Son got first job, fair rate for board

Participant said:
Teaches them discipline with money, respecting what you're providing them, learning to deal with rent coming out. Loads of good reasons tbh.
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And that can't be taught without making them pay you?

My parents never charged me for something like that and I was fortunate enough that they provided for me, but that never meant I didn't appreciate the value of money so to speak. Was always careful about what I spent etc. and treat their money the same as I would mine.
 
When I was at home and earning my folks asked me for 250 a month. Didn't grudge it at all since they paid my rent through uni. Still allowed me to save up for a deposit on my current place along with the odd holiday , football days out and a stupid amount of camera gear! Might have been late on the property ladder but I'm comfortable, still saving some cash and enjoying it!
 
LOAM said:
Charge him £200, put £50 a month in an account, when he moves out give him the savings to help set him up.
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I've never lived with my parents since I left school, so have no benchmark to gauge against. But that said, the above is about where I would be. Except I'd be charging £250 and banking £100 for his first mortgage deposit.

He'll need a dig out for this anyway, so I would do that. I wouldn't want to make it too cheap for him (i.e. charging £150) because it wont be a fair representation on the costs of living in the real world (that is, afterall, council house rent without bill or anything), and if he knows that, then he is less likely to leg it (assuming you want him to go out and find his own way of course).

That's pretty much the route I'll take should this happen to me in the future. However, I really do hope that my children want to get out there asap and stand on their own, as I did, and their mother. Of course we will support them whatever, but you have to start showing them living costs money.

All that said, if he is a sensible chap, and is saving hard for his first place anyway, all you are doing is guaranteeing that first £100 per month saving. I also would not, under any circumstances, let slip that's what you're doing either. Make it a proper surprise. Even if he turns round to you and tells you he has the deposit together for his first place, there are always more costs in buying a house over the deposit, as well as furniture etc...

If you don't need any money at all, then bank the full £250, and give him half for his first deposit, and take him on his last family holiday with the rest.
 
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Sudden said:
And that can't be taught without making them pay you?
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It can, but charging is an acceptable variant and instils more financial discipline than not charging. When I lived at home, my parents were / are well-off, but they charged me all the same, which slightly irked me at the time, but without it I think I'd have been less disciplined when I was renting.
 
Mynight said:
I thought I was just unlucky :D.
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Not being entirely fair mind, but I've got 2 sisters the older one the stereotypical always broke, careless with money, etc. and the younger one is the complete opposite and more like me when it comes to money - we all had the same upbringing.
 
Participant said:
It can, but it's an acceptable variant and instils financial discipline.
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Perhaps. And I can see the logical reasoning behind it, but as a concept, it just seems incredibly alien to me and not something I can ever imagine doing.

Whole point of pocket money I thought when you were a kid was to instil that kind of discipline. You have a fine amount. Your pleasurable activities come out of that. You run out, no more such activities for you. For that to extend to rent, food etc. seems very odd to me.

As I said though, perhaps just a culture thing, particularly given that it seems the vast majority of people here are in favour of it.
 
I used to pay £250, i never understood why they charged me, but they paid for all my university expenses, then gave me some money towards a house deposit.
 
my dad never charged me anything. he wanted me to save up as much i could to buy a house quickly. i moved out at when i was 19. i started work at 16
 
I wouldn't charge my own children to live with me. At worst I'd request some money to invest in a way that generates a return they can't otherwise get.
 
craptakular said:
I used to pay £250, i never understood why they charged me, but they paid for all my university expenses, then gave me some money towards a house deposit.
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Over simplifying it and ignoring other aspects I suspect a lot of it is because that has how its always been done - probably stemming from a time when it was needed by most to make ends meet and a whole different world of financial discipline in a generalised sense.
 
Take his bank card and details. Dip into his account whenever you want. Tell him it's a lesson for when he gets a long term partner.

I can't remember the last time I saw my debit card...
 
I don't know if that has been said but if you don't need the money from him why don't you do him a favour and put what you take into a savings account for him to use as a house deposit.

I always paid 25% of my basic rate to my parents, if I did overtime that money was all mine.
 
I take home a similar amount a month and pay £65 a week so ~280 a month.

I'd say 200-300 would be fair and if you don't particularly need the money stick 50-100 aside as mortgage deposit.
 
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