So I have a mouse in my house

The Secret is to go proper sick on the first then Nail it to the door all butchered. Cut one of his legs off & shove it up his **** sort of thing & slice his guts open, Nads off as well & shove them in his mouth.
Word will soon get around in the Mice world & they'll avoid you.
 
The Secret is to go proper sick on the first then Nail it to the door all butchered. Cut one of his legs off & shove it up his **** sort of thing & slice his guts open, Nads off as well & shove them in his mouth.
Word will soon get around in the Mice world & they'll avoid you.

Mount it's head on a cocktail stick.
 
Simply follow this easy guide:

Step 1 - Move all furniture out of your home into storage
Step 2 - Buy a metric tonne of cheese.
Step 3 - Buy a shotgun
Step 4 - Dress fully in yellow, apply yellow face paint and dye hair yellow
Step 5 - Put cheese in coner in room with single door
Step 6 - Sit atop said cheese with shotgun
Step 7 - Wait
 
lol, reading that title just reminded me of a ex that used to refer to her time of the month as 'there is a mouse in the house'.

Sigh. That's a nice girlfriend. Mine just says "i've got heavy flow and it's probably not a good idea. Bloody balls are a turn off". Thanks babe.
 
You can get a pack of spring-loaded mouse traps from most household utility stores. Set them and place them close to any open entrances such as fireplaces etc. and load them with chocolate. Mice go bananas for it.

Remember, where you've seen one, there's 20 you haven't.

We had quite a bad lot about 10 years ago, and this was in the city! Infestation of field mice during the winter. Our bedroom had a fireplace where they were coming from. One night, I was lying in bed and heard the trap shut, and for about 5 seconds afterwards a rapid "scuff-fff-f-f-f-f-f-f--f-fff" noise.

Got up in the morning and found it'd gotten two of them. The first went for the chocolate and got its neck/skull crushed by the trap. The second got whapped right down the nose/front of the head, but not actually in the trap. Must have went into some kind of horrid fit after getting whacked, which is what I heard.

Thats about all the reason I would need to not do it like this :eek:
 
OP: I have some humane traps if you really want them, whereabouts are you :p I still say fry the sod with the Electronic device :D
 
Humane traps didn't work for me, wasted a fair but of money on them :( If you release the mouse elswehere, it will become someone else's problem.
They are cunning little blighters, and humane traps don't always work, no. However, we've had a single humane trap for years and it's never failed.

And to say it's going to be someone else's problem is just daft. Do you have any idea of the UK mouse population that don't live in people's houses? Just release it in a hedgerow or a little wood or something.
 
Cheers guys.

I've bought 3 humane traps. Going to bait them and set them now. Ill post pics of my new friend when I have caught him.

Im thinking peanut butter in two and for dessert I'll put nutella in the third.
 
Cheers guys.

I've bought 3 humane traps. Going to bait them and set them now. Ill post pics of my new friend when I have caught him.

Im thinking peanut butter in two and for dessert I'll put nutella in the third.

Shoulda gone for spring traps tbh, but oh well. When you catch 'him', make sure to replace the trap. Where there's one, there's sure to be an entire family you haven't seen (yet). A bit like illegal immigrants. :D Post up when Abdul is caught. LOL
 
Shoulda gone for spring traps tbh, but oh well. When you catch 'him', make sure to replace the trap. Where there's one, there's sure to be an entire family you haven't seen (yet). A bit like illegal immigrants. :D Post up when Abdul is caught. LOL

This kind of put me off getting spring loaded traps, plus this way I get a pet.

Got up in the morning and found it'd gotten two of them. The first went for the chocolate and got its neck/skull crushed by the trap. The second got whapped right down the nose/front of the head, but not actually in the trap. Must have went into some kind of horrid fit after getting whacked, which is what I heard.
 
Why would that put you off getting spring traps? You don't want to hear it go off? Certainly the 'fit' is nothing to be concerned about, it's just nerves firing randomly because the brain suffered instant death by crushing. All dead stuff does this to one degree or another. :)
 
Why would that put you off getting spring traps? You don't want to hear it go off? Certainly the 'fit' is nothing to be concerned about, it's just nerves firing randomly because the brain suffered instant death by crushing. All dead stuff does this to one degree or another. :)

Quite true. If you shoot something like a rabbit, they often leap in the air then run around in a circle for a few seconds. On close inspection, it is quite clear the brain has been destroyed and they were dead when the pellet hit (talking about non-FAC air rifles here!).

And FFS, it's only a mouse!
 
You need two cats for them to effectively work. One that goes hunting while the lazy fat one sits around, and the other for when the hunter brings the mouse back alive and decides it is boring and would prefer to eat canned tuna.
 
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