The Awesomness Factor

Burnsy2023

Burnsy2023

Burnsy2023

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I was listening to my normal collection of postcasts and a new episode of Freakonomics came up. I love this show and they had a radio game show called "Tell me something I don't know" which had an interesting segment from a lady called Melissa Schneider.

You can listen from 28:30 here: http://freakonomics.com/2014/10/23/tell-me-something-i-dont-know-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast-2/

Basically the premise of the part of interest is that there was a study conducted in 2010 which surveyed 37,000 couples about what factors are related in long lasting relationships.

One of the conclusions of the study was that one of the overriding factors to couples who have high satisfaction later on in relationships is due to awesomeness perceptions of their partner (otherwise referred to as "positive illusions"). Basically, the more things that your partner does that you think are awesome, the stronger the bond. Obviously this needs to be a mutual thing for a lasting relationship but it got me thinking about my previous relationships. I also noticed another thread about partner's hobbies and some saying that their partner doesn't really have any hobbies. I wondered if this lack of passion perhaps affects the satisfaction of both of the people in the relationship.

So, to the purpose of the thread: What does your current partner do that you constantly think is awesome? Is it perhaps their lightning wit or passion on a certain subject? Perhaps you know that their really talented with a certain skill that you value? Maybe they are particularly good at talking to people or have an ability to reassure anyone? Whatever it is, post it here.

Citation to the original study: http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/...sCustomisedMessage=&userIsAuthenticated=false
 
is it bad that one of my longest relationships was based on the fact she could twitch her nose and acted really cute while pulling a cute face?

apparently i find adorableness awesome :/
 
One of my favourite things about my wife is that she is a 'creative type' that doesn't have the associated mental issues :p I like that she's from California so grew up with Hollywood next door, travelled all over the world working as a model and actress when younger and is now a screenwriter who likes to write action, horror and thriller movies so literally could not be more of a different background to me - which I think keeps things interesting.
 
Burnsy2023 said:
I was listening to my normal collection of postcasts and a new episode of Freakonomics came up. I love this show and they had a radio game show called "Tell me something I don't know" which had an interesting segment from a lady called Melissa Schneider.

You can listen from 28:30 here: http://freakonomics.com/2014/10/23/tell-me-something-i-dont-know-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast-2/

Basically the premise of the part of interest is that there was a study conducted in 2010 which surveyed 37,000 couples about what factors are related in long lasting relationships.

One of the conclusions of the study was that one of the overriding factors to couples who have high satisfaction later on in relationships is due to awesomeness perceptions of their partner (otherwise referred to as "positive illusions"). Basically, the more things that your partner does that you think are awesome, the stronger the bond. Obviously this needs to be a mutual thing for a lasting relationship but it got me thinking about my previous relationships. I also noticed another thread about partner's hobbies and some saying that their partner doesn't really have any hobbies. I wondered if this lack of passion perhaps affects the satisfaction of both of the people in the relationship.

So, to the purpose of the thread: What does your current partner do that you constantly think is awesome? Is it perhaps their lightning wit or passion on a certain subject? Perhaps you know that their really talented with a certain skill that you value? Maybe they are particularly good at talking to people or have an ability to reassure anyone? Whatever it is, post it here.

Citation to the original study: http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/...sCustomisedMessage=&userIsAuthenticated=false
Click to expand...

She's my Yang
 
She's a student Nurse and it's something I could never do because of the long hours, low pay and unpleasant nature of the job.
 
The term "positive illusions" I have a bit of a issue with. It implies that we are in some kind of non-rational delusion. As if other people would not see the things my partner does as being attractive?

Of course different people are attracted to different things but some qualities are pretty much universal across humans as being positive and desirable. From what others have said already I can totally empathise with them I don't think wow he must be under an illusion.

Many years ago I heard the phrase that was basically "for a relationship to work you have to look up to the other person". This works both ways and you need to make sure you put the work in so the other person looks up to you. When one looks down on the other that is when you have a problem. If you don't respect each other as individuals it will never work.
 
Burnsy2023 said:
So, to the purpose of the thread: What does your current partner do that you constantly think is awesome? Is it perhaps their lightning wit or passion on a certain subject? Perhaps you know that their really talented with a certain skill that you value? Maybe they are particularly good at talking to people or have an ability to reassure anyone? Whatever it is, post it here.

Citation to the original study: http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/...sCustomisedMessage=&userIsAuthenticated=false
Click to expand...


There is a lot truth in it to be honest. I know I'm blowing my trumpet here so forgive me.

Things my wife does that amaze me are:

She can speak 5 languages fluently - (English, Spanish, Russian, Latvian, German) - She is Russian but when I met her I thought she was English! Everyone is always really surprised when they find out :D

She is classically educated in Violin and Piano - I love it when she plays the piano especially, she can just pick up a piece of sheet music and start playing it as if she already knows it.

When we went for a weekend in Wales the guy who owned the B&B we were staying at was a conductor for the National Orchestra in Dubai and invited her to play with him to entertain our dinner guests in the evening, I was proud as punch and he basically got off the piano and said please play on your own I can't keep up LOL :D.

She has the body of a bikini model.

She is endlessly patient with our little rascal!

She likes a man to be a manly man, something which most British women I met in the past have a big problem with.

I'm a lucky git!
 
MookJong said:
The term "positive illusions" I have a bit of a issue with. It implies that we are in some kind of non-rational delusion. As if other people would not see the things my partner does as being attractive?
Click to expand...

The thing is, when you're in love, you don't see so many of the flaws and think that some of the positives are better than perhaps they actually are. The rose tinted glasses do have an effect on even reasonably universal traits.

MookJong said:
Many years ago I heard the phrase that was basically "for a relationship to work you have to look up to the other person". This works both ways and you need to make sure you put the work in so the other person looks up to you. When one looks down on the other that is when you have a problem. If you don't respect each other as individuals it will never work.
Click to expand...

That's kind of what this is getting at. There are certain traits that you respect or find particularly cool which means that you have this ongoing desire to be around someone.
 
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