I hope you mother is OK.
Life is liek that with expenses. I purchased the D800 instead if the D800 E (the E has no anti-aliasing filter so is sharper) because it was $500 more expensive and I thought that money would be better sent on a lens. A few days later a large stone cracked the winds screen of my car and I spent $400 repairing it, a month later after a long road trip trying to park in the dark I backed into a concrete post and spent another $450 repairing that, due to the stress of that I totally forgot about an offer on furniture that I wanted so I missed the discount and spent another few hundred to get it at full retail. Then I look at the $2000 I pay on mortgage and the $1000 a month on child care soon and I kind of think damn, should have gone with the E model!
I know what you mean about no perfect tripod. What I wanted to ensure was complete stability and easy of use from the head. I compromised on having something that is not that light, not quite tall enough, and doesn't collapse that small. But I can live with thee compromises. Simple physics and mechanics will show you can't make something much lighter relative to the weight of what it must support, and to make something collapsing then you typically compromise on stability, e.g. a 4th telescopic leg section will have to be smaller than the 3rd, so that will be less strong, Something taller will always be less stable than something closer to the ground.