Quick joke.

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A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below.

He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago but I don't know where I am."

The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be in Information Technology," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."

The woman below responded, "You must be in Management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we even met, but now, somehow, it's my ******* fault."

Hope this isn't another 'fail' thread. :p
 
fail.jpg
 
Last time I heard it, it was a woman in the balloon and a man on the ground. How things change.

But seeing as the genders have changed, maybe the joke should have too...

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below.

He ignored the woman, because she's a woman and didn't want to admit to anyone he was lost, especially a woman. He then shouted some random obscenity about the woman's breasts and floated away ...

or


A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below.

He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago but I don't know where I am."

The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be in Information Technology," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "you're ugly. There's never any pretty women in IT"
 
reminds me of a webcomic - i think on XKCD - but not sure. Can't really search for it anyway.

Something to do with people's answers being correct but not useful anyway.
 
Seeing as we are in a reposting mood, I am going to repost a joke I posted a couple of weeks ago....and why not!

Two pregnant paddies are knitting jumpers. One says "I hope my baby is a boy as I am using blue wool". The others says I hope mine is a spastic cos I have ****** the arms up!"
 
Seeing as we are in a reposting mood, I am going to repost a joke I posted a couple of weeks ago....and why not!

Two pregnant paddies are knitting jumpers. One says "I hope my baby is a boy as I am using blue wool". The others says I hope mine is a spastic cos I have ****** the arms up!"

*cough* ha.... *cough* *cough*
 
The original is far funnier. :D

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position and course to fly to the airport. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, drew a handwritten sign, and held it in the helicopter's window. The pilot's sign said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters.

People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign read: "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER."

The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the co-pilot asked the pilot how the "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER" sign helped determine their position. The pilot responded "I knew that had to be the MICROSOFT building because they gave me a technically correct, but completely useless answer."
 
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