of a lot more bureaucracy which is resulting in loads of arguments.

And people are getting all offended over it, like it's fundamentally wrong to disagree with each other and argue a point, or it's all personal.

"If you run into an ******* in the morning, you ran into an *******. If you run into ******** all day, you're the *******."

To be a bit more serious, there shouldn't be constant arguments at work. Team members pulling in roughly the same direction should actually agree on most things unless a company has been staffed with people who thrive on conflict/petty squabbles, which is a strong possibility.

 

[Mr Badger]

"If you run into an ******* in the morning, you ran into an *******. If you run into ******** all day, you're the *******."

Reminds me of a guy I worked with who tended to get very wound up about trivial things and couldn't admit he was wrong when he had said something stupid. Which was fairly often. Classic moment was when he went off on a rant one day about being surrounded by ******** and how this was just like his previous job that he had to leave because everyone there was an ******** as well

 

[Fuzz]

I think I must raise my voice to one of the directors weekly.

He never ****ing listens!

FFFFUUUUUUuuuuuuuuu

 

[bitslice]

he went off on a rant one day about being surrounded by ******** and how this was just like his previous job that he had to leave because everyone there was an ******** as well

Sounds like every game of World of Tanks ever played, everyone is on a team full of idiots and noobs, sometimes even those teams that win
(obviously the ranter died early on in his keeness to lead the charge* and everyone else didn't die with him)


*I would never do this of course

 

[Mr Badger]

Sounds like every game of World of Tanks ever played, everyone is on a team full of idiots and noobs, sometimes even those teams that win
(obviously the ranter died early on in his keeness to lead the charge* and everyone else didn't die with him)


*I would never do this of course

The tragedy of falling to friendly fire?

Not really an acceptable option in your typical office environment though...

 

[D.P.]

I wouldn't argue with people if they were right!

 

[Mr Badger]

I wouldn't argue with people if they were right!

Like that's ever going to happen...

 

[Make]

I had this in my previous call centre job. My team lead changed 6 times in two years, the females were always resorting to raising their voice in the meetings, and being generally abusive. I also got sudden increases in workload compaired to everyone else if I ever disagreed with anything. I only ever had one male, and he was great.

It's hard not to be sexist after an experience after that.

For example, I told a (female) teamleader that my PC had network problems. She thought the problem is sctratches on my network cable. I told her.. nah, and got shouted at for trying to be correct. She had 0 technical experience.

I won't work in an office any more if it's up to me.

 

[albert]

The manager that follows my shift is a Portuguese Woman. I once emailed her about a problem I had on her shift, and for some reason I typed it in capitals. She put a grievance against me because she was offended by the email being in capital's saying she's Catholic and anything in capital letters is deemed offensive. Nothing happened and the grievance was quashed.

 

[bitslice]

The tragedy of falling to friendly fire?

Not really an acceptable option in your typical office environment though...

Backstabbing is a fact of life in some offices.

/


I've had a couple a female bosses, they have all been pretty unpleasant to work for, either being randomly vindictive or just plain sneaky. I don't think men bond as easily with them as they do a male boss, I've had males ones I really didn't rate but you find other ways of getting on.
On the technical side of things you see women who can function in the job, but you never get the male uber geek who knows your job, knows his own x100 and likes finding better ways of doing stuff.

I suspect a lot of women don't like female bosses either, the level of bitchyness always seems greater.

It's a shame really, in theory women can bring a more rounded, less egotistic attitude to work, but you never get to see that in real life.

I do know a woman with a high pressure job, her bookshelves are heaving with how to be a manager type bibles, maybe leading isn't quite as instinctual as it is with a lot of men.

 

[[FnG]magnolia]

I too wish The Women would stop oppressing us downtrodden men folk.

 

[postbox]

People constantly questioning your decisions without any decent alternatives can get tiring so I can get abrupt, but I've never shouted at anyone. The top three pointless comebacks in my office are:
"Really!?"
"Have / haven't we!?"
"Are you sure!?"

 

[Gilly]

Office arguments belong in the 80s and 90s.

Only a lack of clear leadership and a lack of empowerment in the workforce (and unprofessional staff, ofc) allows for office arguments.

None of my staff would have a row in one of my meetings.

 

[bitslice]

I too wish The Women would stop oppressing us downtrodden men folk.

I never said that?
Or is this a call to the gallery

Sigh

These vague pronoucements of yours are so annoying, is there any subject in the world on which you have an single opinion of your own, or is everything you say just to smirk at what someone else said?

Really, do you like cheese, what's your favourite colour, are Americans trucks good, is Russia a nice place?

Anything is better than "hurr hurr somebody said something and I'm going to imply that's a bad thing but without fully committing to defining what would be a good thing myself"

Sometimes you are just an intelligent version of the sort of person who comments on YouTube videos.
....yeh, it's that bad

 

[Adsta]

I don't think men bond as easily with them as they do a male boss, I've had males ones I really didn't rate but you find other ways of getting on.

To very loosely quote The Sopranos

Men are in love with their mothers, so taking orders from a woman boss is not a major problem.

 

[robgmun]

This is infuriating. I sent an email asking a female colleague to provide me with times and locations for meetings she'd arranged for me to be in (with less than 24 hours notice, I hasten to add) and she came back saying there was "no need to be so rude."

It was rather difficult not to respond by telling her to just do her ****ing job like everybody else; which no doubt would've made matters exponentially worse.

Just forward the email to HR and tell them that's an unacceptable response to a valid request for information, tell them to have a word with her to make it clear what her role is.

 

[Judgeneo]

I have one female boss, and shes a lot more alpha than most of the team

 

[Gilly]

Until I moved up and she moved into a different role, I had a peer that was a woman, and at the same time reported to a woman. Never had an issue in that, mistakes were made and were dealt with. Made no difference that they had teats.

 

[AHarvey]

We've a new manager that has come in and discussing opinions and ideas like are encouraged, and can get heated at times. It's a very different management method than previously where ultimately the manager made the decision, usually without consulting anyone with knowledge on the subject.

Current boss encourages people to question things and argue the case, however, his 2 new underlings (my direct managers) are old school and pretend to give a damn and ignore it all anyway.

It takes a leader to run a team like this, not a manager and it takes grown up people to a)put their points across in a grown up manner and b)not take offense to disagreement.

Other than that, we argue over the TV when one of the numpties wants to put rubbish on like TOWIE or Eastenders

 

[pitchfork]

Good old Butchers fridge chat.... I presume you have a butchers fridge where you work?

Doing this always worked wonders back in the day. Even now the GM turns a blind eye.. Personnel manager may have a slightly different view point though lol

Christ, that takes me back, I remember years ago when I was a student working in tescos having a proper "conversation" with a colleague in the loading bay. Upon walking back in the store with smashed up faces and being asked what happened "fell into the compactor and I tried to stop him falling then fell too" which was clearly ********, but we both got on well after that.

I don't think it'd work quite as well for serious work related matters though.