married women tells me she loves me

Dont do it .. Think of the kid

My wife comes from a split family and it is a royal pain having to split our holidays between both parents etc so they can see the grandkids
 
DampCat said:
You only live once
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So does her husband. Being cheated on is potentially life ruining, but could quite easily derail someone's life for a year - with all the depression, anger and lack of trust in people.

She should at least have a clean breakup before doing anything with him, and show a little consideration for another human being.

It's double standards isn't it - being pretty two-faced, if you're allowed to sleep with someone else's wife but you wouldn't allow someone else to sleep with yours. And even if you would, it's still not as simple as that.

Just do things properly and have respect for other people - be aware of more than your groin tells you to be. I can understand it being a bit of fun or whatever, but "just one night" or a messy breakup could have a hugely negative impact on someone else. And I think you should care about that.

You'd think I've been cheated on before by the way I'm going on about it..! :p (I haven't)
 
Actually if my wife chose to be with someone else then it's her decision. What is double standards and two faced with you is not to me. If my wife felt that she needed to be with someone else to make her happy then so be it. That's what she needs. Sure i'd be upset but i'm not going to kill myself over it. That's life. It happens. Not everyone is destined to be together. Even 10 or 20 years into a relationship. I am well aware that there may be someone out there who is better for my girlfriend than i am, but right now i don't care because i'm enjoying the time i have. If we stay together, awesome... cause i love her a lot. If we don't, than that's a part of life. I'll move on eventually. I'm not heartless, i'm realistic.

You're right about messy breakups. And yes, her husband does deserve the respect of them breaking up before she cheats. I don't wish heartache upon anyone. But i stand by my above sentence.


(i should add that if my wife did cheat on me i -would- break up with her.. i dont think i made that clear pre-edit)
 
DampCat said:
Actually if my wife chose to be with someone else then it's her decision. What is double standards and two faced with you is not to me. If my wife felt that she needed to be with someone else to make her happy then so be it. That's what she needs. Sure i'd be upset but i'm not going to kill myself over it. That's life. It happens. Not everyone is destined to be together. Even 10 or 20 years into a relationship. I am well aware that there may be someone out there who is better for my girlfriend than i am, but right now i don't care because i'm enjoying the time i have.
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Indeed. I think people who expect their relationship to last for ever are naive. Great if it does, and you're extremely lucky if it does.

In most cases however, people change. I hope that if I ever get married, my wife and I would be able to realise that and if and when the situation arrived still be friends, if not for our sakes for the childrens if there were anyway.

And similarly Damp, I'm really enjoying my relationship at the moment. I know if we break up I'll be hurting, but I'd get over it. Enjoy it whilst it lasts - that isn't of course to say start taking things for granted.
 
platypus said:
As much as would hate being cheated on by my wife (I've had a girlfriend cheat on me in the past so I have some experience of it..), I've always wanted to rodger a married woman. Just because I think she'd be desperate, gagging for it, and up for anything. Not sure I'd actually do it though.
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Most married women are either old, fat, or both. They are also mostly interested in Gardening or Crochet rather than sitting on yor face or bouncing off your old man.

Still if ever a young married hottie comes your way can you give her my number? ;)
 
HITMAN_LEON said:
The truth is I most probably will never get alpha on him because I have what he dose not have and that is considerstion for the feelings of others. I know his sister and his niece, his niece is my youngest daughters best friend they are both 4yo. His mum and dad are nice people too and I would not like them upset in any way. I am angry and I won't deny any of of that but I have distanced myself from taking the wrong approach. As much as I say i would like to break him into pieces I have more reason not to. His niece dotes on him and I could not hurt her or his mum and dad by getting alpha and busting him up. I vent my anger in the gym and im no gym monkey either but I have to do something to stop myself climbing the walls.

I know how much of a coward he is, I went out for a drink one night with him he caused some trouble and a neanderthal took exception. He said lets get back inside, I stayed, not for a fight but out of curiosity to see this 19yo who had put his foot in his mouth by talking trash to some guy squirm. And he did just that, for all the im big and bad statements he had ever given me about all his fighting and standing up for himself he showed his true colours. When I do see him I will see that same look he had that night when he was threatend and ill just laugh at him because im better than him he has no heart. If he could stand in front of me and show any kind of remorse I would say thankyou and leave him be because it would be so hard for him to do I would respect that.
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I suppose that shows that you've thought about this and you can see reasons why you shouldn't go alpha. :)
 
Totality said:
Oh dear! Have you not seen his other posts? You're running the risk of being put in Hitman_Leons little black book! I'd look both ways whenever you come out of a doorway if I were you :eek:
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My post was humorous damnit!

Don't worry I have my keyboard ready for when I go out... ;)
 
Hen_Dawg said:
The sad truth
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And how sad he will be when he realises that his mum hates his dad.

Sorry but better for the child to be in a loving relationship 24/7 than around 2 angry un loving parents.


If he/she is young enough then i'm sure it'll be fine. But make sure your in it for the long haul, just not fair otherwise.
 
Stay away. Consider the child. consider the marriage. And finally consider the fact that it would make you a real asshat, who deserves nothing better for himself.
Give her space (obviously giving her no choice in the matter) and see how it plays out. If she leaves him then fine, play on :).
 
LordSplodge said:
Just like I was making sweeping generalizations! :D
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:D

Anyway seems ive been misjudged as a psychopathic knuckle dragging monkey by some, sorry but im not. To those who find what I have been saying bad I hope you never have to go through what I have and still have to. And for the op all I was trying to paint was a picture that might stick in his mind. Before he used his little head instead of his big head and made a problem that might not go away without running him over and hurting him in the process. For the record im trying to rebuild what I had before I wish I did not love her but I do and im trying, if that makes me a lesser man to some then so be it. But one thing is for sure I can take the knocks and come back fighting and its worth a try otherwise I might never know.
 
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read HITMAN LEON's story.

walk away, or consult the husband and do it the truethfull way.

never cheat, not unless you intend to totally **** someones life up and get set about with a bat.

i, like most people, know how it feels to be very close friends to someone and be very close to having a relationship. but consider how the husband will feel. his sadness and heart breaking will almost certainly lead to anger and a big craving for revenge. if you are serious about wanting a relationship with the girl, do it the truethfull way, not behind someones back.:cool:

i say put yourself in the husbands shoes, not the childs.

goodluck in whatever option you chose, you should listen to some of the guys on this forum, they seem wise;)
 
I consider myself a nice guy. I consider other people's feelings, I really do. But, then I am a loser in life, no gf, no great achievements etc...

The main times that I have really kicked ass is when I have said "screw the consequences" and got on with it. Guess what - you *don't* have a contract with the husband, child or anybody else for that matter. The kid might end up hating you, but then, in ape society, the new husband would *hunt and kill* the previous children, so at least we are "civilised". The husband doesn't have a right to be left alone, the child has no rights either concerning this. As selfish as it is, you (and I certainly) do not know the consequences.

People get married, people have children, people get divorced, get over it. The stability of the family is in the happiness of the parents. Parents who sacrifice everything to give their children "stability" might seem heroic, but please please please, believe me, it still leaks out in other ways. I would rather have happy parents than "married" parents. In some ways we are biologically tuned to have children with more than one partner, as opposed to this "mate for life" business. People who believe in mating for life often get sloppy and neglectful to their partner, who in turn end up looking for attention elsewhere. Just because you do not screw up this family's life, does not mean it won't get screwed up anyway. Its a fickle world, and all you should really do is understand *who it is that you truly care for* and *making them happy* and not trying to do this sociological guessing game where you tiptoe around trying to please everyone. Because you aren't ^^.
 
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