Does the thought of that not scare the crap out of you and make you take action to sort your life out?
To Desire, Yet Not "Do". Hmph!
- Thread starter SpicyDuck
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Does the thought of that not scare the crap out of you and make you take action to sort your life out?
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Well, try working out what you want to do, then go and do it.
It might be that you are just in a rut. Having fun over in China for a year, and maybe you feel that you've achieved nothing because you are now right back to where you were 12 months ago. Or it might actually be some sort of depression. I'd suggest going to your doctors and having a chat with them. They may brush you off, give you some "happy" pills (which isn't the best solution, as it doesn't solve the root problem), or get them to suggest some kind of councelling.
Move to London where there are actually jobs to get, live in a flat share for cheap as chips rent at start, enjoy crazy-ass life for a couple of years before finding your feet and settling into an enjoyable life.
It's what most early-mid 20s people you meet working in London have done, it's just having the balls to actually do it.
It's what most early-mid 20s people you meet working in London have done, it's just having the balls to actually do it.
You need to have the impetus to do the things you want.
Some people get it in the form of kids - doing the work so they can support/leave something for their kids.
Some people do it for money to get the lifestyle they want.
Some people do it to be successful in the eyes of others.
Some people do nothing, because they ahve no goal.
What you need is a goal to aim for.
he-man may want to drive the car, but before he even has the wheels he needs to know where he is going. Wheels are not the issue, its the destination.
Set yourself a goal that is bigger than yourself and you will have the motivation, I find the best goal is something that does not benefit you directly, but will benefit you indirectly.
Some people get it in the form of kids - doing the work so they can support/leave something for their kids.
Some people do it for money to get the lifestyle they want.
Some people do it to be successful in the eyes of others.
Some people do nothing, because they ahve no goal.
What you need is a goal to aim for.
he-man may want to drive the car, but before he even has the wheels he needs to know where he is going. Wheels are not the issue, its the destination.
Set yourself a goal that is bigger than yourself and you will have the motivation, I find the best goal is something that does not benefit you directly, but will benefit you indirectly.
I agree, don't listen to these people saying you are depressed, most people don't find life easy, especially if you want to make something of it.
As said above you need a goal, you did what you wanted but it was cut short, you are going to feel slightly disheartened. just think again what you want to acheive.
For me it is noithing quite so exciting. My aim in life for now is to get as much money as possible for a house and then the saga continues but like you I moved away and back and now I am going crazy!
As said above you need a goal, you did what you wanted but it was cut short, you are going to feel slightly disheartened. just think again what you want to acheive.
For me it is noithing quite so exciting. My aim in life for now is to get as much money as possible for a house and then the saga continues but like you I moved away and back and now I am going crazy!
It scares me senseless and it does make me want to do something. I guess, as has been said above, I just don't know what that is.
The worst thing is, I could be doing freelance web development right now, which I love, and earning at least £200 per week. Although not much, it's £200 more than I get now. The thing is, despite loving it and wanting the money, I don't do it.
So actually, doing something I love and would consider an option, is something I still don't do. It's absolute madness in my mind. Especially when I consider the debt I have.
The conclusion I get from this, as horrible as it is to admit it, is that I'm a chronic lazy ******.
It's embarrassing really. How can a guy be against the sort of person/attitude that he see's quite often, yet be that person himself?
This thread is like a discussion with a psychologist.
Seems to me you have no goal, once you had your goal to go to China. Now you reached the goal and completed it, you have nothing to work towards.
think about what goals you want to reach by the end of next month, then 6 months, then 1 year, then 5 then 10.
it matters not that you wont achieve them (e.g. you may change your mind, find a new passion etc.) what matters is that you ahve a target to aim for, whilst you are figuring out what you want to do.
think about what goals you want to reach by the end of next month, then 6 months, then 1 year, then 5 then 10.
it matters not that you wont achieve them (e.g. you may change your mind, find a new passion etc.) what matters is that you ahve a target to aim for, whilst you are figuring out what you want to do.
You don't need to know what 'it' is you should be doing. Do something rather than nothing. If it doesn't work out, scrap it and start something else. Not everyone knows what they want to do in life and the only way to truly find out what you want to do is if you do it and realise.
Hey!
I see you're back from China and hope all is well.
From what I understand you don't feel fondly of your family over some issues, which is a shame. I hope that is right and I haven't remembered the wrong person.
From what it seems you don't have drive even though you said that, you are telling yourself you can do what you want to do. On top of that you are missing the China experience and clinging on to it.
You, like everyone else just want a purpose or an aim to work towards. The thing is no one going to give you it, you have to ask yourself and find out yourself what that is. From there you will know what to do.
The only wedge stopping you is yourself, you need to just push yourself out there. Do you think you're great at designing? Then look up career paths in that area, go for an interview, talk with people in that area, etc just to give you that feel of actually doing something. You may find it is a hard task to do but once you do it you'll be happy.
If you change the way you are feeling right now and then the feeling comes back that stops you don't let it beat you down.
Realistically rememeber we all want a job or career path we enjoy or love. People will tell you they have achieved that and others won't, what you need to focus on is what you want, even write it down and see how you can get there or at least fit the requirement enough to make you think it is worthwhile.
You just have to push yourself or you will never really know.
I see you're back from China and hope all is well.
From what I understand you don't feel fondly of your family over some issues, which is a shame. I hope that is right and I haven't remembered the wrong person.
From what it seems you don't have drive even though you said that, you are telling yourself you can do what you want to do. On top of that you are missing the China experience and clinging on to it.
You, like everyone else just want a purpose or an aim to work towards. The thing is no one going to give you it, you have to ask yourself and find out yourself what that is. From there you will know what to do.
The only wedge stopping you is yourself, you need to just push yourself out there. Do you think you're great at designing? Then look up career paths in that area, go for an interview, talk with people in that area, etc just to give you that feel of actually doing something. You may find it is a hard task to do but once you do it you'll be happy.
If you change the way you are feeling right now and then the feeling comes back that stops you don't let it beat you down.
Realistically rememeber we all want a job or career path we enjoy or love. People will tell you they have achieved that and others won't, what you need to focus on is what you want, even write it down and see how you can get there or at least fit the requirement enough to make you think it is worthwhile.
You just have to push yourself or you will never really know.
Living at home may be part of the problem. It means you don't have to do things to live. Irrespective of getting sacked, while away in China you did stuff. Doesn't really matter what that stuff was, but you did it. Time perhaps, as Scuzi says, to ditch that comfort zone and consider how and when you can afford to move out.
Coming from a fellow designer it sounds like you are using market saturation as an excuse not to do anything. There are **** loads of jobs out there you just have to look for them, they won't come to you!
Rich_L has hit the nail on the head. If you want to be a designer move to where the design work is. Get yourself a portfolio together and start applying for placements, once you have some in-house experience you can get into a full time job and the ball will keep rolling.
Your experiences in China will be valuable as well because not only can us use them to inform you design, you will have knowledge of another culture that very few other designers will have which makes you a very valuable person.
Panzer
Rich_L has hit the nail on the head. If you want to be a designer move to where the design work is. Get yourself a portfolio together and start applying for placements, once you have some in-house experience you can get into a full time job and the ball will keep rolling.
Your experiences in China will be valuable as well because not only can us use them to inform you design, you will have knowledge of another culture that very few other designers will have which makes you a very valuable person.
Panzer
I was kind of similar to you and Scuzi really, I finished uni and didn't really know what to do and was bumming around, working in pizza hut and living with my parents. I really wasn't happy as I knew I was wasting my life so decided to up sticks and move to Prague. Get out of your comfort zone, jump in the deep end or whatever you want to call it is a good way to kick start you because you have to do something pro active just to survive. If the worst happens and you have no money you could go home to your parents and sort things out but could you face that failure? That is what motivated me, the desire not to fail, not because my family would riddicule me but because of my own pride 
It's paid off now as I have a reasonable job and should have an interview for a cracking job on friday and anyone can do it. I'm a lazy bugger really and I did it
I know exactly how you feel as I was there and as cliche as it sounds only you can change it. Good luck though
It's paid off now as I have a reasonable job and should have an interview for a cracking job on friday and anyone can do it. I'm a lazy bugger really and I did it
I know exactly how you feel as I was there and as cliche as it sounds only you can change it. Good luck though
Soldato
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Same situation here (kind of)
(kind of)
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Soldato
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get a girl
I agree and reckon your own place will sort you out. All the best.
Moving away from England again, or at least Liverpool, has been something I've thought about before I even came back home. Maybe, somewhere inside, because I knew I'd get stuck in this same old rut.
Even if I wanted to, I have a very bad financial situation that needs sorting out first. Being in debt is a major player in not being motivated. I hate it.
And again, after that (and especially if going to London), I'd need to save a whole bunch of cash to get me going.
I'd die a very happy man if I had a job in which I used my creative abilities. It's what I live for really. Paying my way through life via a passion - jeez, I'd have to set aside time each week to go outside hugging people.
Col_M, do you mind if I ask what you do in Prague?
Even if I wanted to, I have a very bad financial situation that needs sorting out first. Being in debt is a major player in not being motivated. I hate it.
And again, after that (and especially if going to London), I'd need to save a whole bunch of cash to get me going.
I'd die a very happy man if I had a job in which I used my creative abilities. It's what I live for really. Paying my way through life via a passion - jeez, I'd have to set aside time each week to go outside hugging people.
Col_M, do you mind if I ask what you do in Prague?