views on casual 'arrangements'

PurpleDinosaur said:
Just don't be hurt when he finds someone else mate. :)
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Erm I go for women mate for a start.

Secondly, eh? Why would I get hurt if we're both reading from the same page? If we're both in the same place as I have been with other women in the same situation. I believe in monogamy too when the right woman has come along or when the situation was right - just because two consenting adults can't have a bit of fun along the way doesn't make it immature, wrong or anything else.

Some kids on here really have a blinkered view. It's not for everyone I admit, and not everyone enjoys or wants this sort of casual arrangement - but because others can and want it doesn't mean anyone has to get hurt or not enjoy it neither does it make it wrong. This is not about cheating or being unfaithful since there are no strings attached.
 
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wow its still going, and even more viewpoints!! :)

FWIW i NEVER thought i'd ever be the kind of person to be capable of a casual sex arrangement but to be honest... i dont have the time or the money for a proper girlfriend and she's not going to be around for much longer so it was always going to end - hence the casual side.

i'm a sucker for getting in a bit too deep even though i try not too. i've been hurt a couple of times and it sucks. this time i wont let myself get hurt and i suppose in a way its helped me as i just dont care any more. what will be will be.

but yes.. women are a lot more open to the possibility of it than i thought. so much so i already have another couple in place for when current one is gone. :)
 
helpimcrap said:
but yes.. women are a lot more open to the possibility of it than i thought. so much so i already have another couple in place for when current one is gone. :)
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LOL what the hell? What do you do go around asking people "Hello there, would you be interested in casual sex every so often? Yes? Ok I'll put you down in the queue. You're 3rd in line, ok darling? Bye!"
 
Mephisto said:
LOL what the hell? What do you do go around asking people "Hello there, would you be interested in casual sex every so often? Yes? Ok I'll put you down in the queue. You're 3rd in line, ok darling? Bye!"
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lol not really.... i honestly have no idea how i got myself into this. :confused: i'm a 1 woman guy though so no 2 timing for me whether its casual or not. only exception to that is a 3 some with another girl. ;)
 
Casual sex is great and for relatively short periods it works well in my experience. The longer it goes on though the more chance of someone getting emotionally attached and thus making things extremely difficult. Luckily though I've not had that happen yet :D

helpimcrap said:
lol not really.... i honestly have no idea how i got myself into this. :confused: i'm a 1 woman guy though so no 2 timing for me whether its casual or not. only exception to that is a 3 some with another girl. ;)
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If it's a proper casual relationship there should be no issues with going with other people, surely :confused:
 
helpimcrap said:
just doesnt feel right in my eyes. plus i dont like the idea of STI's etc around nowadays so i dont take the risk.
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Fair enough. It just seems really strange to me to have a no strings attached, sex only relationship with a lass but then commit to being only with her. But hey, horses for courses and all that :)

As for STIs, wear a welly.
 
LordSplodge said:
Men are capable of forming and do form emotional bonds and fall in love with women who they are "just having sex" with. Men, however, are rubbish at talking about how they feel and would much rather spout rubbish about wanting to just screw as many women as possible.

Sure it is fun to have a bit of uncommitted sex but it is as easy for the man to fall for her as it is the other way round.

Most men on an Internet forum are going to take the hardcore male line as it is the expected thing, even if behind the keyboard they are a caring sensitive man.

In my opinion having just sex is like having steak and just steak for dinner every day. Sure it's great but after a few meals it becomes hollow. It's not until you have the steak, chips and vegetables that you realise how good the meal is.

It is the same with sex. Sure you can do things that make your mother blush but without the emotional attachment it is just steak without the trimmings. In other words incomplete.

However for the very short term it can be fun just watch that you don't get hurt - badly. Takes some recovering when it happens.
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Sounds totally the opposite (to me anyways) from my only open relationship experience.
I DID tell I loved her and all that but I was lying.
It worked for a year and a half and at no time whatsoever did it get boring, if anything, it was getting better and better.
I wasn't the one to get attached at the end though.
We both said at the beginning "lets just see where it goes".. well she went in a different direction to me. :D
She hasn't spoken to me since I said it was over, which is a shame. :(
 
nokinidea said:
I DID tell I loved her and all that but I was lying.
It worked for a year and a half and at no time whatsoever did it get boring, if anything, it was getting better and better.
I wasn't the one to get attached at the end though.
We both said at the beginning "lets just see where it goes".. well she went in a different direction to me. :D
She hasn't spoken to me since I said it was over, which is a shame. :(
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God, I don't blame her. You strung her along for over a year, she thought it was love, and it turns out it wasn't? Struggling not to insult you - the poor girl.
 
sara said:
God, I don't blame her. You strung her along for over a year, she thought it was love, and it turns out it wasn't? Struggling not to insult you - the poor girl.
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afraid i have to agree with you in that i'd never say the word love unless i thought it was. only said it once and that went south. :o

stringing along is not for me although i do understand why people do it. open and honest is always my way - hence i dont get many opportunities lol. not everyone appreciates open and honest. :o
 
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