Yes, I use one sometimes, and I am a man. No, I'm not gay, dumbasses. Frankly, I'm baffled by some of the things people associate with being gay. Are umbrellas big in the gay community? Get a life.
I do think umbrellas are by and large utter crap, though. Come on, this is 2011! Why do they still break all the damn time? Surely we can design a better one.