My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday
So I went to our local pet shop and they were £70!!!
Blow this, I thought, I can get one cheaper off the web.
Paddy says "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador .
”Bugger that” says Mick "have you seen how many of their owners go Blind?"
Local Police hunting the 'knitting needle nutter' who has stabbed six people in the bum in the last 48 hours,they believe the attacker could be following some kind of pattern.
I was at an ATM yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
I start a new job in Seoul next week.
I thought it was a good Korea move.
Bought some 'rocket salad' yesterday,
But it went off before I could eat it!
My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning,
Can you believe that, 2:30am?!
Luckily for him I was still up playing my Bagpipes.
I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the
biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on.
I said "You're pulling my leg!"
The wife was counting all the 1p's and 2p's out on the kitchen table when she suddenly got very angry and started shouting and crying for no reason.
I thought to myself, "She's going through the change."
When I was in the pub I heard a couple of plonkers saying that they wouldn’t feel safe on an aircraft if they knew the pilot was a woman.
What a pair of sexists.
I mean, it's not as if she'd have to reverse the bloody thing!
So I went to our local pet shop and they were £70!!!
Blow this, I thought, I can get one cheaper off the web.
Paddy says "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador .
”Bugger that” says Mick "have you seen how many of their owners go Blind?"
Local Police hunting the 'knitting needle nutter' who has stabbed six people in the bum in the last 48 hours,they believe the attacker could be following some kind of pattern.
I was at an ATM yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
I start a new job in Seoul next week.
I thought it was a good Korea move.
Bought some 'rocket salad' yesterday,
But it went off before I could eat it!
My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning,
Can you believe that, 2:30am?!
Luckily for him I was still up playing my Bagpipes.
I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the
biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on.
I said "You're pulling my leg!"
The wife was counting all the 1p's and 2p's out on the kitchen table when she suddenly got very angry and started shouting and crying for no reason.
I thought to myself, "She's going through the change."
When I was in the pub I heard a couple of plonkers saying that they wouldn’t feel safe on an aircraft if they knew the pilot was a woman.
What a pair of sexists.
I mean, it's not as if she'd have to reverse the bloody thing!
![[FnG]magnolia](/styles/overclockers/avatars/9.png){kind=avatar}
