What would you do?

Aedus · 19 Apr 2010 at 15:52

After months and months of fighting it, my cousin is on her last legs with terminal cancer, expected to die sometime this week (Will be lucky to make it to Wednesday). Something which I first asked myself is "Would I let myself get into such a state where I can't do anything and I don't know what's going on around me?" which seems to have sparked a debate in the family.

From my view, if I had a terminal condition and there was no possible way to recover from it, I'd want to fly abroad and go with euthanasia, firstly so I can say "Goodbye" to everyone properly and not in a drugged up state when it gets towards the end of the terminal period, and secondly so people remember me as how I am, not messed up where I can barely do the things everyone does daily, like walking and making yourself some tea. The thing is, everyone in the family seems to think this is "Wrong" and you should fight the illness until your last breath even if there is no chance of you ever recovering from it.

This has been playing on my mind for a while, so i ask: What would you guys do if it came to that? Would you stay fighting till the end, or would you opt out and at least be happy to tell everyone you loved a last goodbye?

P.s. Sorry for the depressive topic
P.p.s. I don't want pity, just your views of what you would do

platypus · 19 Apr 2010 at 15:55

I'd say goodbye to a few people, do a few things I'd always wanted to do and then head off somewhere to die in peace.

Sorry to hear about your situation.

Freefaller · 19 Apr 2010 at 15:58

I can't even begin to imagine being in that situation (i.e. me being terminally ill), but have been in similar situation to you (i.e. someone close being terminally ill).

I'd like to say that I'd want to be taken away so that I could die in dignity and peace - but I honestly can't say what I'd be like - maybe hold onto any / all hope and strength I could get from others...

Sorry to hear you're in that awful situation. Hope that no matter what happens your cousin is able to pass away with peace and not too much pain.

scorza · 19 Apr 2010 at 16:03

Sorry to hear about your cousin

I think it's very easy to say "oh I'll just suicide if this ever happens to me" (I think that myself at times), but if it actually happens to you it's probably not as easy as that. I think your attitude would change and you'd want to spend every second your remaining time with your loved ones etc.

Aedus · 19 Apr 2010 at 16:14

Yeah I kinda see that you can't judge so much unless you're put into that position, it's too much to get your head around, but ultimately I think I'd rather go in peace than in pain at the end, not knowing or being able to do anything. Maybe doing a few things like platypus for a few months, and when your condition starts to take a turn for the worst say "Enough is enough".

Greenlizard0 · 19 Apr 2010 at 16:21

Woah can of worms everywhere.

I'd take the euthanasia option everytime e.g. in Switzerland. Half a loaf of bread isn't always better than no loaf at all.

Mucky_Pup · 19 Apr 2010 at 16:24

When I eventually get round to writing my living will, degeneration of motor functions with no chance of returning to normallity, loss of ability to communicate, move etc. terminal disease, due to illness, or a serious accident etc. etc. = travel to place where it can be ended, if that fails then refusal of treatment, refusual of sustinance.

There is quite a difference between being alive, and merely exisiting; is one of my motto's to live by.

Narj · 19 Apr 2010 at 16:27

Dignitas tbh. I've seen a few relatives die in a right old state over the past few years and don't want to go through it myself

krooton · 19 Apr 2010 at 16:32

My grandad on my mother's side suffered from lung and pancreatic cancer. He was also obese, got gangrene in one of his legs and had to have it amputated. He was a miserable old man (was so long before becoming ill), and being terminally ill and wheelchair ridden only fuelled his general state of being.

Even though his own life was hellish for the final few months, he still fought on.

My mum reckons that the human will to survive is surprisingly strong, and you never really know what you would do until you are in that position.