Sundays Joke

A guy walks into a bar with a dog and orders a pint.
The barman turns to him and says "Im sorry but I cant serve you"
"Why?" says the man.
"We dont allow dogs into the bar" says the barman
"Oh!!" exclaims the man
"We only allow guide dogs for the blind into the bar" adds the barman
"Then he's my guide dog" explains the man
"He's not your guide dog" laughs the barman
"Why do you say that?" asks the man
"Because guide dogs are usually labradors or german shepherds" shouts the barman.
"Ah" replies the man "So what have they given me?
 
Mr. Heisenberg is driving on a motorway when a police officer stopped him for speeding. the policeman walks up to Heisenberg's car and asks him, "Sir, do you know how fast you are going?" Mr. Heisenberg replies "Officer, I have no idea how fast I am going, but I know exactly where I am."




*Awaits a thousand groans and one :D*
 
Sonea Fifer said:
The old lady replies "Well i hope your hungry, they cut my electric off this morning" ;)
Click to expand...

"A lack of electricity does not prove or disprove that this vacuum cleaner is so damn good. I'll return when the electricity is turned back on.", says the salesman.

:p
 
Trifid said:
Mr. Heisenberg is driving on a motorway when a police officer stopped him for speeding. the policeman walks up to Heisenberg's car and asks him, "Sir, do you know how fast you are going?" Mr. Heisenberg replies "Officer, I have no idea how fast I am going, but I know exactly where I am."
Click to expand...

I am uncertain whether I should laugh at that *boom boom titsh*
 
Trifid said:
Mr. Heisenberg is driving on a motorway when a police officer stopped him for speeding. the policeman walks up to Heisenberg's car and asks him, "Sir, do you know how fast you are going?" Mr. Heisenberg replies "Officer, I have no idea how fast I am going, but I know exactly where I am."
Click to expand...

Ah, quantum mechanics. Where would we be without it >_>
 
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