Does anyone else struggle day by day, week by week with work?

Caporegime
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A lot of jobs are going this way, race to the bottom mentality, and because of the stress of life outside of work for the majority, it's also leading to worse office politics, with managers etc even more on edge.

I don't hate my current role at all, but a change in management last year has turned certain parts of it into a chore.

A change in government will likely mean a big shakeup in our sector.
 
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Soldato
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Collections as in debt collection department? 12h shifts of trying to extract money from financially screwed people sounds like punishment.

Almost everyone works for the money but it's gotta be something you can stand doing.
 
Man of Honour
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it isn't a good fit for me, and I am investing a lot of energy in trying to make a half decent job of it with little success.

I'm starting to wake up at 4am thinking about work, which is not usual for me, and when I get to the end of the day I'm completely mentally exhausted.
I don't feel like I'm particularly valuable or effective and this is completely different to how I'm used to feeling about my job.
I've felt similarly at times; it's this weird variant of imposter syndrome I've yet to come up with a good moniker for that isn't about your ability to do a given role, or your confidence to do that role as you'd expect with traditional IS, but just a general feeling that you know you can add more value than you are within the confines of your role and level of exposure at the organisation. Until the end of 2020 I was in a role which was very stressful due to the relentless workload but I also felt I contributed a huge amount, since then I've had I guess more 'junior' (in relative terms) roles that have paid more and none of them I think have fully exploited my strengths. I'm the type of person that feels almost like a charlatan if I'm doing a bang-average job of stuff outside my sweet spot even if the feedback suggests people are happy with my work, because I know I'm capable of so much more, and am getting paid a lot more than when I was doing a better job. It's probably like when elite sportsmen are asked to play out of position, they are talented enough that they can still put in a 6-7/10 performance and it works well for the overall team, but the individual player is left feeling something is missing because they are used to putting out 8-9/10 in their preferred role.

I also think this sort of affliction is more likely for experienced workers because they have the context of where they've excelled in the past whereas younger folk don't really know much different. That's where the mental energy is getting drained because you know you've put pegs in round holes in the past but this time you've got a square peg instead of a round one so you're having to shave bits off to get it to fit.

In general I've sort of resigned myself to the fact that it's better to get paid well to deliver little in a relatively stress-free environment rather than slog my guts out for less financial reward even if I get less mental satisfaction from my output. And in doing so I'm taking my foot off the gas a bit which is good for my mental health but means I'm unlikely to rip up any trees or exceed expectations for my core role.

In your case, if you are genuinely not enjoying it rather than just having a feeling of malaise, and don't have a light at the end of the tunnel in terms of role change / different projects etc, I'd probably just look for the next opportunity, don't be swayed by the fact that you have good feedback because good workers can get good feedback in numerous roles of varying degrees of appeal "great job today, all those toilets were spotless!".
 
Man of Honour
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You've summarised, very eloquently, almost exactly how I feel.

I'm probably (given the feedback, must be?) doing a decent job, but it feels like a 6 or 7/10 result, with me expending a great deal of effort - whereas I'm used to achieving an 8 or 9/10 result with comparatively little effort.

As you say, not traditional imposter syndrome though I've had brushes with that as well - as have many I would imagine.

The additional levels of effort I'm expending right now are likely because I'm (to use your football analogy) playing out of position, and I feel I have to overwork to compensate for what I feel to be my ineffectiveness in the role I'm currently playing.

I'll keep my eyes open and see how this plays out over the coming weeks, because I'm not keen on feeling this way at work, and would rather be operating where I know I'm most effective.

In football terms again, my normal role is a classical number 10 - that's where I'm most effective, productive, and that's what feels rewarding - but at the moment I'm playing in a holding midfield role, and feeling I might lose my grip on the control of the game if I drift off for even a moment.
 
Soldato
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I hate the corporate world now. I find the whole thing pretty soul destroying if you allow it to be. Now, I have the biggest boundaries going. I do nothing outside of my 9-5. I'm not thinking one iota about anything work related at work and don't even let myself get drawn into ******** while in meetings, regardless of my opinion and thoughts on how something should be done. It's just not worth the energy in the end.
Of course I've been doing things on the side for a while now.
Testing things, trying them out to see what could replace that $$ keeping me in that place.
I still don't know for sure what it'll be, but I keep testing with some pretty OK success. Of course, you just want 10x that to live a life I do. I don't think it's impossible at all though.

I'd rather dance to the beat of my own drum, than be told when to dance and to what.
My measure on this planet isn't by my job title. No one really gives two ***** what your boring ass job title is. You are more than a sum of your "career" but a sum of who you are as a person and that more often than not, gets lost when you find yourself stuck in the monotony of daily work / life.
 
Associate
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I suppose I am lucky in a way. Working in IT has always been something I have wanted to do so getting up for work or generally going to work doesn't bother me that much. What does bother me is the crazy increases of everything even on my 100k salary with a family of 7 I have no spare income what so ever after bills and children requirements I am left with a couple of hundred quid for the month which usually goes on things throughout the month, it never use to be this way 2 or 3 years ago. Having only a single income to the household hurts.

So yes I feel your pain in some respect if you don't actually like the work you do, and I know I am on a large salary but I also have 5 kids to support. I feel like I am working for nothing (luxuries for myself, maybe that's a bit selfish!) which can get you down.
 
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Soldato
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10 Jun 2003
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Nottingham
Get your vitamin D levels checked, or start supplementing.

I've been going through exactly the same for the last few years. I wouldn't say I was considering suicide but I was definitely thinking that I don't want to be here anymore. I was reluctant to go to the doctors as they'll automatically subscribe anti-depressants.

I didn't get my levels checked but just started taking a high dosage of Vitamin D and it has made a HUGE difference to how I'm feeling. A genuinely unbelievable difference.
  • Sleeping much better
  • Waking up in a good mood, even on a Monday which I notoriously hated up until now.
  • I've more energy throughout the day, and I've been getting up at 5:30am to go to the gym 3 times a week.
  • Clearer head which means I've more focus and I'm getting more done at work and home.
  • And absolutely zero suicidal thoughts.
The only side effect so far is I'm a bit more clogged up which isn't a bad thing for me. All of the anxiety I've been experiencing lately has made my stomach turn things into mush :D - apparently depression and anxiety are heavily linked to your stomach / bowel.

I'm not going to recommend a dosage but all I will say is don't settle for the supermarket / H&B tablets. Do your own research into how much and come to your own conclusion.
 
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Man of Honour
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21 Feb 2006
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29,326
Vitamin D to one side, if you fear going to work each Sunday, something I did early in my career, then it's time to change role or move company. Whilst I am an advocate for Vitamin D and aware the issues deficiency can create, it is highly unlikely to resolve our OP's issues and most issues like this in my experience.

So start planning a change and focus on the next job would be my advice. Often these feelings come from lack of control, lack of influence, the inability to change circumstance and spiral down from there. I get it, been there and acted as I suggested. Went out and found something better and more suited.
 
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