Women seem stupid... should I try men?

Jono

Jono

Jono

Man of Honour
Joined
18 Oct 2002
Posts
13,262
Location
Northallerton/Harrogate
After reading the myriad threads today about how awful/retarded women are - and having had a few bad experiences of my own in the not-too-distant past, should I try being gay?

I'm not really sure how to start out... I mean, I've heard of these things referred to as "Big Gay Bears" which I assume are the larger, hairier sort of gay person... but I don't think I want to be one of those.
Does one need to start shaving/waxing body hear to be accepted by the gay community, what about wrist limpness and voice?

I have quite a manly voice and I don't wave my hands around when I speak. Should I start practicing.

Also general movement - getting from point A to point B... should I be mincing?

OH it's so confusing...and I thought women were complicated.

So yeah, any advice on how to be gay would be most appreciated. I don't really like babycham, is that going to cause me problems?
 
Capn' $qu!ff said:
*Sees thread*
.....?.....
*opens and reads thread*
....?!?!?....
*leaves disgusted*
Click to expand...

Tease! :p
Mind you some of the things I've read (not in the OP) caused me to make a noise like sideshow bob in the stepping on rakes scene....
 
ICEx21 said:
When you do become his new partner Lysander...bash Jonos pastie in good and proper.
Also remember to apply mustard to penetrating body parts for saying "NOT LIKE THIS LYSANDER!"
Click to expand...

I DO NOT WANT ANYONE PUNCHING MY DOUGHNUT!

:(:(:(:(
 
Seems there are a lot of confused people in this thread. Perhaps the following will help...

The following questions will help you decide whether or not you are
gay:

1. It is your bedtime. What do you do with your pillow?
a) Sleep on it.
b) Bite it.

2. You have been offered two positions at a fudge factory? Which do
you take?
a) Producer.
b) Packer.

3. If you were a ferret, what would be your favourite food?
a) Grubs and beetles.
b) Chutney.

4. You are a jockey. What is your preferred steed?
a) A horse.
b) A sausage.

5. Imagine you are attacked by an aggressive piece of chocolate.
Would you:
a) Melt it.
b) Stab it.

6. You are a butcher's boy. How do you deliver your meat?
a) Proudly at the front door.
b) Furtively up the back passage.

7. Your garden is on a slope. How do you perform the weeding?
a) Downhill.
b) Uphill.

8. Imagine a shirt is in your way. How would you move it?
a) Manfully discard it from your path.
b) Lift it.

9. As a keen sportsman, how do you like javelins?
a) Thrown by old boilers like Fatima Whitbread.
b) Made of spam.

10. You want to learn a musical instrument. What do you decide to
play?
a) Piano.
b) Pink oboe.

11. As a marine biologist, what is your favourite creature?
a) A sea anenome.
b) A chocolate starfish.

12. You are a miner. What do you mine?
a) Coal.
b) Marmite.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom