Social anxiety

CircleFaust said:
i find because of my shyness i tend to overdo it and talk too much, i hate silence when i'm with someone
it's ok when theres more than two people but when with just one other person i feel a real pressure to talk
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Never ends well tho does it :p

I tend to talk just to fill the silence, but end up saying really boring stuff. You can start to see their eyes glaze over :p

Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

It's annoying to watch people who can just talk and talk and laugh and joke, and it's no big deal. Then when you try to have a conversation yourself it's 2 mins of misery, where every word is painful to deliver, and the end result is that the other person thinks you're a ****.

But then if everybody I talk to thinks I'm a ****... maybe...
 
Chalk up another sufferer here too .... although it's odd. Going out round town during the day, or even travelling on holiday I'm absolutely fine. But more social type situations cause me problems and alcohol makes it worse not better (to the extent i have actually just gone home from events after a couple of drinks as I was just didn't want to be there at all (it was a work Christmas do so was expected to go).
 
Another sufferer here. Do my best to avoid social interaction with colleagues and most of the time family get togethers as well, tend to stick to same routines for any going out i do. Shopping gets done early on my days off to limit the amount of people i might interact with, just seem to get nervous and very sweaty to the point where i only seem to own dark shirts these days have tried several the stronger deodorants on the market. Driclor seems to work best but needs a few days use.
 
I suspect avoiding social situations etc.. perhaps only make things worse.

Ayahuasca said:
Not really, there's plenty of people who have it who are very confident in certain settings or in their line of work.
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indeed which is perhaps because they've simply got used to it in those situations and an indicator that they could perhaps solve the issue in other areas too

acting classes, improvisation, public speaking (toastmasters) etc.. could probably help a lot of people with this sort of thing
 
I think i have a form of it, was really bad in my teens and although not as bad now, i sometimes go quiet in conversations because my mind goes blank and i have nothing to talk about, i think this is because of lack of socialising so i never really got great social skills. I have adopted a dont care stance though so if i have a conversation that seems awkward, before i would think about it for at least an hour or 2 now i just ignore those thoughts.
 
Had it really badly about 8 years ago. To the point I would find excuses to not leave my house, i stopped taking the bus to work and started walking just because i couldn't cope being on a bus with other people. Couldn't go to the cinema because there were too many people.....if i didn't have a simple, understandable or quiet way of escaping a situation i felt trapped and anxious. Also used to have random panic attacks, primarily at night, for no reason at all.

Used to go to the pub with friends (an ordeal getting to that point in the first place) then randomly slip out when it got too much without saying anything to anyone.

On the brightside, a lot better now. The more people around you that know and understand what you're going through and the more you subject yourself to situations that make you feel uncomfortable, the easier it gets. I still won't go to the cinema, but i can go out for meals etc again without too much issue now at least. Still get days where i have issues, but panic attacks and general avoidance of doing most things has gone now.
 
Chris Wilson said:
Serious question, if you don't mind me asking, what age group are you that have these traumas about social situations?
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Personally, now 30, was 21-22 at the start of it all. Although, thinking back further....i remember EVERY sunday night feeling anxious, having breathing problems (anxious breathing/hyperventilating basically) about going to school on the Monday. The theme tune to antiques roadshow gives me flashbacks, not even kidding!
 
Chris Wilson said:
Serious question, if you don't mind me asking, what age group are you that have these traumas about social situations?
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Well my girlfriend is 25 and I'm 27. Even the simplest of things can have the most negative effect someday's. Like we recently went shopping at Aldi and we was going through with two separate transactions. While it might sound silly to some, her first transaction was declined but worked the second time and I think it was being put in such a situation that caused her anxiety that day. While it left me with shopping to cart, she pretty much had to escape the shop and I caught up with her outside.

I never send parcels to anyone and near Mother's Day I was sending a parcel to my mum, soon as I got near enough to entering the post office my heart was pounding in my chest and didn't calm down until I got out.

I think a lot of my problems stem from being bullied in school and just being labeled as quiet by the entire family. When I was younger we used to have family gatherings all the time, not that I looked forward to them as they was always the same. Me and my family would mostly just mingle amongst ourselves and I personally wouldn't talk unless spoken to. I even found getting food hard back then as I knew I had to pass by people.

Although we have a daughter now and we stay strong for her as what has pretty much held us back in life, we don't want to happen to her.
 
Spacedeck said:
Although we have a daughter now and we stay strong for her as what has pretty much held us back in life, we don't want to happen to her.
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I'm sure she'll turn out fine since you're already fairly conscious of the potential issue. Kids drama classes could deffo help to ensure she's confident in front of people. :)
 
My issue is when there's more than one person in the conversation I tend to clam up and end up escaping the situation. I'm fine pretty much talking to anyone one on one however.

I overthink things most others wouldn't dream of thinking of which also causes anxiety and avoidance. A lot of socialising that is forced is best being avoided anyway, unless its a conversation worth having and has a purpose, then it can be enjoyable.

Its nice to see others with similar issues, you sometimes feel like the only one when everyone else seem to have conversations with each other so naturally.
 
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