Stupid ANSWERS tech support give you...

Call center staff in "Not that technical" shocker! :p

In one of my previous jobs I had to undergo some CBT training for Java, despite me pointing out I had already been developing with Java for quite a while. So anyway, I had a question pop-up which I didn't agree with the content, so I emailed the tutors group and received a reply the next day from someone called "bob" in Dehli. It said: "Have a look at the example below" with the answer to the question copied and pasted just below it.. I wasn't even mailing because I was stuck.. I was mailing because I disagreed with the question's content.
 
Chester University.

Rich

Oh alright! I was just wondering because Warwick call their network ResNet and have muppets working for IT Services.

Back in the 1st year, just after everyone had moved back into the halls following the Christmas break, I called up saying that Windows was saying "Limited or No Connectivity" for everyone on the left hand side of the first floor.

The guy on the end of the phone asked me to check my settings, and ensure that the cable was plugged in on both ends. Being a Computer Science student and adept at computer systems and technical support, this really annoyed me as I had already explained to him that it was happening to half of the 1st floor.

He insisted that there was nothing wrong with their systems, and the problem must be my end. I finally snapped, and told him to be quiet and actually listen to what I was saying. However, he still insisted that their systems were fine, so I hung up.

I get a call 10 minutes later asking if it was working... and funnily enough everyone's was working. Nothing wrong my ****!
 
Acer suck over here, so while seeing my parents in auckland (nz) i had them fix it (failing hdd) on the international warranty program, even grave me a free keyboard even though it was my fault it was broken
 
Sometimes we do it because it's easier. Many years ago (I mean many!) I got a call from a customer who was having a problem with his hard disk. I could hear the stepper motor over the phone and that is not a good sign. Anyway, I told him his hard disk was "running off-center" because it was an answer he could understand. Then I sent an engineer on-site with a new one.
 
I've Phoned up BT coz my ADSL speed was cut from 2meg to 1/2meg The first thing they asked me. "Is the router plugged in?" *hung Up*

My speed fell from 4mb to 12.1k and the BT operative claimed that the speednet rating was false and that they would only accept speed ratings from BT's own speedtester. She claimed that my connection was 'normal' and that any loss of speed was probably due to my Sky dish. :rolleyes: I told them to get it sorted as I had attempted to run speedtester and gave up after an hour. I informed her that if my speed was not restored within two hours that I would seek legal help with regards to breach of contract by BT. My speed increased to 6mb within 30 minutes. :D
 
Oh alright! I was just wondering because Warwick call their network ResNet and have muppets working for IT Services.

Back in the 1st year, just after everyone had moved back into the halls following the Christmas break, I called up saying that Windows was saying "Limited or No Connectivity" for everyone on the left hand side of the first floor.

The guy on the end of the phone asked me to check my settings, and ensure that the cable was plugged in on both ends. Being a Computer Science student and adept at computer systems and technical support, this really annoyed me as I had already explained to him that it was happening to half of the 1st floor.

He insisted that there was nothing wrong with their systems, and the problem must be my end. I finally snapped, and told him to be quiet and actually listen to what I was saying. However, he still insisted that their systems were fine, so I hung up.

I get a call 10 minutes later asking if it was working... and funnily enough everyone's was working. Nothing wrong my ****!
I'm at Salford and our ISD (Information Services Division) bunch are usless. In my first year here the number of times I got the "Limited or no Connectivity" message was simply astounding. In the end I kept a log of when it happened to prove it to ISD.

Then I found someone in the Computer Science department who knew that I knew what I was talking about; so when I said something wasn't working, it wasn't. Once I couldn't logon to a PC in the labs. I noticed no-one else could. All the others are asking each other, "Can you logon? I can't".

So I pop off to see my contact and say it ain't happening. She rings ISD and tells them we can't logon. They tell her nothing is showing up as being wrong their end. :rolleyes:

Then they looked and something was wrong. :D Turns out the first ISD knew of something being wrong was when I found my contact and told her what was going on with an explanation so she knew I was right. She'd ring ISD up and that'd be the first they knew about anything.

Unfortunately she retired a year ago. She was cool. Knew what she was doing and knew that I knew what I was on about when something broke. :(
 
I had a dead HP Laptop and was advised to remove the hard drive and optical and place them in a cool place for 3-4 hours!

Well, there is some semi-truth in there. If your HDD fails, as a last chance to get data off it you can seal it in a freezer bag and put it in the freezer. Leave it 24 hours, then try booting it - it has been known to work in some cases.
 
I'm at Salford and our ISD (Information Services Division) bunch are usless.

They were bloody useless. Pig-headed and ignorant too.

When you have half of the Computing Science department telling you there is a problem with the computers, you should be inclined to believe them.

ISD would work much better if CS students ran it.
 
during a phone call to a tiscali "technical help specialist" i was informing him of how our connection had died and hadn't been fixed for 2 weeks despite being told several times it'd be fixed within 48 hours.

Me: Our internet is still not working and we havn't received a call from your engineers about getting it fixed.
Him: Ah sorry, can i just run through a few steps with you first.
Me: Its nothing in the house as nothings been changed and i've done these steps already.
Him: I can't continue until you've answered these questions.
Me: okay
Him: can you disconnect all devices from the phone line and only have your computer connected to the main BT socket, then tell me if its working?
Me: You do realise if i disconnect everything this phone call will be cut off.
Him: No, its alright the phones will still work, just connect your computer and remove every other filter and device from the line.
Me: This phone that i'm talking to you now is on the line, if i unplug it i can't talk to you anymore.
Him: Yes, you can tell me if the internet works after everything is unplugged.
Me: The phone call will be cut off, terminated, stopped, disconnected. DO you understand what i'm trying to say?
Him: Let me put you through to the engineer.

:confused:
 
They were bloody useless. Pig-headed and ignorant too.

When you have half of the Computing Science department telling you there is a problem with the computers, you should be inclined to believe them.

ISD would work much better if CS students ran it.
So true! Join the revolution. Vive la revolution. :cool:

@krisboats - LOL. Perhaps companies with support lines for technical stuff need a special keyword or phrase that us geeks use to skip the first-line support? We get through to them and they say, "How can I help you today?"

You just utter the keyword and they transfer you to the engineers rightaway.

"The monkey is in the open, the monkey is in the open"

"Transferring you now sir!"

:D
 
during a phone call to a tiscali "technical help specialist" i was informing him of how our connection had died and hadn't been fixed for 2 weeks despite being told several times it'd be fixed within 48 hours.

Me: Our internet is still not working and we havn't received a call from your engineers about getting it fixed.
Him: Ah sorry, can i just run through a few steps with you first.
Me: Its nothing in the house as nothings been changed and i've done these steps already.
Him: I can't continue until you've answered these questions.
Me: okay
Him: can you disconnect all devices from the phone line and only have your computer connected to the main BT socket, then tell me if its working?
Me: You do realise if i disconnect everything this phone call will be cut off.
Him: No, its alright the phones will still work, just connect your computer and remove every other filter and device from the line.
Me: This phone that i'm talking to you now is on the line, if i unplug it i can't talk to you anymore.
Him: Yes, you can tell me if the internet works after everything is unplugged.
Me: The phone call will be cut off, terminated, stopped, disconnected. DO you understand what i'm trying to say?
Him: Let me put you through to the engineer.

:confused:

Was it a foreign call centre?

I hate foreign call centre's - they're absolutley useless, nothing more than an excuse for said company to save money by employing monkeys that can barely string a sentence of English together trying their best to read off a script.
 
SiriusB - Just remembered something else about ISD. I'm in John Lester (student accommodation). To prove just how utterly dimwitted and useless ISD are I have a little story. If the Internet server(s) go down after 5pm on a Friday then the whole Uni has no Internet access over the weekend. Doesn't matter on campus but for all of us in student accommodation that's it. No Internet access until Monday morning sometime. And not before 11am at least!

Why? Well my contact at Uni told me that the server sometimes crashes and the server can't reset itself. No, someone has to actually be there at the weekend and turn the flipping thing off and back on again to restart the service. :rolleyes:

The number of times I've felt like walking down to ISD and saying, "Look I'm on a CS course, I know what I'm doing. Now give me some ruddy keys to the server room so I can turn the servers back on over the weekend since none of you won't be here then!"

:mad:
 
Technically not pc technical support, but I had a problem with Virtual Dj and downloading the update for vista. I had the login information in my inbox - which I'd had ever since creating an account at Christmas. So I tried it and failed, and then tried to register a new account but the 'submit' button didn't work. Now me being confident in Mozilla's technical expertise gave up and emailed their technical support saying something to the effect of, I have an account with you - gave information (username and password) - and it won't login, I cannot register a new account due to the button not working, please advise.
They wrote me an urgent email back saying, you do not have an account with us. Please register one.

I was a bit stumped at their stupidity, seeing as I had made sure it was obvious that I already had an account and could not create one. Finally I emailed the exact same thing back that I had written already only to have them respond with, please use microsoft internet explorer 5.5 or better. And funnily enough it worked. Now if I'd had that incling it would have been sorted ages ago but I didn't, strange how tech support works.
 
Was it a foreign call centre?

I hate foreign call centre's - they're absolutley useless, nothing more than an excuse for said company to save money by employing monkeys that can barely string a sentence of English together trying their best to read off a script.

Its tiscali, would it be anything but an overseas call centre? :p;):D

Another funny one was an indian woman in a hsbc call centre ringing me up out of the blue asking if i was going to pay the money into my overdrawn account anytime soon. I tried to explain that i hadn't used the card for anything in the past few months because i had no money on it, and that having just bought a new phone on my dads business package i wouldn't need to buy 3 phones from the carphone warehouse and 2 from 3 mobile. She didn't grasp the fact that someone had obviously obtained my details and wouldn't leave the phone call without hearing "yes i'll pay". I even hung up on her only to have her repeatedly call me back when she wouldn't take "i'll go into the branch in the morning and sort it out" (it was around 9.30pm) as an answer.

They did sort it for me though and gave me a new account, which was nice.
 
Technically not pc technical support, but I had a problem with Virtual Dj and downloading the update for vista. I had the login information in my inbox - which I'd had ever since creating an account at Christmas. So I tried it and failed, and then tried to register a new account but the 'submit' button didn't work. Now me being confident in Mozilla's technical expertise gave up and emailed their technical support saying something to the effect of, I have an account with you - gave information (username and password) - and it won't login, I cannot register a new account due to the button not working, please advise.
They wrote me an urgent email back saying, you do not have an account with us. Please register one.

I was a bit stumped at their stupidity, seeing as I had made sure it was obvious that I already had an account and could not create one. Finally I emailed the exact same thing back that I had written already only to have them respond with, please use microsoft internet explorer 5.5 or better. And funnily enough it worked. Now if I'd had that incling it would have been sorted ages ago but I didn't, strange how tech support works.
Do you really think you should give out your password? Even to the company that you have the account with....
 
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