Supermarket Etiquette

Youstolemyname

Youstolemyname

Youstolemyname

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What is it with supermarkets and a lack of manners? It's as though people's brains disengage the second they get in the door and basic regard for personal space and consideration for others goes out of the window. Here are just a couple of examples that I regularly encounter on my trips to the supermarket:

The Aisle Blocker
You know the one, the person who decides to block the aisle with their trolley. While reaching for a bottle of ragu with one hand, their other hand is on the trolley pushing it out into the isle for a counter-balance. Best way to deal with The Aisle Blocker is a swift ram of their trolley followed by a 'sorry' and a smarmy smile. This usually snaps them out of it and they realise how inconsiderate they are being.

The Shelf Blocker

Similar to The Aisle Blocker, The Shelf Blocker blocks the produce you want on the shelf with their trolley. Despite you plainly standing behind their trolley, gazing longingly at the box of Daz on the shelf, they pretend not to register you are there and carry on choosing between Vanish and Stain Devils for their skiddered undies as if their lives depended upon it. This time a trolley ram isn't needed, just a cough and a nod towards that elusive box of Daz does the trick followed by a thanks or a 'wink, nod, cheers mate' if The Shelf Blocker is a bloke.

The Phantom Trolley
A common sight. Totally abandoned without an owner to be seen, yet positioned just exactly where it is most inconvenient. You can usually navigate around it with some trolley skillz but if this isn't possible, a gentle trolley to trolley shunt deals with the issue. CAUTION!!!! Ensure that The Phantom Trolley does not belong to a ninja/ mobster before you shunt it and they are merely around the corner selecting some knitwear. They might beat you up!

The Chatters
These are the scurge of supermarkets across the country. What is it with people?? Aisles can barely fit two trolleys down side by side so do NOT block the isle by standing chunnering on about little Tarquin's performance in the school assembly. Easily dealt with but such an indication of stupidity, The Chatter is dispersed by simply approaching with the trolley and a look of anguish on your face. The Chatter soon realises their schoolboy error and either moves on or uses their own trolley skillz to create a gap.

The Unruly Child
A tough cookie to deal with. The Unruly Child sprints around isles, usually holding some sort of toy, causing mayhem. Un-rammable and uncontrollable, the best method to deal with The Unruly Child is to simply stop and wait till they have gone.

There are plenty more 'characters' in supermarkets, but why is it people just loose the basic ability to consider others on entering those doors?

/semi-rant over...
 
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What annoys me the most, is the jobless scum in there at lunch time spending their benefits on the cheap range foods for their kids then the premium booze for themselves, holding up the people who only have a set time for their lunch breaks.
 
I hate it when I am following my Mum down the central aisle at Morrisons and someone will appear suddenly from a side aisle and try to speed across the central aisle to the other side aisle.

I have to swerve to avoid a side on impact. :mad:

Don't I have right of way? We need traffic lights on side aisles in supermarkets I think. :p
 
Brilliant thread, I think a lot of people can relate to the inconsiderate people they all just go around in their own little world without any consideration for others :mad:

BeatMaster :D
 
What really gets my goat is the complete retards who can't read and start unpacking a trolley full of goods onto the 10 items or less checkout. Personally I wait until they're nearly finished unpacking and then make a point of pointing out their transgression.
 
Azagoth said:
What really gets my goat is the complete retards who can't read and start unpacking a trolley full of goods onto the 10 items or less checkout. Personally I wait until they're nearly finished unpacking and then make a point of pointing out their transgression.
Click to expand...
Excellent timing skills. :D
 
You forgot the elderly Coupon Champions who'll happily waste everyone's time arguing over 2 pence off offer that ran last week and is now no longer valid or something equally ridiculous.
 
Youstolemyname said:
The Unruly Child
A tough cookie to deal with. The Unruly Child sprints around isles, usually holding some sort of toy, causing mayhem. Un-rammable and uncontrollable, the best method to deal with The Nruly Child is to simply stop and wait till they have gone.
Click to expand...

Un-rammable? I beg to differ :p
 
What annoys me most is the speed at which people walk in and around supermarkets, FFS its not like a) there is a speed limit, and b) walking slower will somehow aid your braking distance to stop at the cucumbers.

:mad:
 
I try to avoid supermarkets at all times however this is impossible as we all know... but also have a thought to the staff that work there especially when you decide you don't want something put it back in the right place! I once worked at morrisons and nearly threw a box of weetabix at a customer after he threw a box back down the isle knocking half of the shelves i'd just spend 40 minutes stacking off. He said to me " I suppose you best clean that up" ******! This still bugs me even thought it was years ago so now I try and be polite and actually say hello or at least acknowledge the staff.... try it, read their name badges see how much that freaks them out..got me big time....

Aero
 
You forgot;

The Oldies - Always turn up at once even they they have nothing else to do

Rambos' - Want to get in and out (me!)

I now go shopping @ 7am as they normally have most products in stock, no old people, no moaning people, no other peoples kids and the wife doesnt want to go with me so saves money (she the oh its on offer so must gt one even though we'll never use it)
 
I like going shopping with my gran, she is 4'8 and deals with anyone in the supermarket. So I follow her down and she will spot something she wants, UP goes the walking stick in an extremely violent manner (normally just narrowly avoiding hitting someone). She will stand there waggling the stick at eye height until I've said "ok I'll get that for you".

Down walking stick! Another violent swing to the left in a downward direction and off she totters. I've seen 6ft+ blokes built like rugby players ducking to avoid the stick and she is able to clear an aisle as a kind of mini walking barricade :D

Trying to tell her to stop pointing results in more random stick waving. She doesn't realise she is doing it, but its still amusing :D
 
I forgot about the time I saw a person going around causing mayhem on a motorised outdoor scooter. Chugging around the shop causing untold problems jamming up the isles reversing and knocking into stacks, words failed me :p
 
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